○Scene I: Eliza’s Laboratory

“All right. Now, if you could add some of your fire elemental power for me…”

“Okay.”

As the mysterious flickering ball began to buzz, Blade did as he was told and placed his hand on it, then filled the device with his fire elemental power.

“Right, next, I want you to put some raw spirit in there. It’d be a pain to separate it all out later, so don’t mix in any fighting force, magic, or elemental power, please. I’m looking for pure spirit—at least ninety-nine percent, if you can.”

“Right.”

Again, Blade followed Eliza’s instructions and added spirit into the sphere. Hitting 99 percent purity wasn’t particularly difficult for him. If he wanted, he could achieve something closer to 99.999 percent purity. The problem was that if spirit got too pure, it would turn into something entirely different, known as chi.

“Whoa, look out, your ice pop is dripping.”

“Oh.” Blade licked one side of the treat in his hand before any could spatter on the floor. “So this elemental power… What are you using it for?”

“My research, of course. Elemental power as an energy source. Creating and maintaining megawatt-class generators is a real drag—spirit and elemental power are a lot more convenient. Assuming I have someone willing to provide it, that is…”

Oh, thought Blade. Like a battery, then. Am I just a battery to her? Well, whatever.

“But…are you sure you’re all right with this?” she asked.

“With what?”

“I mean, normally, squeezing this much force out of someone would make them wither and dry up like a mummy.”

“Oh,” Blade replied casually, “there’s a trick to it.”

Power sources like spirit and magic were composed of the possessor’s own life force. Just as Eliza said, if that life force was simply converted into energy, it’d be impossible to squeeze out this much. No matter how strong or physically fit one was, the person contributing would be turned into a raisin. But there was a trick to it. Blade still had to pull the energy from his own life force, but instead of simply converting it, he used the energy from his surroundings to amplify what he produced dozens of times over. He could even create a perpetual energy cycle if he wanted to. This was all standard stuff in the Hero business; without such methods, it’d be impossible to keep up constant barrages of powerful techniques.

Blade was starting to think, Hm… Perhaps this wasn’t common knowledge. But he didn’t let it bother him. Eliza already knew of his former status as a Hero; there was no need to hide it.

Some time ago, Blade had asked Eliza what gave him away. She said she’d suspected something for a while, but it was when she repaired the Hero King’s armor that she became certain. After carefully examining the physical specs of the wearer—Blade, that is—she’d concluded he couldn’t be anything but a Hero.

Blade didn’t mind that Eliza had figured him out, but how many others were on to him? There weren’t that many people he needed to keep it from anymore, but still…

“Hey, uh, how many people do you think know?” he asked.

“Huh? Know what?”

“I mean, besides you, how many people know I used to be a He—…koff, koff… Y’know, all that?”

“Oh, that? Well, despite being a genius, I wouldn’t have been sure if you hadn’t told me. I’ve yet to invent a mind-reading machine, after all.”

“Okay. But how many people know? And who?”

“Dunno. I never discussed it with anyone. The only ones I’m sure about are General Dione, who practically blurts it out every chance she gets, and Iona, I guess. You guys have known each other for a while, haven’t you? I heard you used to visit her all the time.”

“I already knew about those two,” Blade said.

Several people in the student body were aware in addition to Eliza. Iona and the Overlord had known for a long time, and he’d confessed the truth to Sophie, too. Among the adults, anyone he’d known prior to joining the academy was in on the secret.

But what about the rest of them? Especially Clay, Kassim, Claire, and Yessica?

“Okay, but…do you think everyone knows? Or am I in the clear?”

“Why’re you asking me?” countered Eliza, lips pursed.

“’Cause, like, you’re the only one I can talk to about it.”

“Y-you can try and butter me up, but you’re not gonna get anything outta me.”

“C’mon, give me some information, at least.”

“Well, look, I…I’m not good at reading people, all right? Or picking up on vibes, either! I wouldn’t exile myself to this lab day and night, all by myself, unless I had to!”

“You’re not by yourself, though. Someone joined you recently.”

Blade motioned toward one corner of the lab, where a man was repeating the same task over and over with machinelike precision. This was James—a newcomer who served as Eliza’s assistant. He had been caught doing something bad in town, but they’d let him off the hook as long as he became Eliza’s slave in all but name.

He was very diligent, at least, calmly carrying out the monotonous tasks he was assigned. Occasionally, he’d lose it and erupt in a rage, but Eliza would chant the magic words “maybe I’ll make a homunculus for you,” which always instilled a fierce determination in him to keep going.

What had James done to end up here? What did those magic words mean? Blade hadn’t the foggiest idea.

“H-he’s just there for decoration,” Eliza argued, blushing. “A piece of experimental equipment. I mean, no matter how you slice it, he’s barely human, much less a member of the opposite sex!”

Huh? Why was she talking about the “opposite sex”? This conversation was quickly taking a strange turn. Oh well.

“A-anyway! If you’re that curious, why not just ask everyone directly?” Eliza suggested.

“Huh? You want me to go up to people and ask, ‘Did you know I’m an ex-Hero?’ Isn’t that kind of a bad idea…?”

Even someone who didn’t know would figure him out if he asked them something like that. Blade wasn’t too sure about this course of action…

“What are you, stupid? Just…casually work the question into some idle chitchat.”

“Work it in…? How?”

“You figure it out. I’m busy. Now go! C’mon! Get out of here!”

Eliza promptly kicked him out. Blade, taking the cue, made his escape before any coffee mugs or beakers came flying at him.

○Scene II: Asking Clay

“Please, make yourself comfortable.” The handsome man generously welcomed Blade in. “It’s pretty rare for you to visit.”

“Is it?”

Blade felt like he stopped by Clay’s dorm fairly often. He paid visits to a lot of different people, but among the guys, he got along best with Clay and Kassim.

“Oh, where’s Kassim?” he asked.

“Ah, him? Well, you know…given the current time…he’s probably out doing that.”

“‘That’?”

“Yes, that.”

Blade didn’t know what “that” was, but he assumed it was probably some kind of training.

Clay brought out some refreshments. It wasn’t like the girls’ gatherings, resplendent with fragrant teas and multiple snack options in a perfectly arranged spread. Instead, there was only one kind of tea in the pot and a single variety of snack, though there was certainly a whole lot of it. After nibbling on some and washing it down with tea, Blade got down to business.

“So, Clay… You know how there’s a Hero, right?”

Eliza had suggested he work the question into some chitchat, and this was what he had come up with.

“This is rather sudden,” Clay said, taken aback.

No! I failed! Didn’t I “work it in” properly?! Blade wasn’t sure what his next move should be. He felt like he had tripped and fallen flat on his face at the very start of a race.

“That’s right, the Hero King…,” Clay muttered, looking into the distance.

“Huh?”

“He came to visit us some time ago, didn’t he? He taught me so much…”

“Huh? What?” Blade waved his hand in front of Clay’s face. He seemed to be gazing at another planet, his focus far away from this one.

“I do hope the Hero can come back to train with me again sometime…”

“Yeah, right,” Blade said without thinking. That was a one-time special favor. The king had begged him, sniveling and crying, so he’d reluctantly agreed. He hated to see the king kowtow to him like that, so it was a very, very, very special favor—truly once-in-a-lifetime. Never, ever again.

“Oh, no? Hm, not even one more time?”

“Nope,” Blade said firmly.

“No chance at all?”

“None,” Blade replied, a hard conviction in his voice.

“None, huh…?” Clay was visibly disappointed. “Well, if I ever get the chance to have him train me again…I’d love to learn Dragon Eater, the second of the dragon-destroying skills…”

The Hero had shown Clay a move or two when they last trained. Clay had gotten to the point where he could launch Dragon Smasher, the most beginner-oriented of the set. But even then, it was incomplete. That was the first of the dragon-destroying skills, and Dragon Eater was the second. Blade used that skill a lot, and in his eyes, anything of that level or higher could be employed in actual battle. Dragon Eater was a move that consumed little spirit and could be shot rapid-fire, making it great for keeping foes at bay (that was how people appraised it in the Hero business, though. For regular people, it was considered a siege-level technique).

“I’ve mastered the first technique of the set, you know, and I’d love for the Hero to see it in action. That’s why I think it’s about time I learned the second, so…”

Sorry, but no can do.

Before Blade could teach Clay the second skill, the swordsman would need to truly master Dragon Smasher. Right now, he was letting it shoot out and explode way too soon; he needed to build it up before properly unleashing it, thereby boosting its force several times over. At the moment, he was just wasting spirit.

“Oh…? Where are you going, Blade? Weren’t we talking about the Hero?”

Blade waved and left the room. He had achieved what he set out to do. Clay was on the no list.

○Scene III: Asking Sophie

Next on Blade’s list was Kassim. Clay had said he was out doing that, which Blade assumed was some kind of solo training. But when Blade went to the Proving Ground, Kassim was nowhere to be found. He probably should have asked Clay for more details.

“Oh, hey! Sophie! Do you know where Kassim is?”

There was one person there, however—Sophie. There was no need to ask her, of course. She knew Blade was an ex-Hero.

She raised an eyebrow and stared back at him. “…Kassim?”

“Yeah. Kassim.”

“I believe he’s doing that right about now.”

“Oh, that…?”

She’d used the same phrasing as Clay. Where could Kassim be, and what kind of training could he possibly be doing?

“……”

Sophie turned to face the wall, but she wasn’t looking at anything in particular. Instead, Blade could tell her mind was focused on something far, far away. Sophie had a keen sense for subtle, distant presences, a sort of natural talent that even a former Hero couldn’t match.

“…He is there,” she stated softly. “In the usual spot.”

“All right,” said Blade. “The usual spot” didn’t give him much to work with, but he waved to Sophie and resolved to simply walk in the direction she’d indicated and see what happened.

○Scene IV: Asking Kassim

“The only thing this way is the thermae, though…,” Blade muttered.

After walking for a little while, Blade came across the giant open-air bath dug into one corner of the grounds. This was where everyone at the academy came to relax, although it became particularly crowded between the end of class and dinnertime, with boys and girls all washing away their sweat together.

As Blade walked along the perimeter of the bath, he saw someone through the bushes.

Ah. There he is.

He’d finally found Kassim.

The boy was lying very low, his head buried in the shrubbery. Branches and leaves were stuck to his shoulders and back, as if he was deliberately trying to camouflage himself. What kind of “training” was this? It looked like recon work to Blade. But whatever Kassim was up to, Blade didn’t want to get in the way, so he stealthily approached from behind, trying not to make a sound.

“Hey, Kassim—”

Blade waited until he was right next to him to speak up. It almost gave Kassim a heart attack, but he deftly managed to stay crouched even as he leaped a few inches into the air.

“B-Blade? Don’t scare me like that, man…”

“Sorry. Hey so, I wanted to ask you something.”

“What? You trying to peep, too?”

“Hm? What’s that mean?”

It seemed this “peeping” was part of Kassim’s daily regimen. Blade had no idea what kind of training it was, but that didn’t matter.

“No, I—”

“Hey, I get it,” Kassim interrupted. “Just shut up for a sec. You don’t have to give me the whole story, okay? You might be a super-being, but you’re still a man, aren’t ya? I totally get it! And nothing says ‘I’m a man’ more than this!”

Apparently, Kassim already understood Blade. And now the conversation was about masculinity for some reason.

“Here, take a look,” he said. “We can watch together. Best seat in the house. It’s my secret spot, but I’ll let you in on it. But don’t tell anyone, all right?”

Blade vigorously nodded. Getting clued in on a secret from a good friend was kind of exciting. But…what was this place anyway? All he could see was part of the bath, its steamy water stretching out into the distance. This place was practically a lake, after all.

Girls waded through periodically, parting the waters with their thighs as they passed. Kassim lay low in the bushes, staring intently.

What’s he even looking at? And where?

Blade didn’t understand one bit. If Kassim wanted to see some nude girls, for example, wouldn’t he be better off just going into the bath and looking at them there? A man’s incessant drive to see naked women was wholly alien to Blade.

“Hey… Hey…”

“Shhh! It’s getting good.” Kassim was totally focused.

A girl was crossing through the water, splashing as she walked… Was that Lunaria? Kassim’s eyes were glued to the spectacle. Lunaria had recently started attending Rosewood Academy, and right now, she didn’t have a stitch of clothing on her. Kassim was concentrating every ounce of his brainpower on watching her. Maybe it was particularly rare to see Lunaria nude, or something.

“……”

Blade crouched next to Kassim for a little while as the two of them stared at Lunaria’s naked body. Blade thought her body was the most, well, curvy out of all the girls at school. Kassim seemed particularly dedicated to watching her chest. But why wasn’t Blade panting like Kassim was, despite staring at the exact same body parts? Was Blade ill?

Suddenly, he remembered why he was here. “Hey, Kassim.”

“What? We’re gonna be in big trouble if they see us. Keep it down.”

That wasn’t really any of Blade’s business, though. “Hey, you know how, like, there’s a Hero, right?”

“Huh? The Hero King? Didn’t he come visit our school a little while ago?”

“Clay was talking about how much he wanted him to come back and teach us some more. What do you think, Kassim?” That seemed like a pretty good “test” question. Perfect, in fact.

“Oh, I don’t know. We probably can’t get him again, can we?”

“Why do you think that?”

“Well, I mean, like…”

Blade brought his ear closer to Kassim, eagerly awaiting his reply.

“…The Hero’s gotta be really busy, right? He probably doesn’t have the time to hang out with a bunch of kids like us.”

That wasn’t true. It just so happened the Hero was a kid, too. The same age as Kassim, in fact.

“Like, last time, the king had to grovel on his hands and knees to get the guy to come, didn’t he? It was a one-time special favor.”

Close. There wasn’t any hands-and-knees stuff. Blade hadn’t let it go that far. The king had been about to do just that, but Blade hadn’t wanted to see it, so he’d finally caved.

This meant Kassim was on the no list as well. Anyone who gave a normal response to a question like that was a no. Assured that his practical, innovative judgment method was totally infallible, Blade smiled triumphantly and left Kassim to his viewing.

Kassim was a no, and next up was… Ah, yes. Yessica and Claire were right there in the bath. Blade wasted no time walking through the thicket of bushes and jumping straight into the water.

○Scene V: Asking Yessica

“Geh! Blade?! And Kassim?!”

Yessica stood up from the bath, water splashing around her naked body, and pointed. Her gaze went right through Blade’s body and pierced Kassim, who was still hiding in the thicket.

“You’re peeping again?!” she shouted.

Her voice was loud enough to quickly attract a large crowd of girls. They stood tall around her, hands on their hips, trying out their best high-pressure glaring techniques on Kassim as he crouched in the bushes.

“N-no, uh, it’s not what it looks like! It’s really not!” Kassim tried to explain himself.

How is it not what it looks like? There’s no doubt he was “peeping.” He said so himself, didn’t he?

“No excuses!”

The girls were all furious. Every one of them was now in battle mode, their fighting force, magic, elemental power, and blazing auras of anger seeming to take physical form and fill the air.

Blade didn’t really get why they were so angry. He was a normal man who understood normal reactions, and his theory was that they were mad about being seen in the buff… But they all bathed together anyway, so they saw each other naked on a regular basis. Why was the same thing so wrong when it was framed as “peeping”? Hm… Blade felt like he was peering into an abyss.

“Any last words?” asked the girls.

“Eeep!”

They loomed over Kassim as he cowered in their presence. His life could’ve ended right then and there.

“Prepare to face justice! Time to fly up to the stars!”

A tremendous blow promptly sent Kassim into the sky.

“Oh… We sent him pretty high this time. I bet he’ll cover a lot of distance.”

Blade put a hand on his forehead to shade his eyes as he watched Kassim disappear from view. Given his trajectory, Blade thought he might wind up on the Proving Ground roof.

“…So. Were you peeping, too, Blade?”

Yessica, as nude as ever, put her hands on the well-defined curves of her waist and seethed at Blade.

“No, I just had something to talk to Kassim about.”

Blade was already in the water up to his knees when he began taking off his soaked pants. He tossed them, along with his top, onto a nearby rock, then removed the rest of his clothing. You were meant to be naked in the bath, a fact of which Blade, a master of common sense, was well aware.

“…All right.” Yessica snorted as she submerged herself. Blade sat next to her with a splash. “Kassim, though… He’s such a moron, isn’t he? Like, if he wants to watch, he could just hop in like normal. What’s he even thinking?”

“Has to do with masculinity, I think,” said Blade.

“‘Masculinity’? What’s that mean? Do you even know, Blade?”

“Nope. I’m a normal guy, though, so I should probably learn about it…”

“‘Normal’? I don’t think so, Blade.”

“Yes I am. I’m extremely normal. I’m a normal, healthy young man.”

“Okay. Well, in that case, Kassim isn’t normal, so don’t copy him, all right?”

“Oh? He’s not?”

“No. He’s a lazy idiot horndog who gets carried away all the time. If that’s normal, then I feel bad for men everywhere.”

“He’s not normal, huh…?”

Blade had been clueless. He’d thought everything apart from him was “normal,” but it seemed that, among the general public, there were both normal and abnormal people…and Kassim belonged to the latter tribe.

“No. And if you keep hanging out with Kassim, you’ll become just as idiotic and horned up as him, okay?”

Blade shook his head. If being a moronic horndog was normal, Blade would welcome the traits with open arms. But that didn’t appear to be the case.

“Oh, by the way, Yessica, I had something I wanted to ask you.” Blade scooted closer to her so their conversation would have a little more privacy.

“Wh-what is it?”

Yessica scooted away the same distance Blade had moved toward her, politely maintaining the space between them. Blade responded by scooting closer again. Yessica stayed put this time, giving up on her escape, and instead looked at Blade head-on.

“What are you…? So you don’t wanna peep, but you’re out to molest me or something? That’s exactly why I told you to not follow Kassim’s example. Unless you really want to…”

“Huh? What’s ‘molest’? Is that a normal thing to do? …Because if so, I want to learn all about it.”

“No. Sorry. I had the wrong idea. You scared me for a second.” Yessica fanned herself with her hand, apparently surprised about something.

“Anyway, so, you know how there’s, like, the Hero, right?” asked Blade.

“Um… Oh, sure. The Hero King who visited us, you mean? What about him?”

“Clay was all like ‘boy, I hope he comes back to teach us again,’ but what do you think?” Blade hit Yessica with his tried-and-true judgment method.

“Well…that’d depend on the Hero, wouldn’t it?”

She gave him a strange, probing look. Blade glanced around, wondering if anyone else was nearby. They weren’t. Apparently, she was shooting the glare straight at him.

“Kassim said it might not be possible,” said Blade. “Because the Hero’s too busy and stuff.”

“Yeah, maybe. I’m sure the Hero has a lot on his plate.”

“What would he be busy with?”

“I don’t know. Maybe he’s busy enjoying the springtime of his youth?”

“‘Springtime’…?”

Blade looked up. Two birds were circling around in the reddening sky—Ein and Zwei. They cried out, clearly wanting to go home. To them, home meant their family’s nest situated on the topmost spire of the royal palace.

“What’s ‘the springtime of your youth’?” asked Blade.

“Well…for example, a time when you might try to court someone you like.”

Yessica scooted closer. They had been sitting side by side in the bath, but now she was almost pressing herself against him. She took one of his arms and pressed her chest against it, using her other hand to tickle his thigh.

Blade frowned. Why was she clinging to him?

“Is this ‘molesting’?” he asked.

He figured he’d better check, just in case. Was this what Yessica was talking about a second ago? His extraordinary sensitivity to what was normal was telling him he was right—that “molesting” meant making physical contact. And if so, Yessica was molesting him by running her hand along his thigh, right?

“No,” she replied. “Molesting is physically forcing yourself on someone who doesn’t want you.”

“Oh, okay.” Then she wasn’t molesting him after all. He didn’t mind the contact or anything. “Then, what is this?”

“Hmm… A kind of seduction, I guess?”

Yessica pressed her supple breasts against him as she spoke. Everyone’s breasts felt different, and Yessica’s were the supplest. Blade looked at her face, which was now so close that he could feel her breath.

“How is seduction different from molesting?”

“…Not working, huh? Figures.”

“What’s not working?”

“I was just trying to figure out why you were probing me like that.”

“Oh, umm…” Blade was cornered. Yessica had really good intuition about this sort of thing. There was a reason she wanted to become an intelligence agent. “No, um, well…”

Blade was tongue-tied. He had no idea whether Yessica knew his secret or not; he was utterly clueless. She wasn’t giving him the same clear reactions that Clay and Kassim had provided.

“Wh-what about you, Yessica? Do you feel the same way as Clay and Kassim? Like…d-do you want to see the Hero again? Maybe?” Blade tried his hardest to continue with the question.

“Hm…” Yessica put a finger to her lips, considering the idea. “I don’t really care either way.”

“Wh-why not?”

“Because I have someone I’m interested in more than the Hero… Will that suffice?” Yessica pressed her chest against Blade’s arm again.

So does she know or not? Which is it? Blade didn’t have a clue. She kept answering his questions with more questions.

“Hey…,” she said. “What do you think? Rub, rub, rub…”

He was being rubbed.

“Well, uhhh…” It was all Blade could do to keep playing dumb.

“Oh, Blade. I didn’t know you were here.” Lunaria approached, her voice soft. “May I join you?”

She slid in next to Blade, not disturbing the water’s surface at all. Yessica was now on one side of Blade with Lunaria on the other. He was sandwiched. Lunaria took Blade’s arm, just as Yessica had, and pressed it tightly against her chest. She was much more well-endowed than Yessica was.

“Well?” asked Yessica. “Come on. Aren’t you going to ask her?”

“Ask me what?” said Lunaria.

“Um…,” Blade began. “Well, about the Hero…”

“The Hero King…? Ah, yes, I heard he visited Rosewood Academy in the past. What an honor it must have been to receive instruction from the Hero! I simply couldn’t be more jealous. I know the king personally oversees this academy, but even then, it’s an incredible perk. Honestly, I was green with envy.”

Yessica winked at Blade. He knew what that meant. It meant Lunaria was on the no list.

“Actually, Lunaria,” said Yessica, “what kind of person do you think the Hero is?”

“What he’s like…? Didn’t you meet him in person?” Lunaria asked.

“Well, that’s the thing. He seems kind of shy. He was wearing a full suit of armor the whole time, so I never really saw him. I don’t know what he looks like at all. Earnest said he sounded like a nice, charming middle-aged man.”

“I think he’s young,” said Lunaria. “I’m basing that off evidence, not my own hopes and desires like Anna. If you read the king’s memoirs, you’ll see that whenever he brings up the Hero, his choice of words seems to refer to a younger person—perhaps young enough to be his own son. In fact, it might even be fair to call him a boy.”

Gulp.

Lunaria had profiled him like an expert detective. She had perfectly captured the full image of the Hero.

“Regardless of his age, he saved the world. I’m sure he’s incredibly strong.”

“Yeah, he’s got to be some kind of super-being.”

Yessica’s casual agreement had Blade positively sweating.

“And…you know,” said Lunaria. “I was conceited enough to think I was at a pretty high level, but recently, I learned firsthand that there’s a whole other level of strength—one beyond my comprehension.”

“Oh, really?”

“Yes, really.” Lunaria smiled at Blade directly, making his heart skip a beat.

Blade had given Lunaria some special training when she first came to the academy. That must’ve been what she was referring to. He had brutally killed her in a simulation many times, repeating the slaughter over and over again. He’d kept up the killing, regardless of whether she resisted or not. It was an overwhelmingly one-sided massacre, so intense that concepts like stronger or weaker ceased to even matter. That had to be what she was thinking of.

“The Hero must have strength beyond anyone’s comprehension. Learning from someone like him could help you obtain new powers and bring you a whole dimension or two ahead of where you were before. I would love to receive such training, at least once. Truly, I regret not being at the academy when he was here.” Lunaria looked up at the darkening sky.

“Hey, by the way, Luna… When you first came here, I remember you talking about Scion I, II, and III.”

“Oh? Come to think of it…”

“Weren’t you just saying that the Hero could bring your abilities to a new level or something…?”

“Um… Yes, I did say that…” Lunaria’s eyes turned toward Blade. His heart skipped another beat.

“How did you describe the Hero again?”

“I said he’s young. Very young. At an age where it’d be acceptable to call him a young man…or a boy, even…”

“So about the same age as us, you mean?”

“Yes… Perhaps…” Lunaria tightened her grip on Blade’s arm. It was pretty much locked in her hand by now.

Yessica winked again. What did that mean? Blade had no idea! What was going on here? Lunaria was supposed to be on the no list, but now he wasn’t sure.

“I think I’ll stop stewing over how I missed being taught by the Hero King, though. After all…I had Blade teach me instead, and there’s no better teacher than him. Not even the Hero himself…” Lunaria maintained her death grip.

“No, uh, I’m not your teacher or anything,” Blade protested. “I’m just another student. Your friend. That’s all.”

“What, your friends can’t be your teachers?”

“No, they can, but…”

Lunaria pouted, but even Blade knew her feelings weren’t actually hurt. That said, her voice, her attitude, the amount of touching she was doing… What was up with her today? Was this the seduction thing Yessica was talking about? Or was she just molesting him?

And for that matter, why am I being seduced or molested in the first place?

Lunaria’s breasts, of course, were still pressing against him. Or maybe she was pushing them up against him on purpose. Not that it mattered either way, but…

“Ugh! Hey! Over there! What’re you doing?!”

That was Earnest’s voice.

“Indecency is not allowed in the public bath! None! Strictly forbidden! Move away from each other! You’re too close!”

She was shrieking at them. Wasn’t that a little odd? She sometimes stuck her body super close to Blade’s, too, pressing her chest against him and all. Blade would say, “Hey, you’re hitting me with those,” just to make sure she was aware, and she’d reply, “Yeah, sure am,” like she knew exactly what she was doing.

“Care to join us, Anna?” asked Yessica.

“Wha—?!” Earnest’s eyes shot open.

“Oh, stop bullying the poor girl,” cut in Lunaria. “You know she’s way too timid to say yes.”

“What did you say?!” Earnest Flaming was the kind of girl who always fell like a sack of potatoes at the slightest provocation. “Who’s ‘timid’? Huh? Who’s all submissive and hung up on him?!”

“We didn’t say anything about you being ‘hung up,’” said Lunaria. “What are you hung up over? Is it about who’s getting some, maybe?”

“Shut up! Blade always compliments me on my skills! I know I have a lot of them!”

“Hey, uh, what does ‘getting some’ mean?” asked Blade, curious. “Getting some of what?”

“Can you just die already?” Earnest shot him a frigid glare.

“Right, Blade! That rock over there! Lie down on it!” Earnest pointed toward the boulder.

“Huh? But I’m feeling fine today…”

“Hurry up!”

“All right…”

Blade reluctantly lay down on the rock. Between all the scolding and vitriol, he wasn’t having too good of a time.

Soon, Earnest’s hands made their way across his back. The flame-element spirit made its way through his skin, warming him up even more than the hot water of the bath. A comfortable feeling spread through Blade’s body, and everything else ceased to matter.

“Oh, right, right. Blade?” said Yessica. “Hey, Blade?”

“Hm…?”

“Do you want to ask Anna, too?”

“About what?”

“You know, that thing.”

“Oh, that…?” He didn’t really see the need to.

“Huh? What thing?” asked Earnest. “Are you keeping secrets from me?”

“No, no… You know the Hero, right?”

“Th-the Hero?” Earnest’s hands stopped moving. “D-don’t get the wrong idea, now… I…I don’t see him in that way or anything…”

“In what way, huuuh?”

“It doesn’t matter! S-stop worrying about it! If you keep hounding me, I’m gonna stop massaging you!”

Blade hadn’t even asked for a massage. But now it was pretty clear that Earnest was on the no list, too, just as he’d thought.

“But…do you think the Hero’s gonna come back?” he asked. He wasn’t sure why he’d asked it, but now the words were out of his mouth.

“Huh? The Hero…? Well, it’d be great if he did, but… Ah! I mean, it’d be great because it’d be a huge learning opportunity for someone like me, a practitioner of martial arts! That kind of thing! It’s nothing like that at all!”

“Right, for sure.”

Blade had no idea what Earnest meant by “that,” but he nodded along anyway. Based on his uncanny ability to understand normal interactions, he figured it was best to simply nod and agree with her.

“But…I’m sure the Hero is busy…,” muttered Earnest. “I suppose it’s a miracle he even came here once… It’ll probably never happen again…”

Even Blade wasn’t sure why he decided to speak up at that moment.

“I’ll ask the king, okay?” he said. “And see if we can get him to come again.”

“Really?!” Earnest hugged him from behind, delighted.

Blade, feeling the weight of two objects against his back, closed his eyes in sheer delight.

They’re hitting me again…

○Scene I: At the Lab

“Here you go, Eliza. It’s from Madam at the dining hall. She wants you to go over there and have a proper meal for a change.”

“Oh… Thanks.”

Eliza sluggishly reached out for the plate Claire had brought her. She had dark circles under her eyes, her hair was flat and limp, and her clothes looked like she hadn’t changed out of them in at least three days. Her colleague, James, was lying under the desk—or, more accurately, he was stretched out, sleeping. At first, Claire had thought he was dead.

“So, wanna take a bath, maybe?” suggested Claire. “I can wash your back and hair, if you want.”

The last time Eliza had bathed was probably when she’d last changed clothes. As another girl, Claire felt her friend had crossed a line with this lack of hygiene.

“I’m working on my research, and I’m right at the homestretch. I don’t have time for distractions.”

“Oh.” Claire quickly backed down. Pestering people wasn’t her style. “Is there anything I can help you with?”

“Give me your black hair,” James said, rising up from underneath the desk.

“No,” Claire replied, making her voice as sharp as she could muster.

James—the assistant with a handsome face and a sordid past—used to be a serial haircutter, forcibly snatching girls’ hair in broad daylight. Now, however, he had been reformed and was serving as Eliza’s research associate. Claire got the feeling he might relapse any moment, though.

“You know,” Eliza began, “I was analyzing the homunculus creation process, and everything seemed sound right up to the part where you need to use a woman’s hair as a catalyst. James said he needed about one hundred and ten pounds for the recipe, but in fact, only about a quarter pound would suffice. It’s not the raw material used to form the homunculus, after all—it’s just the catalyst that triggers the chain reaction.”

“A quarter pound? How much is that?”

“In terms of length, maybe a foot?”

“Huh? That much? If I give you that, my hair will stop at my shoulders.”

Claire grabbed fistfuls of her black hair—a mane she was rightfully proud of—and took a few steps back.

“It’ll do wonders for your split ends,” Eliza assured her. “I’ll even prescribe you a hair growth potion. That freak over there will get on his knees and beg. So come on. Do it. Hurry!”

“Please! I’m begging you!” James chimed in, already on the floor.

“But… I can’t just…” Claire was torn. She couldn’t say no when asked so fervently; that was just the sort of person she was.

“It doesn’t have to be right now, of course,” said Eliza. “We don’t actually need the hair until much later in the process… Anyway, would you mind moving that graduated cylinder over to the pedestal in the back of the lab? It’s too heavy for the two of us to move without some extra machinery, but you could use some of your fancy super-strength to get it done fast, couldn’t you?”

“Please… Could you not bring that up? It makes me sound like a monster…”

Super-strength—or, to be exact, temporary muscle amplification—was one of Claire’s intrinsic skills, alongside her signature, Restoration. The amount of amplification a person could work their spirit into producing varied, but in Claire’s case, her potential muscular gain was off the charts. Even as a toddler, she could tap into strength dozens of times what was normally possible. At this point, she had no problem bench-pressing several tons at once.

So Claire placed her hands around the graduated cylinder, which was big enough to fit a grown man, and turned around.

“Wait. Wasn’t that freak over there really strong, too?” she asked.

At one point during his head-shaving rampage, James had defeated Claire, Yessica, Sophie, Iona, Cú, and even Earnest. He had to be at least semi-champion level.

“Oh, that guy can’t do anything without his bandages. He was relying on his own inventions to boost his physical power.”

“Oh, really?”

“They’re not bandages, but autonomous cloth-based armor.”

“Let’s just go with ‘bandages,’ okay? The other name doesn’t really roll off the tongue.”

Claire was having trouble following, so she went ahead and started moving the cylinder. It was heavy enough that several adult men might struggle with it, but for Claire, it was a breeze, even with her slender arms.

When she placed it on the specified pedestal, there was an audible click, and a circular ring on the pedestal’s surface lit up.

“Oh, it’s working. I can hear it humming… The light’s on, too,” Claire said.

Eliza and the freak weren’t paying attention, however. They were engaged in some kind of technical discussion.

Taking a closer look, Claire noticed an opening on the front side of the cylinder. It was just big enough for a person to shimmy their way through.

Wait, hang on! Are people meant to go inside this device?

“Um, do people go in this thing?”

No response. The other two were too busy inventing to notice her.

The round light on the pedestal pulsed, the rhythm growing stronger one second then weaker the next as it expanded and contracted, almost inviting her to climb in. It was more than enough to make Claire give in to her impulse.

“Here goes!” She stepped inside.

Hummm…

The pedestal beneath her feet began to rumble. The noise grew louder and louder, and then the ring of light began to spin.

“Huh?”

Claire wondered if maybe this hadn’t been such a great idea after all. It was time to get out. She attempted to escape, only for the opening to close with a whoosh. She was now trapped inside.

Claire banged on the glass, but Eliza and James were turned away and couldn’t hear a thing. Only when she started slamming much harder did they finally notice.

Claire waved her hands. “I’m stuck in here,” she said, smiling as she waved.

All color drained from Eliza’s and James’s faces. They started shouting and running frantically from side to side, bumping into walls, desks, and equipment as they did. Then, all of a sudden, they stopped. They stood bolt upright and brought both hands to their cheeks before letting out strange, guttural cries.

Um… Did I do something really bad?

Claire’s mind was starting to grow hazy. The objects around her began to shrink, and shrink, and shrink. Her head hit the top of the cylinder, and then she felt herself being pressed from all sides. Everything hurt, and for a moment, she feared she’d be crushed to death. Then the glass shattered, and she was free. Moments later, the ceiling came rushing toward her, and she went through the same experience all over again.

Her body now filled the entire laboratory, pushing everything else against the walls. Eliza and her weirdo assistant had shrunk down to the size of newborn puppies. At this rate, they’d be flattened. So Claire strained her limbs, struggling to retain control of her body. The room burst around her as her body broke through the building’s walls.

She was free…but she was now a giant.

○Scene II: Claire Mountain

“Whoa, what happened? She’s huge!”

“Wow, Claire’s a whole mountain now!”

“She’s approximately ten times her normal size. If you needed further precision, my high-end specs allow me to provide between one and eight decimal places.”

Blade rushed to the scene with Earnest and the gang the moment they heard the news. There, they saw the majestic figure of Claire standing tall in the courtyard. From a distance, she looked like the usual Claire, but as they got closer, her new size became readily apparent. Having something to compare it to made matters even clearer—she dwarfed the partially destroyed school building where Eliza’s lab had been, along with the large trees dotting the courtyard. In fact, her shoulders easily cleared even the highest treetops.

“Hey, Claire!”

The group approached her, waving their hands and shouting loudly. But Claire didn’t see them. She just stood there, arms wrapped around herself, anxious and alone. Her body possessed a mass and volume like nothing imaginable, making the trees around her seem like miniatures.

“What a monster, huh?” said Blade.

“Master, that is a disrespectful way to refer to a young woman,” scolded Iona.

Having a former Guardian lecture him about what a “young woman” was struck Blade as rather odd.

“At a ten-to-one scale, she could be described as ‘Mobile Suit’ size. That is what my high-end specs are telling me.”

“What’s that mean?”

“In Mother’s database, there are records of an ancient manned weapon from human history of a similar size. The one put on display in a land known as Odaiba was particularly famous.”

Huh. So people had huge humanoid weapons like this way back in the past?

Of course, size didn’t necessarily translate to strength, so Blade couldn’t tell how powerful such an ancient weapon might be. Could it outclass a champion or even a Hero? Who could say?

“Hey, Claire!” shouted Earnest. “Look this way! Hey! Heeey!”

Claire still didn’t notice. The small animals scurrying around her feet didn’t even enter her field of vision.

“Hey, Earnest? Could you maybe whip up a huge fireball and throw it at her?” suggested Blade.

“What? No, you idiot! I can’t do that! It’d kill her! She’s not you!”

“Nah, at her scale, it’d just feel a little warm, is all. She’s never gonna notice us unless we do something big… Wait, why would you be shooting fireballs at me? Whatever. Hey, Iona, can you fire that proton beam or whatever you call it?”

“Charging energy. Three percent… Five percent…”

“Enough!”

With a loud thud, Earnest’s fists came down on both Iona and Blade. The latter groaned and held his head. Lately, Earnest had figured out how to penetrate his spirit barrier and hit him directly on the skull.

Left with no other choice, Blade called out once more to Claire, who was still towering over them.

“Hey, Claire!”

No response. She still hadn’t noticed them. Being over fifty feet tall made everyone else seem trivially small. They weren’t really small, though. She was just huge. Huge as a mountain, in fact. Claire Mountain, if you will.

Looking up at the giant girl from below, the group could see one thing very clearly. They couldn’t really help it—especially from this angle, where it was in plain sight and completely visible. There, inside her skirt, was a broad piece of white cloth. Since it was now ten times its original size, it was about the length of a sail on a fully decked out sailboat.

“Hey, Claire!” Blade decided to break the news to her. “We can see up your skirt!”

The moment he said it, the previously inert Claire demonstrated a sudden, violent reaction.

“Huh?! Aaah!!!”

A ball of iron fell from the sky. It was Claire’s weapon, a vicious mace bristling with spikes, except blown up to ten times its original size. In terms of mass, it was roughly one thousand times heavier than it had been before. And that object was now descending from the sky like a doomsday weapon. It was as though she’d uprooted a tower and swung it at them.

Ka-blam! Ka-blam!

Ka-blam! Ka-blam!

“Aaah! Don’t look! Don’t look at meee!”

With the force of a natural disaster, she battered the ground over and over. That mace wasn’t just making craters in the ground—it was causing earthquakes. Even far-off buildings shuddered and jolted in the face of such enormous tremors.

“Oof… Ugh.” Earnest got up first and shook off the dust. “Claire, come on! That’s really dangerous! You’re a lot bigger now, all right? You need to use a little more restraint!”

“Earnest? Are you there? Y-you’re all right! I…I think I messed up!”

“Aaah! Stop walking! Stand still! You’re gonna trample us! Stop! Stop!”

“I-I’m sorry!”

Claire Mountain stopped in her tracks, and the little people on the ground exhaled in relief. Being stepped on by someone her size could lead to serious injury, no doubt. Maybe even death.

“Okay, is everyone still here?” Earnest began to take command, as she was naturally inclined to do. “Clay, check. Kassim, check. Yessica, check. Sophie, check. Lunaria, check. Leonard and Iona, check, check. Okay, good. That’s everyone.”

“Hee-hee-hee… She counted us, too. Did you see that, Leonard?”

“Yes, Iona. It’s quite an honor.”

Earnest pointed at everyone to confirm their presence.

Right. Everyone’s here… Or, wait, aren’t we missing someone?

“Huh? Is someone missing?” muttered Earnest.

“Um, Anna,” said Yessica. “I think…he might have disappeared.”

“‘He’? Who’s he?”

“The one you didn’t point at and say ‘check.’”

“Um…?” Earnest looked confused. When they’d heard that Claire and the school were in trouble, everyone had rushed over. Shouldn’t they all still be here? “Oh. I forgot Blade!”

Of course. Blade wasn’t really a person anyway—he was a super-being. What reason was there to worry about him?

“Where’s Blade?”

“In the epicenter…”

Yessica pointed out a gouged-out crater where Claire Mountain had bashed her mace against the ground repeatedly. The large depression appeared empty at first. But then, with a great bang, the earth rose up.

“Ugh! That really hurt, Claire!”

“I…I’m sorry! I’m sorry, Blade! Are you okay?”

The giant creature gesticulated wildly as Earnest, beads of sweat dripping down her forehead, turned back to the rest of the group.

“See? He was just fine! Right? Right?!”

○Scene III: The Truth Behind the Blowup

Splooosh… Splash, splash…

There were a lot more waves in the bath that night as everyone filed inside, covered in dirt from head to toe. And the turmoil wasn’t just limited to the water.

“So, hey, Eliza, did you figure out why Claire got so big?” asked Earnest.

Eliza poured a generous amount of shampoo onto her fine, curly hair and started lathering up. How many days’ worth of oil and grime was she washing off? Even she wasn’t sure.

“Well, theoretically, this never should have happened at all. Even if the device malfunctioned, there’s no way it should enlarge someone like that. That machine was actually a prototype of a material teleportation device I was working on. We’d envisioned various risks, like humans getting mixed up with flies during the transfer and creating a new species or something… But making someone huge was completely unexpected. We never saw it coming. It’s given us a lot of new material to research, though.”

Eliza kept her eyes shut and let Earnest wash her hair. Earnest continued to scrub, idly wondering if this was what motherhood was like.

“Um… So she’s like that because of a failed experiment?” she asked. “Do you really think it’s okay to conduct experiments like that on people? Did you get permission from His Majesty? You’ve gotta make him take responsibility for everything. That’s the only thing that guy’s good for, after all.”

“Um, actually, it’s all my fault,” said Claire, her voice booming down from above. “I went into that graduated cylinder without asking and wound up activating it somehow… Eliza didn’t do anything.”

They were all in the academy’s vast open-air bath, a roofless, lakelike structure big enough for the enormous Claire to interact with everyone safely. She was too big to fit inside any building, and while she could stand upright in the Proving Ground, there was no way to cram her through the entrance. She could fit her head, shoulders, and waist through, but her butt had proved impossible. She had a lot of junk in the trunk, as it turned out.

“So, um…how long will Claire be like this?” Earnest asked as she rinsed Eliza’s hair.

“Well, it’ll take some time, to be sure. We’re wading into unknown territory when it comes to physical biology. First, I need to analyze what’s going on; second, I need to formulate a hypothesis; third, we need to create a device that reverses the phenomenon and shrinks her back down. I think we’ll have to tackle several technical challenges along the way, so unless humanity as a whole—and I, in particular—make several scientific breakthroughs, it’ll be simply impossible.”

“Huh? So she’s going to stay like that?”

“…But these are physical laws we’re dealing with, and all such laws must eventually bow at my feet. That, too, is a physical law, for I am Eliza Maxwell.”

Eliza wasn’t making much sense, but it sounded like Claire’s chances of returning to normal were at least somewhat decent.

“So when you say it’ll ‘take some time,’ how much time are we talking?”

“You have to understand that even someone with my talents can’t produce results in a few hours or even a whole day of work. I’ll remind you that my laboratory has been completely destroyed. However, having anticipated this possibility, I procured a second laboratory underground. All my data is protected by at least two layers of security, and so my research has not suffered any setbacks at all.”

Earnest busied herself with washing Eliza’s back. Wow. Look at all this dirt coming off…

“…Okay, so how many days are we talking?” she asked.

“That will depend on how well I can leverage my brilliance. Perhaps a week. Or perhaps a month.”

“All right. Be quick, then. One week. We’re counting on you.”

“H-hey, flattery won’t get you anywhere with me…!”

This girl is so cute, Earnest thought.

“Did you hear that, Claire?” she said, looking up. “One week! Think of this as a little vacation! Have fun with it!”

“Huh? Did you say something?” came the voice from above.

Claire had just picked up one of the male students and laid him down on her shoulder. She had been doing this a lot during bathtime today, the boys constantly begging her for “one more time, one more time!” and never getting sick of it.

“Here goes!” shouted the boy on her shoulder. Then he took off, sliding with a fluid motion down all Claire’s natural curves before splashing into the water.

“Whooo! This is the greatest boob slide ever!”

“…Those stupid kids,” Earnest said, narrowing her eyes.

○Scene IV: Taking On the Super-Being

It all started when someone blurted out:

“You don’t think it’d work, do you?”

The idea was met with universal agreement.

“You think she could win?”

“Oh, she could totally beat him.”

“Claire Mountain’s got what it takes, yeah.”

“She can do it. She can win! It’ll be so easy!”

“You think the human race will finally come out on top?”

“We can finally beat the super-being?!”

And so…

After some hasty renovations, the Second Proving Ground was now large enough to accommodate Claire Mountain. She, along with the rest of the students (including the recently admitted Lunaria), stood together in the arena.

“Um… Blade, I really don’t want to force you into this…”

The fifty-foot-tall giant nervously fidgeted, her multiton ball of divine metal dangling from her hand.

“Mmm,” Blade curtly replied.

“I mean, I know everyone is saying that you have to, but I’m not part of the Super-Being Subjugation Committee or whatever it’s called, so…”

“Mmm.” Another noncommittal reply from Blade. He was holding a plate of katsu curry in one hand and chowing down with the other. “I don’t mind fighting you, but…can you give me a sec? Like, the whole gang dragged me here from the dining hall. I was only on my third helping.”

“Three helpings are plenty. Hurry up and get ready,” Earnest demanded.

“You’re not the boss of me. I haven’t even had a tenth of what you ate, you bottomless pit of an Empress.”

“Whatever, you kid’s meal of a super-being!”

“I’m not a kid’s meal, okay? All I want is to eat my pork and curry in peace.”

“Also, why are you eating a huge meal just before you’re supposed to fight? Are you stupid or something?”

“Oh, right. I guess we won’t be fighting nonstop for a whole week, huh? Maybe I didn’t need to eat so much beforehand.”

“I’m sorry, but I don’t understand you at all. Can you try speaking human for me instead of super-being?”

Blade pointed at Earnest with his spoon. “Hey, Claire! Can you beat this girl to a pulp or something? Pretend it’s a civil engineering project.”

Claire looked down at them with a strained smile. She had spent the past few days living life as a giant, attending lectures from outside the window and remaining totally motionless as she observed her class’s physical training, unable to participate. After school, she’d carefully watch her step as she went to the royal capital to help with this or that civil engineering project—bridge construction and the like.

“Hey, Blade? How about we call this whole thing off?” she said.

“What’s up, Claire? Not feeling it anymore?”

“I mean…like, I’m just worried that if I really tried…you know…”

Claire shot him another strained smile. As she had gotten used to giant life, she had come to understand something. No matter what she did, she always had to hold herself back. She was constantly worried about stepping on something. She couldn’t bust loose and go all out on anything. Once, she’d gone to a remote mountainous region—an uninhabited place where no one would notice if she destroyed a cliff or two—and tried to release some stress. The result? She’d changed the very shape of the mountains.

Over the past week, she’d finally understood what it meant to be a monster. Other people were always treating Blade like a monster, too. But, she thought, I’m sorry. I’m sorry, but I really am a monster right now, all right?

“Okay,” Blade said casually after finishing up his katsu curry, “ready to go?”

“The Proving Ground’s magic barrier is running at full capacity,” announced the Empress. “I want to see a full effort from both of you!”

She must have negotiated with the king. Operating the barrier at that level must have involved moving the entire national budget, but that didn’t matter. Blade could just imagine the king bellowing, I don’t care! I want them both to go hard…and whatever happens, I’ll take full responsibility! And so on.

“Ready? And…go!”

At the signal, Claire raised her mace, now sized to match her enormous frame.

○Scene V: The Blade Approach to Defeating Giant Monsters

“So with a big adversary like this, you want to start…by tripping her up.”

Blade performed a foot sweep on Claire’s legs as he spoke.

“Ow!”

The low kick to her Achilles tendon made Claire stagger forward.

“And then…you do this.”

He tackled his foe, placing all his weight on her pivot leg. Then he grabbed her calf and threw her right over his shoulder.

Craaash!

Claire flew through the air, then landed face first, her body sprawled out on the ground. This wasn’t a feat of pure strength—it was all technique. Blade’s adversary might have been ten times taller and a thousand times heavier than he was, but a little force applied to just the right spot at just the right time was all it took to make the giant lose her balance.

“And once you have her on the ground…”

Blade stood before Claire’s giant face.

“Draaag…”

He was in his Dragon Eater stance.

“…Nnhh!”

Ten times his size or not, Claire was done for if she took an attack like that to the face.

“…Kidding, kidding.” Blade stood back up, then addressed the crowd. “So what do you think? Did you understand? That’s how you take down someone way bigger than you!”

Everyone shook their heads.

“…Huh? What? You didn’t see it clearly? Hmm. Come to think of it, she did kick up a lot of dust when she hit the ground. All right! I’ll show it to you again! Make sure you watch carefully this time, guys!”

Shake, shake, shake.

“C’mon, Claire, stand up.”

Claire was reluctantly brought to her feet. This time, she properly braced herself. She knew what was coming and was determined not to be knocked down again…

But it was useless. She toppled forward, going down even more forcefully than before. She landed right on her face, in fact. Blood poured out of her nose, and she had to wipe it up herself.

Who was it? Who had suggested that being a giant would help her defeat the super-being? It was impossible. Totally impossible. Size didn’t even factor into the equation.

This time, he used a slightly different technique to throw her. The way Blade performed it, the move didn’t raise a single speck of dust into the air.

“So as you can see, size doesn’t really matter that much. If just being big was all it took to win, my business woulda been a lot easier.”

Blade spoke with real conviction, and Claire now understood just how true his words were. He was right. Size didn’t matter. But what “business” was he talking about?

I’m sorry I thought I could beat you. I’m sorry for suggesting we call it off because I might overdo it and hurt you. I won’t do it again. I promise I won’t…

“Okay, Claire, stand up. I have a lot more techniques for fighting giant beasts to show off.”

“A lot…? How many?”

“There are about forty-eight in the basic set.”

“F-forty…?”

“Oh, but don’t worry. That’s just the official list. There are away more, so you can relax!”

“I… I’m not worried, exactly… But I can’t really relax, either…”

“Like, first off, there are the forty-eight shadow techniques that correspond to each official one, right? Then outside of that, you have four families of other skills that correspond to the Four Guardians of the—”

“J-just the official skills, please… But…are you really planning to demonstrate all forty-eight of them? On me?”

“…Oh, right, that’s a fair point. Hey, Cú! Turn into a dragon for me, could you? Some of these skills work better on four-legged beasts.”

“Yaaay! Training with my honored Father!” Cú, the baby magic beast, couldn’t have been more delighted.

“Ahh, how I envy you,” muttered Lunaria. “If only I could become some kind of giant creature, then maybe I could be Blade’s test subject, too. Yes, maybe it’s too soon to give up on that. I’m a genius, after all. If I stay here and watch…maybe I can do it, too.”

Lunaria stared intently at Cú as she transformed.

Unfortunately, even a genius would have a hard time becoming a dragon just from watching.

Claire Mountain, who was neither a magic beast nor a genius, but just a very big person, didn’t feel any joy or envy.

And yet, on that day, she would be defeated twenty-four more times.

I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. I don’t know how I ever thought I could beat a super-being…

○Scene I: Lunch at the Dining Hall

It was one of the busiest times at the dining hall, and Blade sat at his usual table, shoveling katsu curry into his mouth, when an intrusive thought—one besides Mmm! Katsu curry is so damn gooood!!!—entered his mind. He scanned the room, searching for the thought’s source.

He found Lunaria with a plate of food in her hand, her eyes scanning for an empty seat.

“Oh! Hey, Lunaria! Over here!” he called, vigorously waving his spoon in the air at her.

Her presence was undoubtedly the cause of his intrusive thoughts. Either his Hero Ears, Hero Eyes, or maybe even his Hero Sixth Sense had picked up Lunaria’s distress and promptly sent a signal to his subconscious to snap him out of his katsu curry-induced trance.

Lunaria, spotting him, walked up to the table. “Oh… It looks like you’re all full here, too… I’ll look somewhere else.”

“Hmm?”

Blade looked around. Not long ago, this table had been Earnest’s exclusive domain—back when she’d reigned over this school as the Empress, standing tall and proud with her steely eyes. The other students, fearing her wrath, had never dared approach her table. So no matter how busy lunchtime got, Earnest always had the entire space to herself.

Now that Earnest had fallen from her throne, so to speak, that table belonged to what people called Earnest’s Gang—and, apparently, it was full. Considerably over capacity, in fact, given how ten or so people were occupying a table meant for eight.

“Here! Come over here!”

“I’ll pass,” Lunaria replied with the elegant smile of an elite noble. “It already looks pretty full.”

“Nah, nah, here! Over here!” Blade tossed Cú over to Claire and patted the newly empty “seat.”

“You dumbass!” Earnest elbowed him in the temple.

“Hey, that hurt. What was that for?”

“You’re inviting a girl to sit on your lap? What are you, stupid?”

“Cú’s a girl, too, isn’t she? …You are, right?” Blade turned to Cú.

“Yes!” Cú replied. “I’m a girl! A female!”

“Well, Cú’s a different story, isn’t she? And come to think of it, you’re always—”

“Oh… Okay, I’ll move, then. Here you go, Lunaria. Ovie, if you could take Cú…”

Claire politely stood up and passed Cú once again, this time to the Overlord. Those two always got along, perhaps because they were both magic beasts. In fact, they were good friends, and often chatted one-on-one. The Overlord seemed to enjoy looking out for the little dragon, too, calling her the “draconic scion” and so forth.

“I…am quite reluctant to turn down your invitation, Blade. But as a lady, I’m afraid I cannot act so shamelessly in public. And so, Blade, and everyone else…I bid you farewell for now.”

With that, Lunaria left. She eventually found a seat by the window on the opposite end of the dining hall, where she ate all alone.

“Hey, Blade. Hello? Are you listening to me?” The Empress started poking at him again.

At this, Blade finally realized that Earnest had been lecturing him about his behavior this entire time…or, to be more specific, ever since he first invited Lunaria to sit on his lap.

“Are you done yet?” he asked.

“No. No, I’m not done. I still have a lot to say—”

Blade opted not to listen. His Hero Ears could detect a pin dropping miles away, but they could also fully block out loud noises nearby.

Thus, as he ignored Earnest’s ranting and raving, Blade thought some more about Lunaria. After fighting Earnest in a recent interschool competition and bringing her to an epoch-making draw, Lunaria had somehow ended up attending Rosewood Academy. They were calling her a “special exchange student,” and while Blade didn’t really know what that meant, he knew she was his friend—and as long as they were friends, everything else was trivial.

So getting back to the issue at hand, when Blade saw Lunaria eating alone, he had the overwhelming desire to do something about it. And he thought he had a pretty good idea of why she preferred not to interact with others.

“…So that’s the long and short of it, but do you understand what I’m trying to say, Blade?” asked Earnest.

“Yeah, I understand.” In fact, he didn’t understand at all. He hadn’t heard a word she said. But for now, he simply nodded.

“Hey… Are you looking at Lunaria?”

“Yeah. She eats alone a lot, doesn’t she?”

“All the time.”

“I’m worried about her.”

“Why?”

“Because she’s like you used to be. Eating alone.”

“A-alone…? What do you mean? I never found it painful to eat all alone! I never thought even once that I should just take my plate and go eat in a bathroom stall!”

Something about the phrase “eating alone” seemed to have set Earnest off.

“I don’t care about you, all right?” said Blade. “We’re talking about Lunaria.”

“You don’t care…?!”

For a while after that, they ate in silence. Blade would pick up a piece of pork cutlet from the sea of curry in front of him and pop it into his mouth, while Earnest used a large custom-made spoon to hoist a quantity of food much greater than her mouth should be able to hold up to her face. This continued until her trough-sized mountain of fried rice disappeared from sight.

Once she’d finished her fried rice and started on the workman’s bucket of macaroni and cheese next to it, she started speaking again. “Listen. I really don’t think you need to worry about her, okay? She’s always been like that. She’s used to it—geniuses like her need to be. She probably sees herself as a different species from the rest of us ordinary folk anyway.”

“Wow. That’s pretty mean of you,” Blade shot back.

“Huuuh? I-I’m trying to be considerate!”

“No you’re not. Not at all.”

Even someone like Blade, a newcomer to the concept of common sense, could tell that Earnest was being pretty harsh by typical standards. But he couldn’t be sure, so he glanced around at his tablemates. Some nodded their agreement, while others folded their arms and looked generally appalled. These reactions made Blade a lot more confident about his judgment.

“No, with me, it’s…it’s a matter of trust! Right, trust! That disgusting genius—I mean, um, Lunaria’s completely fine with that sort of thing. She’s doing great! How’s the old saying go? It’s always the weeds that grow the tallest! That’s what I mean. That’s the kind of trust I have in her!”

“But geniuses can be pretty fragile, too, right?”

“Huh?”

Earnest stopped eating. Blade fell silent, his eyes still trained on Lunaria as she ate alone on the other side of the room.

○Scene II: At the Proving Ground

Blade’s concern for Lunaria continued for the next several days. Then one afternoon, during their practical training…

“Can you teach me something, Blade?” asked Lunaria.

“Hm?” Blade replied indifferently.

“I’d like to learn some swordplay. I’m trying to find a way to improve and reach the next level, but I feel a little lost right now. I didn’t want to interrupt your meditation, but I thought it’d be a pity to miss this opportunity to learn from you… I can be greedy that way, I suppose.”

Lunaria had taken Blade’s hand as she spoke and moved close enough that she could have punched him. She was oddly talkative.

“You know, Blade?” she said as she began to violently swing his hand.

She seemed strangely affectionate for a change, like Cú when she wanted his attention. (Earnest did it, too, sometimes.)

Blade wondered what Lunaria was up to, then he thought, Oooh. I get it.

“I really wish they would assign us a more competent instructor, at least,” said Lunaria. “The only people I know who could actually teach me anything new are you and General Dione. But the general doesn’t fight with a sword, and you know how her personality is… It’d be less theory and more blood-and-guts action, I think.”

“Well,” Blade said, “if you don’t have anyone to teach you, why don’t you try teaching others?” He looked over at the junior-class students. Of course, Lunaria could have taught the senior class plenty about magic and swordsmanship, too.

“I hadn’t thought of that.” Lunaria put a hand to her mouth, clearly surprised.

She hadn’t, huh? Well, that’s typical Lunaria.

As they were talking, Earnest suddenly came racing over from one corner of the Proving Ground. “Ugh! Come on! You’re always hanging around Blade every chance you get! He’s not your property, you know! Show a little class!”

She pushed her way between the two of them, sticking her arms out on both sides to keep them apart. Why, thought Blade, does she have to get in my way? but then he quickly changed his mind.

“Actually, this is perfect. Earnest, why don’t you join us for a bit?”

“Huh? Me?”

“Yeah. You, me…and Lunaria.”

“Blade, I’m afraid that—”

“Whoa! Blade! Why do I have to—?”

“I mean,” he interrupted, “you’re both at about the same level anyway.”

“Me? A genius? On the same level as this stupid mongrel?!” growled Lunaria.

“Don’t you dare compare me to this annoying little snit, Blade!” spat Earnest.

“And you get along so well,” Blade added.

“How?!”

“In what possible way?!”

“I think you two would work great together!” Blade insisted. “Don’t you agree?”

“What? Me…and Earnest?” asked Lunaria.

“The two of us…against you?” muttered Earnest. “Could we win? You think? Really? I suppose where there’s a will, there’s a way, right?”

“Earnest… All I will say is, you had better not mess this up.”

“That’s my line! If you drag down an ordinary pleb like me, you’d better stop calling yourself a genius.”

The two of them switched gears in an instant. Now they were intensely motivated.

See? You guys are a perfect match. In fact, I bet you’d make one hell of a team.

After all, there was only one person Lunaria trusted besides Blade, and that was Earnest.

“But no scionification, all right? You guys rely way too much on those big moves and raw power.”

Blade didn’t mean to give them a handicap when he said that. Quite the opposite. If he wanted to see them break out their true potential, he had to keep them from leaning too much on their best skills—those were only crutches. He, on the other hand, intended to rein in his spirit, strength, and speed, bringing himself down to the level of an average junior-class student. The katsu curry hadn’t quite settled in his stomach yet, either, and he was just thinking that it was about time for a nice nap in the sun.

If he was mentally asleep and physically at the level of a junior-class student, he’d probably be a good match for the pair of girls giving it their all.

…In the end, it turned out he’d overestimated them a bit.

“Oooooh…”

“I’m sorry… I’m sorry… I, Lunaria…am such a bad girl…”

The two of them were lying stacked on top of each other. The topmost butt seemed like a perfectly placed pillow, so Blade lay down and rested his head on it. It really was about time for a nap.

○Scene III: At the Thermae

“Ah… Nothing like a nice, hot bath after some strenuous exercise, huh?” Earnest raised her arms high and arched her back. Blade watched as her breasts swung up, following her arms. “His Majesty may not be the sanest man around, but when it comes to baths, he’s got a real good head on his shoulders.”

Blade remembered how much Earnest had whined about the bath’s mixed-gender policy at first, but she’d probably forgotten all about that by now.

“You should be more respectful, Anna,” Claire said with a troubled smile.

“What? What do you mean, Claire? More respectful? How so? Toward whom?”

Once upon a time, Earnest would immediately chastise anyone who acted even remotely disrespectful toward the king. She probably didn’t remember that, either.

“That aside, even with Anna and Lunaria working together, they still don’t stand a chance, huh?”

Blade shifted his gaze from Claire’s shapely breasts to Yessica’s slightly firmer ones. Lately, his eyes seemed strangely drawn to women’s breasts, though he wasn’t sure why.

“I got pretty excited today. I mean, it was the first time Anna and Lunaria fought together, you know? Usually, they’re constantly slashing and swinging at each other, whether it’s in the Proving Ground or just some hallway.”

“Hey! We don’t do it all the time, Yessica,” Earnest protested. “It’s only about once a week.”

“Yeah, right. More like once every three days. Or maybe every other day? …What do you think, Sophie?”

“I don’t know,” she replied. “I never tried counting.”

“Allow me, with my high specs, to be of assistance,” Iona said, cutting in. “I can provide statistical data accurate to any number of decimal places.”

Blade shifted his eyes away from Sophie’s small breasts and toward Iona’s large ones.

“So…how was it?” asked Yessica.

“Oooh… It was good, hee-hee-hee,” Earnest replied.

Their conversation was beginning to sound lewd, as conversations between girls sometimes did, but they were still just talking about Earnest’s team-up with Lunaria.

“Can I join in next time?” asked Yessica. “Maybe we could beat him as a threesome. Or is that still not enough?”

“According to my calculations, not even an eightsome would be enough to satisfy my master,” stated Iona.

“Wow. That’s pretty amazing.”

Blade could swear there was nothing suggestive about this topic at all. They were simply discussing how many people it would take to defeat him.

Which eight would it be, though? Earnest, Lunaria, Yessica, Claire, Sophie, the Overlord, Iona…and who else? Oh, right, Eliza was in the mix, too. If they all worked together, and Blade was still half asleep like before, then yeah, maybe they could beat him. He had once taken on the king’s guard, which was a twelvesome or even a thirteensome, and managed to hold out for an hour or so. With his current 18 percent limit, that was the best he could do, no matter how much he exerted himself. The king’s guard, after all, were active semi-champions.

But as he thought of all these trivial details, Blade began to feel a little lonely. He simply didn’t have enough breasts. If Iona’s are large, then there must be an extra-large pair somewhere out there that surpass even them…

“Hmm? What’re you looking at, Blade? You should try listening to us. We’re talking about how to defeat you—” Earnest stopped talking once she realized what Blade was looking at. Lunaria, alone in the distance, was soaking in the water. “Ah… Hey, where are you going?”

Blade stood up and walked away, his back to Earnest.

“Oh… Blade?”

Lunaria greeted him with her gentle gaze. Then she scooped up some water with her palm and poured it across her shoulders. It flowed down her body, gathering between her breasts.

Yeah. She definitely has the largest breasts. Extra-large, even.

Recently, Blade was starting to understand why all the boys were always looking at her breasts.

“I am sorry I failed to live up to your expectations earlier,” said Lunaria. “That barbarian girl was dragging me down, you see. If I could have another round of special nighttime coaching, I’m certain that I could progress another one or two levels in no time.”

“Special nighttime coaching” wasn’t anything particularly suggestive. It simply referred to a special training regimen, and last time, it had been a brutal massacre. Blade had killed Lunaria over and over again—and thanks to that, she had become used to dying (at least, for the time being).

“Just dying won’t help you improve by leaps and bounds any more, you know.”

“Oh? Then what kind of especially harsh training would you assign me?”

“Hmm… Well, you’ll see in time,” said Blade, keeping things vague. But that wasn’t why he’d come over here. “By the way, I had something I wanted to ask you.”

“Please, ask me anything you want. I’ll even tell you where you can find the moles on my body, if you’d like. Why wouldn’t I? Once you become my partner, you will learn everything there is to know about me.”

“Um. Moles? That doesn’t matter.”

“I-it doesn’t…?” Lunaria slumped over, dejected.

It seemed like this conversation was about to crash and burn, and Blade wasn’t sure why. The moles on her body? Really? Why is that important?

“But listen, I wanted to ask… Do you like being alone?”

“Huh? What do you mean?”

“Well, it seems like you’re always off by yourself. You eat alone, you train alone… I guess you were with Earnest today, but still. You’re even alone in the bath, aren’t you?”

“…I’m with you right now,” Lunaria said. Her cheeks were slightly flushed. Was the water too hot for her?

“No, that’s not what I mean. That doesn’t matter.”

“I-it doesn’t…?” Lunaria was shocked once again.

Apparently, “that doesn’t matter” was one of her trigger phrases. Blade made a mental note.

“I just mean, like, are you alone because you want to be? Or would you rather have company?”

With Cú, Blade had made a bunch of assumptions, and that led to a lot of big mistakes. Dragons generally preferred solitude, so Blade had figured Cú would be the same. But she’d actually been suppressing her desire to make friends with everybody, and he’d only found that out later, much to his regret. There was no way he’d let himself make the same mistake twice.

“So what’s the deal? Are you a table-for-one kind of girl, or are you full of anguish and secretly longing to be part of the group?”

“‘A-anguish’…? I’m not sure I like either of those choices.”

“Which is it?”

“Do I have to give an answer?”

“Yeah. That’s an order.”

Huh? Wait, isn’t that how I usually deal with Sophie? I guess it works on Lunaria, too.

“W-well, what can I do, really? The only people I consider my equals are you and that girl. Though I suppose that girl is closer to a snail crawling around at my feet. Hee-hee… It may not look as if it’s moving, but if you watch closely, you’ll notice it crawling forward a few inches. Then if you look away, it’ll be three feet down the trail before you know it… You know what snails are, right?”

“Sure. They’re real tasty.”

“Huh?”

Blade used to eat them as a snack during extended field battles. But back to the point… “So what’s your answer?”

“My answer?”

“Yes or no?”

“Didn’t I just tell you?”

“You’re not making sense. Sure, snails make great snacks, but that isn’t what I was asking.”

“Okay, um… I’ll try to be a bit clearer.”

“Right.”

“Well… So, like…”

“Yes?”

“I mean…”

“You mean?”

“Um…”

“Um?” Blade waited patiently.

Then Lunaria began to speak. She sounded very, very shy. “I…I’d like some friends…”

○Scene IV: Operation Make-a-Friend

“You can leave this to me, all right?” said Cú, snorting with pride. “I’m a master. I’ve got tons of experience!”

After getting out of the bath, Blade had returned to his dorm room with Cú and Lunaria. Currently, Lunaria was busy using a towel to dry the young dragon’s hair.

“Um…don’t you have an attendant, Blade?” she asked.

“Who are you, some kinda princess?”

Even an ex-Hero like Blade could tell what she was driving at. She probably saw drying hair as servant work. Not a lick of common sense, this girl.

Come to think of it, Blade had once saved a princess from another kingdom, and she’d said pretty much the same thing. They’d been in a vast wilderness, and she’d glanced all around, saying, “didn’t you bring any servants with you?” Getting her back home had been incredibly stressful.

“I’m the world’s foremost authority when it comes to inter-species exchange!” Cú declared. “And the advice I have for you is…pay more attention to meeeee! Once you’re done drying my hair, next you gotta roll it up and tease it all out, okay?”

“I don’t understand what you mean,” said Lunaria.

“She can’t sleep unless she’s clinging to something,” Blade explained. “Just pat her on the back a few times, and she’ll pass right out.”

“She will…?”

Lunaria had never taken care of such a young girl before. Ever so cautiously, she combed Cú’s hair, lay down beside her, and gently tapped her back.

“Hold me,” said the dragon.

“Um, all right… Like this?”

“Now pat me.”

“Um…is this okay?”

“Zzzzzzz…”

“Whoa! That was fast! But…are you sure this plan of hers is going to work, Blade?”

“Don’t worry. Just let my beloved daughter take care of things. She’s an expert.”

Blade winked at Lunaria, but she was too entangled in Cú’s arms to move.

○Scene V: Take Me On!

“Take me on!”

Cú stood, arms folded, in the middle of the hallway. Lunaria followed suit. Blade, acting as her cornerman, also had his arms folded for some reason.

“Huh? Who? Me?”

The first victim who happened to pass by was Kassim. He pointed at himself and looked around. Nobody else was in sight.

“What do you mean, ‘take me on’? I don’t really like my chances here…”

“It doesn’t have to be a fight,” explained Cú. “Any kind of contest will work. Just do whatever you’re best at, Kassim.”

“What I’m best at? Anything?”

“Anything.”

“Um… Okay. Then how about a contest to see who can make a girl fall in love with them the fastest?”

“Booo! That’s what you want to be best at, not what you are best at. And you’re never going to get what you want, Kassim!”

“Whoa! Stop being so mean! What am I good at, then?”

“Oh, I know. You’re really good at guessing girls’, um, ‘measurements’!”

“Huh? That’s what you want to take me on with?”

“What are mine, Kassim?”

“Twenty-six, twenty, twenty-eight.”

“You’re right! What about Lunaria?”

“Thirty-eight, twenty-two, thirty-six.”

“Wha—…?!” Lunaria blushed and tried to cover up her body. The reaction seemed to indicate that Kassim was right.

Blade couldn’t help but be impressed. As an ex-Hero, he also had the uncanny ability to gauge an opponent’s fighting skill with a single glance. Kassim’s skills were, in their own way, a great technique for gauging a woman’s prowess.

“Why are you so surprised?” Kassim asked Lunaria.

He was dumbfounded. The man was completely unaware of what he was capable of, totally oblivious to the greatness of his achievement. His lack of awareness was even more impressive than the skill itself. He couldn’t have been more of a natural. A true talent, thought Blade, deeply moved, is something you’re not even aware of.

“…All right! That’ll be our competition, then,” Lunaria declared. “Hmph! I’m a genius, you know. I can see a technique like yours just once and copy it at will! I’m not some fake, you know!”

And with that, the competition began.

Girls comprised around half of the academy’s student body. Between them, the king’s guard, the dining hall staff, and so on, the final results came like this:

Kassim: Sixty-five correct out of sixty-five.

Lunaria: Five correct out of sixty-five (four suspected cases of cheating due to already knowing the target’s measurements).

The genius just couldn’t hack it. Even after seeing Kassim pull off the move sixty-five times, she still couldn’t figure it out. She was all bark and no bite.

“Well…you beat me,” she said.

“I can’t say I’m overjoyed about winning a fight like this… Can I go now?”

“Sure thing. Thanks.”

Blade waved good-bye to Kassim. Right up to the end, he remained fully unaware of his own awesomeness. Perhaps guessing the size of the girls’ breasts had reduced his rating among them by tens of thousands of points, but since that rating had started out at zero and remained zero, nothing had really changed.

“I lost… A—a genius like me…” Luna was on all fours, unable to stand up.

“C’mon, pull yourself together!” said Blade. “The next competition awaits!”

“Huh? The next one…? Wait… I’m still tasting this first bitter defeat…”

“You need to lose to a hundred and eight people. We don’t have time to mess around!”

“Huh? What? One hundred and eight people…?”

Lunaria, unable to rise, wound up letting Blade drag her away by her skirt and panties.

“Huh? Something I’m good at?”

Lunaria’s next opponent was Clay. He folded his arms and hemmed and hawed for a while. People often considered themselves a whiz at something they weren’t actually that skilled in. In fact, it was often something they were particularly bad at. In the end, the thing they thought they were good at was simply a thing they wished they’d be good at in the future.

…Blade knew that, but he thought he’d give it a shot and ask.

“Right, yeah.” Clay slapped his palm with a fist and flashed Blade a defiant grin. “I know. I can make mud balls that’re really, really hard.”

“What’re mud balls?”

“What are they?” Lunaria asked, joining in.

“Tell me, Clay!” Apparently, Captain Cú didn’t know, either.

“What…? Didn’t you ever play in the mud as a kid?” Clay made it sound like everyone knew about these mysterious objects.

“Of course not,” said Blade. “I’m pretty sure I didn’t have anything close to a normal childhood!”

“Not exactly a noble child’s pastime, is it…?” said Lunaria.

“Not a dragon’s, either!”

“Oh. Sorry. My bad. I…I’m sorry, I guess.” Clay sounded sincere in his apology.

“Why don’t you just tell me what they are?” asked Blade.

“Right!” agreed Lunaria. “I don’t know what kind of competition this is, but if you can give me a demonstration, that’s all I’ll need! I’m a genius, after all!”

“Yeaaah! Let’s plaaay!” agreed Cú.

“All right. In that case…we’ll want some good sand and soil.” Clay said, looking around.

“Soil? What? You mean soil soil? A genius playing in the soil?” Lunaria was aghast.

“Yeah!” Blade exclaimed, already excited.

“Right! Yeaaah!” agreed Cú.

“Okay, here we go!” shouted Clay.

“Whoa… Wait a minute!” shrieked Lunaria. “That one’s shining like a marble! You’re cheating!”

Thud!

“Ha-ha! It went ‘thud!’” said Blade.

“Thuuud!” Cú repeated.

Everyone threw their mud balls at each other. Clay’s were as shiny and black as obsidian—clearly the toughest of them all. He easily crushed the other three competitors.

“Ah-ha-ha-ha! I lost!” Blade cried with a belly laugh.

“I lost!” shouted Cú. “Clay! That was amazing! Ahhh! Give me a big hug!”

“I…I give up… I lost again… A genius like me…”

Blade and Cú were enjoying every minute of the competition. Lunaria, meanwhile, was on her hands and knees in the sand, depressed again.

“Right, see you later, Clay!” said Blade.

“You bet! You can take me on anytime! The champion’s always ready for a challenge!”

“Okay, next! A hundred and six more to go!” Blade grabbed Lunaria by the skirt and panties and dragged her along behind him.

“Ugh… I-I’m sick of losing… Geniuses aren’t meant to lose…”

Blade ignored her muttering and mercilessly dragged her away. There were 106 people to go, and only after she had lost to all of them would he hear her out.

○Scene VI: The Defeat

She came, she saw, she lost—and lost, and lost, and lost.

She lost to the Military Nerd. This one guy at the academy knew everything about every weapon from every country in the land—not just the numerical specs, but the years they were adopted and the history of all their model upgrades. As a genius honor student destined to become a general in the future, Lunaria knew the basics about that sort of thing, but she was no match for this master.

She lost to the Cicada King. That was the nickname given to a guy who could snatch cicadas off trees with only a quick flick of his arm. Blade got the hang of it before too long, but Lunaria’s lack of intuition meant she wound up with a hand full of cicada pee and not much else.

She lost to the Bargain Hunter. There was a ruthless world out there, where shoppers constantly vied to obtain the lowest price, down to the smallest possible denomination. And in that world, raw genius didn’t get you anywhere.

“Okay, so you’re the last one,” said Blade, dragging Lunaria over to Earnest.

“Huh? What? I heard rumors that you were up to something weird again, but…what do you want from me?”

“Whatever you’re good at. Anything you think you can win.”

“Whatever I’m good at? But Luna’s kind of…a genius, so…”

“Yes! Yes, I’m a genius!” Lunaria cut in. “There’s no way a genius like me could lose to a barbarian girl like her! I could never!”

Suddenly, Lunaria was back to life. She’d been unable to walk moments before, but now she was standing strong, glaring at Earnest.

“How about an eating contest?” suggested Blade.

“Huh?”

“Eep…!” Lunaria gasped. The color drained from her face. “No,” she whispered. “Anything but that…”

“Okay, how about some kind of endurance contest? Because I’m pretty good at that, too.” Earnest accentuated this declaration with a cheerful laugh, looking quite proud of herself. “Pain, heat, spicy peppers, itching, tickling… Anything goes. Which one do you want?”

“Nooooo!” Lunaria let out a high-pitched scream.

Earnest had a well-earned reputation as a monster. When she said “endurance,” exactly what sort of hellish gauntlet was she suggesting they endure? It was easy to imagine her saying okay, we’ll start with this only for everyone to go insane three seconds into the first round. Anything she came up with was bound to be “nightmare mode.” Not even the ex-Hero thought he could beat Earnest in that department. Forget it. It was just too terrifying.

And as for the genius girl…

“Ahhhh! Nooooo! I hate pain! I hate itching! Nooo… I forfeit! Forfeit! Fooorfeiiit…!”

Then she kicked her shoes off and ran away at full speed—literally sprinting barefoot. She had fled from the enemy before the fight even began. And so, her final match against Earnest proved the most humiliating of all.

○Scene VII: Friends…?

It was the morning rush hour in the dining hall.

“Um…g-good morning.”

“Ah, good morning, Lunar!”

“‘L-Lunar’…?”

A girl sitting at the far end of the junior-class section was calling Lunaria by a new nickname. Lunaria looked around, confused.

She’d lost to this particular girl in a game of cat’s cradle. She might’ve been a genius who could learn how to loop strings at a single glance, but her opponent kept breaking out new techniques, and in the end, she just couldn’t keep up. Even a genius like her had no choice but to admit defeat.

“Want a sausage?” asked another student.

“Um… Yes. One.”

“Here you go, then. One sausage.”

“Th-thank you…”

People were calling out to Lunaria from all directions, and just replying to them kept her extremely busy. At first, her eyes would spin at every new nickname, but before long, she was able to smile and give a cheerful “good morning!” ♪ to each one.

Blade, waiting for the right moment, stepped up and slapped her on the back. “Looks like you’re having fun.”

“Huh? Um… N-no, that’s not it…” She quickly erased her girlish smile and put on her usual “cool genius” smirk instead. “Not at all. They might have challenged me using pointless skills that are of no use to anyone, but I still lost. I couldn’t beat any of them…and so I’ve come to accept them all.”

Her voice was calm. There was no bravado, no sour grapes, no sarcasm. She was simply accepting the truth as it stood.

“So you finally see them all as human beings, right?” asked Blade.

“Ugh, stop harassing me, please! I’ve always recognized all of you as people.”

“But up till now, in your world, there were only two humans. Me and Earnest. Just us two.”

“Oh? If I may, Blade, you’re not a human. You’re a super-being.”

“Stop calling me that!”

Blade stamped his feet. She certainly had him there. How frustrating. And just when he had something really cool to say, too!

“But…yes, you’re right. There are so many people with skills I could never match…”

“It’s not just these guys, either, you know. Everyone in this city, whether they can fight or not, is amazing, without exception. They all have something you can’t beat them at.”

Blade was sure of it. He knew that as a Hero. That was why Heroes fought.

“You might have been the only one in your world before now, but that’s not true anymore, right? Now your world’s full of people.”

“Y-yes…” Lunaria opened her eyes wide and looked around. “You’re right…”

There was a sparkle in her saucerlike eyes. Eventually, it crystallized and began dripping down her cheeks.

“Huh? No… No, I… Why am I crying? Don’t look! Blade, don’t look at me!”

Lunaria tried to hold back the tears, but they only gained momentum and began pouring rather than dripping.

“Ahh! You made her cry! You made her cryyy!”

This sudden accusation from everyone in the dining hall, sung in unison, greatly vexed Blade.

“No! I didn’t make her cry! She started crying on her own!”

“I’m not crying! I’m not crying at all! Geniuses don’t cry! I’d never show my tears in front of everyone like this! Hey! I said I’m not crying!”

“You made her cry! You made her cry! Meanie! Meanie!”

“No! I didn’t do anything! I was being normal! Normal! I swear!”

“Stop it! I told you I’m not crying! This is just sweat coming from my heart!”

The chorus of accusations, Blade’s excuses, and Lunaria’s denials continued on and on.

○Scene I: Morning

“Come on! How much longer are you gonna sleep? You’re so stupid, Blade! Get up!”

It was a typical morning, albeit slightly noisier than usual. Blade, awakened by Earnest’s voice, pulled his sheets closer to him, looking annoyed.

“Mmmph, five more minutes.”

“No!”

The request was denied. Earnest was always grumpy like that.

“Dude… You’re so loud…”

Blade pulled his sheets even closer, retracting into them like a turtle into its shell. Sleeping through the morning—or to be exact, just five more minutes—was a luxury he was never allowed during his Hero days.

“What’re you talking about? You should be honored to have Earnest, your cool, ravishing friend, who you’ve known since kindergarten, come here to wake you up every day! Start whining, and I’ll have the whole school beat you up!”

Is it really okay for a girl to call herself “ravishing” like that? Also, since when has she been my friend since kindergarten? What is she talking about?

“So hurry up and get downstairs! Cú’s already up!”

Come to think of it, Cú was missing. Usually, she was still sleeping when he got up. She was already awake?

“Move it! Your mom and dad are waiting at the table!”

Earnest’s voice faded and he heard her pattering down the stairs. Wait. Were the stairs always that close by? And…“mom and dad”?

Blade’s eyes shot open. He got up, looked around, and quickly grew bewildered.

…Where am I?

The ceiling looked just as unfamiliar as the rest of the room. And…actually, Earnest was wearing a different outfit from usual. Instead of her classic academy dress, Empress version, she was wearing some other uniform he didn’t recognize.

…What’s going on?

As Blade headed down the nearby staircase, he noticed the building felt strangely cramped.

“Morning, Blade,” said the king. He was wearing a bathrobe and reading a newspaper.

“Morning, sleepyhead. Bread or rice?”

This question was posed…by Sirene. She was standing in a small kitchen wearing an apron, exuding a maternal aura.

“Um…what?” Blade asked, confused.

“What is it, Blade? Aren’t you going to say good morning back to your beloved father?”

“What? No, um…”

Blade blinked helplessly. “Beloved” or not…since when was the king his father?

“Mornin’, bro!”

“Y-yeah, uh… Morning.”

Cú’s pigtails swung as she greeted him. Something was odd about her as well. She was wearing a school uniform. Dragons like her didn’t wear clothes. What looked like clothes was actually just their body markings or changes in the texture of their skin.

“You better get ready, honey,” said Sirene. “You have an important meeting today.”

“Yes, yes, I know,” replied the king.

“Ha-ha-ha! Mommy’s bossing Daddy around again!” said Cú.

“Oh, no, we always get along, don’t we, dear?”

“Heh! We get along even better when you kids aren’t looking.”

King Dad used his hand to stroke Mommy Sirene’s butt. She slapped it away.

“You’re free to come by whenever you want, Earnest,” Mommy Sirene said with a gentle smile. “Have a meal with us sometime.”

“No way! Ugh! I don’t have any interest in Blade! He’s such an idiot!”

Blade had about a dozen question marks above his head, but for now, he needed to recharge. So he stuffed himself with bread, scrambled eggs, and bacon. It was vital to eat when you had the opportunity. You never knew if it would be your last meal for the next few weeks or even longer. That much was common sense in the Hero business.

○Scene II: The Classroom

“Blade? Still sleepy? Are you feeling all right?”

On the way to school, Earnest, Blade’s friend since kindergarten, shot him a worried look. Her face was way too close for comfort, so he blushed a bit and turned away.

“What, I’m not allowed to worry about you?” she asked. “That’s forbidden, too?”

She was acting unusually reserved, her usual ferociousness mysteriously absent. It made her seem like a completely different person.

“I’m fine. I mean it,” Blade reassured her. “I’m just groggy. I think I had a super-realistic dream. That’s why I thought you were—”

“I was what?” She tilted her head, her bouncy red hair cascading down from her oval-shaped head. “You thought I was what? Tell me! Now I’m all curious.”

“No way. Never.” Blade turned away. Her face was just too close to his.

Eventually, they arrived at their classroom. It was a very small space, crammed with thirty or so people—a bizarre sight.

“Doing okay, Blade?” asked Earnest again.

“Oh… Yeah. I’m fine.”

After a few moments, his unease began to fade. He’d felt the same way in the living room of his house that morning, when he had seen the king—sorry, his father—and mother having breakfast. It felt weird at first, but after a few seconds, it all felt normal again.

“Hey, Blade.”

“What’s up, Kassim?”

Blade and Kassim fist-bumped each other. They were good friends—more like partners in crime, actually.

“Hey,” Kassim whispered, “so I brought something really cool with me today. I’ll let you borrow it later.”

“Something cool?” Blade replied at a normal volume. “What is it?”

“Whoa! Keep your voice down! Shhhhh!”

“Come on, Kassim!” shouted Maria, the class president. “Stop being a bad influence on Blade. You’re on class duty today. Go wipe down the blackboard.”

“I know!” Kassim said, reluctantly picking up the blackboard eraser.

There was some graffiti on the board reading BLADE ♡ EARNEST in big letters. What could that mean?

“Good morning, Blade.” A smiling girl approached him, her beautiful black hair swaying gently. “Did you do your homework?”

“Huh? Homework?” What’s that?

“There’s no way,” replied Earnest with absolute certainty.

“Well, um, I could show you mine if you want…,” said the smiling girl. “I know I shouldn’t, but I’ll make a special exception for today.”

“Oh, really?” asked Blade. “That’d be great.”

“Whoa, me too, Claire! Lemme see!”

“Do your own homework, Yessica.”

“Hey, no fair! Why’re you only helping Blade?”

“Because he’s special!”

“Oh wow! She said it! She really said it!”

“N-no, wait, I didn’t mean it like that! I didn’t! Ahhh!”

“What do you mean by ‘that,’ huh?”

Blade quietly excused himself from the gaggle of girls. His best friend, Clay, was motioning for him to come over, so he grabbed his notebook and started to move. But just then, someone interrupted him.

“Sir! Sir, sir, sir! Please pick me, your high-spec underclassman! With my super-advanced technology, acing quizzes from the year above me is child’s play!”

“Dude, go back to your class.”

It was his annoying underclassman again. She was a year Blade’s junior, but she tried hard to ingratiate herself with everyone in his class for some reason. And she stuck to Blade like glue. She was such a nuisance.

“Hey,” said a student stationed at the door, “teacher’s coming.”

Blade hadn’t finished copying Clay’s homework yet. Five seconds left… Three seconds… One second… Yes! He was done, and just in the nick of time. He didn’t have a chance to give Clay a celebratory high five, but he quickly sat back down at his desk, the very picture of good manners.

“Good morning, students. It’s a lovely day outside, isn’t it?”

Ms. Dione, their homeroom teacher, was popular with the whole class—both boys and girls. You could call her backside “muscular,” and she wouldn’t yell at you for it; her booty was all but bulging through her suit, after all. Her smile was so gentle and free of malice, it was almost frightening.

“Hey, Blade,” said Earnest, sitting next to him. “What’re you looking at?”

“Her ass and legs,” Blade replied succinctly. He leaned to one side of his desk, trying to get a better look at her from across the teacher’s podium. He couldn’t stop thinking about Ms. Dione’s bottom half. For some strange reason, the fact that she had only two legs felt weird to him.

Why, though? How many would she have otherwise?

“So!” Ms. Dione began. “I have some very good news for everyone—especially for the boys.”

The male students began to buzz with excitement.

“As of today, we’re going to have a new student in our class. Come on in!”

At Ms. Dione’s cue, a girl entered the classroom.

“My name is Sophie…,” she said. “I just transferred here.”

The quiet girl bowed slightly, and the boys all hooted in unison. Nearly half of the girls cheered as well, while the other half gave the boys harsh, judgmental stares. Blade, being a normal boy, whooped it up with the others.

He was a few seconds behind the rest of the class, though, because he still wasn’t sure what they were yelling about. Nobody noticed, though. And although she was being showered with praise and encouragement, the new transfer remained bolt upright, her expression neutral.

○Scene III: Lunch Break

“Hey, hey, so what was your old school like?!”

“What kind of music do you listen to?!”

“What’s your favorite manga?!”

“What kinda guys do you like?!”

“We should follow each other!”

The bell rang, signaling the end of fourth period, and as the teacher’s back disappeared through the doorway, the entire class rushed toward the new transfer student.

“Atten-shun!” A loud voice rang out, and at the Empress’s command, everyone fell silent. “Enough! Stop it, everyone. You’re giving Sophie a hard time. I’m really sorry everyone in class is so stupid.”

“It’s okay,” said the girl. She was as cool as ever and didn’t seem to mind. “I can’t talk about my last school, though. It’s against the rules. I don’t listen to music, but I’ll listen to whatever you suggest to me. I like BL manga. I’m not sure what kind of boy I like, but something about useless, clumsy guys makes me feel very maternal. And sorry, but I’m not on social media. I don’t even have a flip phone.”

One by one, she answered every question hurled at her. Everyone was impressed, oohing and aahing. Blade didn’t understand why what she’d said would elicit that sort of reaction, but he went along with the crowd.

“Ohhh…?”

Soon, everyone split into groups and started eating lunch. Sophie, the transfer student, stood alone, looking a bit lost.

“…What’s wrong?” asked Blade.

“I didn’t bring lunch.”

“Oh. Well, there’s food at the cafeteria.”

“Ah,” she replied, not moving an inch.

“…Are you gonna go?”

“I don’t know where it is.”

Oh. Well, that makes sense. It’s her first day here… But this girl’s incredibly passive, isn’t she? Ask her something, and she just answers. She’s almost too honest, but I guess she won’t say anything unless she’s prompted.

She clearly had a problem—she didn’t know where the cafeteria was—and yet she refused to ask anyone. Instead, she just stood there.

“Here, I’ll walk you over.”

I’ll be this girl’s ally, Blade thought. Even if it means turning the whole world against me. It wasn’t a decision so much as a realization—a fact he was now absolutely sure of.

“This way. Follow me.”

“If it’s an order, then I’ll obey.”

Not all the students brought lunchboxes, and those who didn’t got their food from the cafeteria. It wasn’t free, though, or even all-you-can-eat. You had to pay for everything, even a single piece of bread, which felt kind of weird to Blade. Regardless, they had daily specials, set meals, assorted side dishes, and plenty of other things to fill the students’ stomachs. To Blade and his classmates, the neat lines of small dishes, including croissants and other treats, seemed to literally sparkle.

“Hey, ma’am, um… This sandwich… I think it’d be perfect if you just added a little curry.”

“Ha-ha-ha-ha! You have to be the first student to ever ask me to put curry in a pork cutlet sandwich. But sure! I’ll try that next time! Maybe I can make it into a croquette, so the curry won’t drip out.”

The lunch lady rolled up a sleeve and flexed to accentuate her point. Blade had just offered the idea on a whim, but it seemed he’d really inspired her. Would there be a new item on the menu the following day? He couldn’t wait to find out.

“So what kind of food are you hungry for?” Blade asked Sophie.

“Anything is fine.”

“You can choose whatever you want.”

“Is that an order?”

“Not an order, no… But it’d be nice if you chose something you want, Sophie.”

“I’m sorry. I don’t have any preference. I’m not sure what I like or dislike, exactly.”

“Then let’s try them all,” said Blade. “Hey, ma’am, give us every type of baked good you have!”

“Ha-ha-ha-ha! You better clean your plate, kid!”

“Don’t you worry about that!”

And so, Blade grabbed one of each baked good from right to left and held them all in his arms. Sophie’s eyes widened ever so slightly at the sight. The change was barely noticeable, but somehow, Blade could sense her surprise.

Their spoils were now lined up on the courtyard lawn.

“So which ones do you want?”

“Choose whatever you like, Blade. I’ll eat the rest.”

Blade grinned. Sophie was certainly staying in character. But he didn’t want to just repeat their exchange from earlier.

“Okay, I’ll take this pork sandwich and the curry bread.”

Those two things made up half of his diet. He picked them up, then handed everything else to Sophie. She took each item, looked at it, then put it back. Finally, she chose one.

“Ugh… What’s that?” asked Blade.

“It’s called a ‘fruit sandwich,’ apparently.”

It was a truly demonic item: two pieces of bread with what looked like a good two inches of whipped cream between them. If there was any fruit in there, it was buried in the ocean of cream—more of a shortcake than a sandwich.

“…Should I choose something else?” asked Sophie hesitantly.

“N-no, um… I-if you want it, Sophie…then I’m sure it’s g-great. Totally fine… Perfect, even…”

“Are you sure?”

Asked a second time, Blade simply nodded and encouraged her to have at it.

They ate silently for a little while, munching away at their selections. Blade scarfed down a bread pocket full of yakisoba noodles and some kind of meat, while Sophie went to town on a sandwich with cream, sweet bean paste, and fruit.

Sophie seemed to have quite the sweet tooth. Blade hadn’t known that about her. Girls tended to like sweets, he supposed, and Sophie was a girl. She was, wasn’t she? This felt like a very fresh discovery, like it had just dawned on him for the first time.

After finishing his last item, Blade licked his fingers…and then lay down, his head resting right on Sophie’s thigh.

“Huh?” Sophie let out a surprised yelp. It seemed out of character for her.

“This is fine, right?” Blade asked.

“I don’t mind,” Sophie said.

So Blade decided to take a nap on Sophie’s lap, there on the soft grass. The sun was shining, the air was a pleasant temperature, and Sophie’s lap was just as warm—maybe a little sweaty, even. Blade was completely relaxed. The scene was almost too peaceful. He was just enjoying his normal, happy life…

This is nice. I like this. A lot. In fact, I could die happy right now.

The moment was so peaceful and pleasant, Blade couldn’t help himself. But it was always the Hero’s job to make it back home alive. Being a Hero didn’t mean you were the strongest fighter in the world. It simply meant that you always made it through, no matter how tough the battlefield.

And that was exactly what Blade was: a Hero.

“Sir, sir, sir!” His annoying underclassman was back. She came running up to him, shouting the whole way. “I’ll switch in, I’ll switch in! I demand to switch in! If you need a lap, I’ll provide it! Please enjoy my high-spec thighs at once! Sir! Sir! Sir, sir, sir, sir!”

“Shut up.” Blade grabbed the back of her green hair and pulled hard, slamming her face into the grass.

“Whoa…! Blade?! Blade, stop! I don’t care how annoying Iona is—you can’t do that! That’s awful!”

Earnest, who must have been hiding around the corner, jumped out and started shouting.

“What?” Blade asked, still holding Iona’s head against the grass. She flailed her arms and legs, but eventually, her movements changed to convulsive twitches. Even then, Blade didn’t let up. He buried her face deeper and deeper into the dirt.

“She’s gonna die! You’re gonna kill her!” shouted Earnest.

“No, she won’t. She’s not even real.” Blade knew it. He knew she wouldn’t die.

“Blade… What’s wrong?” Sophie stared at him blankly.

Blade shook his head. “I’m sorry, Sophie. It’s been fun. I was happy. I never thought I could have a life as normal as this. And that’s exactly what tipped me off to the fact that this world is completely fabricated.”

“But…”

“I wish I could stay here forever. I really do…but I have to go back. I have things I have to do.”

“What…? Blade? What’re you talking about?”

“You were an illusion, too, huh, Earnest? I’ve always wanted a childhood friend.”

“Hey…guys? Is Blade acting weird, or is it just me? Did something break in his head?”

“Haaah…”

Blade began to build up spirit. Among humans, only Heroes had access to this unique breathing technique, devised to refine one’s spirit and restructure it to resist visual illusions.

“Haaaaaaaaaaaah…”

“Huh? Hey, Blade? What’s going on? What’re you doing?”

Earnest looked confused. Blade regretted leaving her with that expression. But as brutal as his world was, he had to go back to it. He had to return to his life as a Hero.

“Haaaaaaaah!”

His spirit surged higher and higher. If you had someone in the real world that you wanted to kill but couldn’t, you could instead trap them in an illusion and do the deed there. Others had tried it on Blade dozens of times, and over the years, he had devised certain methods of escape.

“Haaah!”

His spirit grew and grew, and cracks appeared in the space around him. Finally, with a great shattering sound, the illusion burst, and light from reality poured through.

Blade passed through the hole and emerged outside. He had returned to the real world.

○Scene IV: In the Real World

“…Huh?”

Blade was sure he’d left the illusion, but not much had changed. There was still a soft lawn, the sun gently shining down upon it. He saw no sign of any illusionist attempting to trap him.

He was prepared to cut down any nearby enemies, but none came, so he relaxed. He removed the contact pad stuck to his forehead and threw it aside. The limp bodies of the other students littered the ground around him. They all had pads stuck to their foreheads, just like he did.

…Wait. Everyone? Wasn’t that all the enemy’s illusion? Having lots and lots of friends around me… Could it be…?

Instead of spending his days killing or being killed, he could sleep through class and look forward to pork and curry sandwiches for lunch. But that was all a happy illusion prepared for him by the enemy…wasn’t it?

“Ugh! Why’d you leave…? How’d you even figure it out? You realize this is why people call you a super-being, right?”

“Huh? …Earnest? You’re here?”

“Yes, that’s right—I’m Earnest, your ‘friend since kindergarten.’ The kind and beautiful class superstar who wakes up her sleepy neighbor every day.”

“Huh? What?”

“Are you okay, Blade?” asked Sophie. “You really shouldn’t have jumped out of there by yourself. It might affect you in unexpected ways.”

“I will check.” His annoying underclassman—or rather, Iona—extended a set of diagnostic electrodes and stuck them to his forehead. “I detect some slight memory confusion, but not due to neural dysfunction. His perception has simply not yet caught up to reality,” she concluded before removing the electrodes.

“Um…what?” asked Blade. “You mean this was an illusion…or a simulation?”

Earnest nodded, her hair shaking. “That’s right! We wanted to give it to you as a present!”

“A present?”

“Yeah! A normal life! We all worked together to make it happen!”

Blade turned toward Iona, unsure what Earnest was talking about. He wanted a high-spec explanation from a high-spec machine— Yes, for a change, he actually wanted Iona to lecture him smugly what was going on.

“Normally, when using a virtual space, one’s consciousness remains unchanged, and only spatial awareness and physical sensations are overwritten. However, in this case, I interfered with my master’s memories directly.”

“So it was you,” muttered Blade. He’d figured Iona was the illusionist.

“Perhaps you found it jarring, having Earnest be your childhood friend, Cú your sister, and me your adorable underclassman. But any feelings like that should have disappeared within a few seconds.”

“I didn’t mind the first two much, but I was super uncomfortable with how adorable you were. Was I the only one you tricked like this?”

“Everyone except you was part of the cast. They all provided their enthusiastic cooperation.”

“Hee-hee! Being your childhood friend was hilarious!”

“I was your younger sister, honored Father! I didn’t have much of a role, though, so it was kinda boring. I was waiting for you to come home and shower me with attention! Too bad!”

“Being a transfer student was…difficult. Did I do well?” asked Sophie.

Blade turned away, too shy to answer.

“So, Master…how did you like your normal everyday life?” The automaton flashed him a beautiful smile. He had the urge to fire Dragon Eater at her but just barely resisted.

“Yeah, did you enjoy it, Blade?” asked Earnest. “How was it? You broke out real quick, so…was something not to your liking? What weren’t you into?”

“…Well, first off, what kind of world was that?”

“I referenced the oldest records I have access to in Mother’s database, then used them to simulate the life of a common, ordinary teenager during humanity’s most peaceful era. In other words, you were a student.”

“Oh? You mean that wasn’t a fantasy you created on your own, Iona?”

“It is somewhat like fantasy from the modern perspective.”

“Well? What do you think, Blade? “ asked Earnest. “Wanna do it again?”

“Next time, I will apply memory protection that not even you can break, Master.”

Blade laughed. “Please spare me…”

“Wait, you’re done? You don’t want to do it again?” Earnest looked a little downtrodden.

“No, I…”

How could he put it? That world was too dazzlingly bright for him. Too happy. If that was what normal or ordinary meant…

“I think I’ve had enough for now,” he said, smiling at everyone.

○Scene I: The Test Subject?

“Ah! There you are! Hey, Earnest!”

It was a typical afternoon in the typical dorm. School had ended for the day, and Blade had been looking for Earnest. When he found her, he raised his hand high and called out to her.

“What, Blade?” Earnest smiled for a moment, then put on a more serious face. “I can’t goof off right now. I’m going to the Proving Ground for some intense training. I mean…if you want to join me, I guess we could practice together, but…” She shot him a glance.

“Okay, see ya. I’ll go find someone else.” Blade turned around and started to walk away, not a care in the world.

Earnest grabbed the hem of his shirt. “Hey, wait, wait, wait! What? What is it? I can practice later, so spill! Are you gonna have fun with Ein and Zwei? Or maybe Cú? Wowie! Sounds fun!”

“No, nothing like that.”

“Really?”

“I’m looking for a test subject.”

“A…‘test subject’?” Earnest took a step back—almost a whole foot.

“Oh, it’s nothing dangerous, though! I don’t want you to help me try out the eighth dragon-destroying technique I just came up with or anything!”

“Dragon-destroying… Wait. Weren’t there only three of those?”

“No. There’s a four through seven, too.”

“And now eight, huh? Are these moves something I could even withstand?”

“No, there’s no way a human could handle it.”

They were targeted only at the oldest members of the draconic race. They’d all joined together once to take on Blade, in fact.

“All right, enough nonsense. What do you want from me?”

“Well, I’m always getting massages from you, right? So…”

“Huh? Massages? You want one? Should we go to the thermae?” Earnest looked delighted. Being sought after like this enlivened her.

“No, listen—”

“I’m listening.”

“I want to give you a massage.”

“What? You?”

“Right.”

“Do you know how?”

“What do you mean?”

“Won’t you destroy my body?”

“What do you think I am? A monster?”

“A super-being.”

“Okay, fine, I’ll ask someone else. Claire or Yessica or whoever.”

“Hey, wait, wait, wait! I’ll do it, I’ll do it! I’ll be your test subject!” Earnest clung to Blade, stopping him in his tracks and dragging him backward.

“Where should we go for this?” asked Blade. “My dorm room? Yours?”

“Huh? Why in a room?”

Alone in a closed room…? The thought made Earnest’s heart skip a beat.

“We need somewhere you can lie down, remember?”

“Oh, um, right,” replied Earnest, running a hand through her hair. “So…the bath?”

“Okay. Sounds good. Ready to go?”

He grabbed her hand. He grabbed her hand. He grabbed her hand! And then he set off briskly, tugging Earnest along behind him.

○Scene II: Blade-Style Massage Arts

“A-all ready…”

Earnest tied her wet hair on top of her head and stood in front of Blade. She was covering her privates with a small towel for some reason. They were at the usual large rock in the open-air thermae. The rock, half-submerged in the water, was always warm, its smooth surface perfect for lying down on. This was where Earnest always gave Blade her massages.

“Okay, lie down,” he said.

“S-sure…” She settled down on the rock.

“How does it feel to be having your first time, Anna?” Yessica heckled her from down in the bath.

“It’s not my first time!”

“Oh, it’s not?”

Yessica looked surprised, but Earnest was telling the truth. She had received a massage once before, though she’d been so nervous at the time that she couldn’t remember much about it.

She lay down flat against the rock, her heart pounding in her ears.

“Okay, put your arms up here and twist your hips a little this way.”

“Huh? This doesn’t seem like a normal massage.”

“Like I said, I’m doing an experiment.” Blade was telling the truth.

“You sure like some out-there positions, huh?”

“Yessica, please stop…” Earnest adjusted her pose as instructed.

“Okay, here we go…”

Blade began to wrap his arms around her in an equally strange position. Then…he pushed against Earnest’s body. Hard. With all his strength.

“Guuuh!”

Earnest sounded like a chicken being strangled. There was an audible crunching sound as her bones cracked. Strange noises came from her neck, spine, and lower back.

“Okay,” said Blade. “It’s going great.”

No! No, it’s not! Thought Earnest. Those are really dangerous sounds!

“All right, I’ll tackle this side next…”

Blade directed his force elsewhere, deftly destroying Earnest’s body from a different angle.

“Kekh!”

Another strange cry from Earnest’s throat. She wasn’t trying to make these sounds—the air simply rushed from her mouth, forcing out all sorts of noises as it passed through her spasming vocal cords.

This isn’t a massage! It’s a wrestling hold!

Earnest wanted to protest, but she couldn’t even speak anymore. Her body was completely under Blade’s control, like she was fighting against the greatest grappler of all time. She couldn’t move a finger, much less form words.

Blade kept digging into Earnest’s body, subjecting her to an assortment of strange techniques in a variety of strange positions, causing disturbing noises to sound from all over her. Bones and joints were seemingly pushed out of place—parts of her body that had no business moving at all.

“Hey, whoa, guys. Don’t come up here. And don’t go there, either. That’s a dangerous angle. You can see everything from there.”

Yessica shooed off the boys who kept gathering in a certain spot around the rock.

I don’t care about them! thought Earnest frantically. Stop Blade! He’s going to kill me…

“Okay! All done!”

The torture came to an abrupt end. And the moment Earnest was free…

“What the hell?! You think you can just play with someone’s body like that?! I thought I was going to die! That you were gonna kill me!”

“I wasn’t playing,” replied Blade, without a hint of remorse. “I was being completely serious. What do you think? Doesn’t your body feel lighter now?”

“‘Lighter’?! No, it doesn’t! You’ve destroyed it from head to… Wait. Huh?” Earnest pumped her arms and twisted her waist. Then she lifted a leg and delivered a quick three-kick combo. “Whoa! I do feel light…?! What the…? How?!”

Her body barely felt like her own any longer.

“Yeah, I rebuilt it. Practice and training are all good, but you’ve been really punishing your body. It was all out of alignment, so I fixed it up. If you feel lighter, that just means you’re back to your original state. There’s nothing all that special—”

“Wow! Blade, you’re amazing!”

“Huh? Amazing? …Me?”

Earnest thought Blade looked a little childish as he cheerfully rubbed the bottom of his nose.

○Scene III: A Brisk Business

“Aghh!”

“Nhhh!”

“Hngh!”

Screams that barely sounded human echoed throughout the thermae. Earnest was soaking in the bath beside Yessica.

“You know,” she said, scooping up some water and pouring it over her shoulders, “those screams seem so…intense, right? Like someone’s strangling a chicken.”

“Oh? You think so? I thought they sounded more like those kinds of screams.”

“Those? What kind do you mean?”

“Oh-ho. You don’t know, huh? More evidence you’re squarely in the never-done-it camp…”

“What are you talking about?”

It didn’t take long for Blade’s massage skills to become famous. To be honest, though, you couldn’t really call what he was doing a “massage.” It was closer to chiropractic work. Regardless, having their bodies “rearranged” by Blade had the same effect on his clients as an intense round of training, except it all happened instantly.

“Hwaaah…! I’m dying, I’m dying, I’m… Stop! Kill meee!”

Another victim—or rather, test subject—now lay on the rock. Earnest understood exactly how they felt. When it was her turn, she’d practically seen the grim reaper coming for her.

“See? I knew it,” she said. “You only scream like that when you’re about to be killed.”

“Sure, but…I mean, it’s kinda close to another kind of scream, you know?”

“Again, what kind are you talking about?”

“It’s hard to explain to someone who has no…experience.”

“…You’re not making any sense.”

Yessica’s face was all red for some reason.

All that screaming was simply the price Blade’s clients had to pay for the extraordinary boost in physical ability they received. To be specific, it was caused by the intense pain of having their joints dislocated, then put back in place again.

But how had Blade become a skilled chiropractor so suddenly? Apparently, it was the result of his intimate familiarity with the structure of the human body. He was well-versed in anatomy, which gave him intuitive knowledge of how to most efficiently destroy it—er, that is, how to make it function with peak efficiency. Even if Blade’s test subjects felt like they were dying, knowing the process would boost their power rank made everyone desperate for treatment.

As a result, the open-air bath now rang with hellish screams every evening after school.

“Ghrehhh!”

“Girls really shouldn’t make sounds like that.”

“Oh, I dunno…”

Earnest still had no idea what Yessica was on about. She scooped up some water and poured it over her shoulders, letting it flow down her chest. She wasn’t the biggest fan of how hands-on Blade was being with so many girls, but he wasn’t touching them that way, at least. Besides, his clientele was pretty evenly divided gender-wise.

“Why worry?” she muttered to herself. “It’s Blade, after all.”

Yes, this was Blade, the boy with the mind of a five-year-old child. Fretting about it was pointless.

“Hm? Why worry about what?” asked Yessica.

“Hee-hee-hee! Not telling,” said Earnest as she poured more water on herself.

○Scene IV: Blade’s Regret

“Sooo I think I’ve been doing it wrong.”

One day, at the height of his new business, Blade suddenly made a shocking confession.

“What do you mean, ‘wrong’?” asked Earnest. She was holding a fork in one hand, a sausage skewered on the end.

“Like, what I’ve been doing… It’s not actually a ‘massage,’ apparently.”

“Huh? Where is this coming from?”

“In a massage, you’re supposed to manipulate a person’s muscles, not their skeletal structure.”

“Right… But that’s kind of obvious, isn’t it?” Earnest bit into her sausage as she spoke.

“I-it is…? It was that obvious, huh…?” The realization seemed to deeply depress Blade.

“Oh, but, but they’re still kind of similar! It’s fine if you got it a little wrong! Don’t be so down on yourself! It’s okay! It’s totally normal! Anyone could’ve made that mistake!”

Earnest tried to cheer up Blade, though her arguments sounded a little too enthusiastic.

“You’re so kind, Anna,” said Yessica, elbowing Earnest in the side.

“It’s okay, Blade! Your massage was really good!” said Claire, Earnest’s other best friend.

“I’m telling you, it’s not a massage…” But their words had the opposite effect. Now Blade was even more depressed.

“Ah… I’m sorry. But your…adjustments worked really well, you know. I can move my body better than ever!”

“Yeah… In your case, Claire, your pelvis was out of alignment, so I fixed it up for you.”

“My pelvis…? Oh. So that was why you were touching my butt the whole time…”

Huh?

“Do you really need to go around touching girls’ butts, Blade?” demanded Earnest.

“Huh? What’re you talking about? I can’t fix someone’s pelvis otherwise. Her butt’s really big, so…”

“Big…?” muttered Claire. “Is it really that big? I—I always thought it was average sized…”

“Hey, Yessica, say something,” said Earnest.

“Say something, Yessica,” Blade chimed in.

“Yessica, is…is it really that big?” Claire asked desperately. “It’s not, right? Tell me it’s not!”

“This is chaos,” murmured Yessica.

“What do you mean, ‘chaos’? What’s chaotic about this?” asked Blade.

“What does ‘chaos’ mean?” Earnest demanded. “Are you even listening to me?”

“Huh? What?” said Claire, startled. “Um… It’s…that much? Awww…”

“Chaos,” Yessica said again.

“So wait, Blade,” said Earnest, turning back to him. “When did you touch it? How did you touch it? You didn’t do it in a dirty way, did you?”

“‘Dirty’…? Uh… I dunno, but it was kind of like this…” Blade began to demonstrate.

“Ahh! Hey! N-no! Blade!” shouted Claire. “Everybody’s here!”

“Hey, Claire,” said Yessica. “You realize you’re basically asking the rest of us to leave, right?”

“Why do you want to demonstrate? On me, no less?”

“You just said you wanted me to touch you,” said Blade.

“No one said that!” shouted Earnest. “Die, you stupid, insensitive super-being! You’re a perverted freak!”

“What does any of this have to do with being perverted?”

“Chaos,” Yessica said between laughs.

○Scene V: Blade-Style Massage Arts, Second Form

“So I’ve developed a new massage technique,” said Blade.

“New…? What kind of technique?”

Earnest was standing in front of the rock—their usual hangout spot in the bath. She was acting a bit shy now, covering her bare chest with her hands—an unconscious gesture she’d mostly stopped doing after getting used to mixed bathing.

“Lie down here for a sec.” Blade slapped the large rock a few times.

“Wh-what…?” Earnest took a step back.

“It’s okay. It’s fine.” He slapped the rock a few more times.

“Come on, Anna. Your love’s being tested right now,” Yessica said, acting dumb as always.

“It, it, it, it’s not about love! Not at all…! All right! I’m not some wimp, okay?! As the leader of this academy, I have a duty to set an example for everyone else! I have to take the initiative at all times!”

“So are you gonna do it or not? Just to be clear.”

Her best friend was relentless. Earnest couldn’t hold back any longer. She was on the verge of tears.

“Oh, Earnest? What’s wrong?” A woman whose body exuded glamor and elegance waltzed in through clouds of steam.

“Hey, Lunaria!” Blade called out. “Do you want to participate? I called my old technique First Form, but now I’m on Second Form! This time, I’ve developed a real massage.”

“By all means.”

Lunaria—Earnest’s mortal enemy—didn’t hesitate a single moment. Before, when Lunaria fell victim to Blade-Style Massage Arts, First Form, she’d come the closest to death out of anyone, emitting intense primal screams. Yet now, she didn’t hesitate one bit.

“Your treatment the other day was amazing,” she said. “I truly feel I have risen to a new level.”

“Really? I think I got it all wrong, though.”

“Blade…will you go all the way with killing me this time?”

Earnest’s rival wrapped her arm around Blade’s. They were both in the bath and, therefore, had no clothes on. Her chest, a size most other girls her age couldn’t compete with, was pressed against his upper arm, distorting its shape a little. But Blade remained calm.

“I won’t kill you or anything. I’m just fixing you. I promise not to break anyone ever again.”

“Oh… So that treatment before was just for me…? I’m honored.”

Earnest was getting increasingly irritated.

Again. All that squeezing against him. Stop it.

“Whoa. No more of that,” she said. “I’m gonna do it. I’ll go first. You’re after me. Now step away.”

She slipped between the two of them, pushing them apart. Then she took Blade’s hand and led him to the rock.

“I just lie down like this, right? Ready when you are…”

She lay face down, exposing her back. Once she’d resolved herself, the impending disaster no longer frightened her. She was accustomed to pain, after all. They called her the Flame Empress for good reason—every time she transformed into the Scion of Flame, she endured enough excruciating agony to instantly drive an ordinary person mad.

What’s the big deal? If it’s only as painful as having your bones rearranged, that’s nothing—

“Hwahh…”

A sound escaped Earnest’s mouth the moment Blade’s hand touched her back, and she put a hand to her lips to stifle it.

“What is it?”

“Oh, um… You’re not going to crack my bones again, are you?”

“No.”

“Huh? I…I know I said it hurt a lot the other day… Are you trying to go easy on me?”

“Like I said, I realized I was doing it wrong last time. So this time, I’m gonna give you a proper massage.”

“W-wait a minute. What do you mean by ‘proper’?”

Blade’s hand caressed Earnest’s back.

“Hyah!”

It was just a slight touch, but it produced a strange yelp from Earnest. She covered her mouth again.

“So, yeah, now I know… A massage is when you rub and knead the body to loosen up muscles and improve circulation, right?”

“Y-yes, that’s right… You’re right, but…”

Blade’s hands moved up and down Earnest’s back. She had to exercise considerable self-control to keep any other weird sounds from escaping her as Blade rubbed at her skin, stroked her muscles, then went down to her buttocks—

“You sure are noisy today. What’s the problem?”

He called me noisy! I’m trying so hard to hold it in, too! Not like he even cares! He was all gung-ho about feeling up Lunaria’s ass a second ago! And now he’s calling me noisy?!

“…You’re the one trying to stroke my butt,” she countered.

“Your butt? Oh, is it tense?” Blade reached for it with one hand.

“Hyaaah!”

“C’mon, shut up. I’m trying to give a proper massage here. Be quiet.”

“Hey…?! Wh-why? Why are you devoting so much attention…to just my butt…?!”

“Your rear end contains a lot of different muscles. You have to apply pressure from different directions to reach the deeper layers.”

“No, wait, um, wait! H-hey, hey! You’re getting too close, too close, stop… Whoa, that area’s definitely off limits! Stop, stop, stop!”

“Hm. Had enough already, Earnest?” said Lunaria. “Should I take that to mean it’s my turn? Would you mind giving me a butt massage, too, Blade?”

That was all it took to flip the switch in Earnest’s mind.

“Keep going, Blade,” she demanded.

“You told me to stop just now.”

“Ignore that. Do it.” She pointed her butt straight at Blade.

“Er, I’m done with your butt, so…”

He’s not gonna do it? I mean, I definitely wasn’t hoping he would, but…!

“Rear end, check. Next is your front.”

“What? Wait… The front? But that’s…”

“Great!” said Lunaria. “My turn, then—”

“Okay, one moment.”

Earnest rolled onto her back. It was one thing to show Blade her rear end but revealing her front was a different story. Her chest and lower extremities were now fully exposed. But she had already grown accustomed to the culture of mixed bathing, and she couldn’t let herself look weak around her archenemy, Lunaria. Besides, if she gave up the rock right now, Lunaria would be next in line for a massage…and Earnest couldn’t stand for that. She couldn’t let Blade give Lunaria such an erotic massage. She had to stop it at all costs.

“Whoaaa…”

Just below them, Earnest could see that a crowd of boys had formed, and they were making a commotion.

“Boys, go away,” she said. “Hey, Yessica, chase them off. In fact, kill them.”

“Got it!”

Yessica set off to brutally murder the boys as Earnest sprawled out on the rock, waiting for Blade. But his hands weren’t reaching out to her.

“…You’re not gonna do it?” she asked.

She was now actively inviting him to. But as for Blade…

Hffff… Hoooh… Hffff… Hoooh…

He was engaged in some kind of strange breathing technique. Two different types of spirit began emanating from his hands.

“Huh? Whoa, what…? What’s that? What are you charging up?”

“Something special. It was just a normal massage before, but this part’s gonna be incredible. Ready?”

“What do you mean, ‘special’…? Hyahn!”

Earnest yelped as Blade grabbed her breast with one hand and moved to her lower abdomen with the other.

“I’m going to rotate your second and fourth chakras, okay? Below the navel and around the heart. Women have extra stuff around their hearts, so I’ll have to go a little harder to penetrate the layer of fat.”

“Wait…! What do you mean, ‘extra stuff’? That’s important stuff! …Wait, what? ‘Harder’? Huh? Wait! Stop!”

“Here we go.” Blade used his palms to inject spirit into her.

“Ah! Gah! Hrgh!”

Earnest recoiled from the unknown sensation running through her body. She let out a muffled groan and stretched all the way to the tips of her toes.

The flow of energy within her was being forcibly manipulated. The last massage she’d received from the super-being—the “wrong” one—had rearranged her skeletal structure. But in this massage, which was probably just as wrong, he was rearranging the flow of her spirit. Last time, the treatment had come at the cost of unspeakable pain. But this time, whatever he was doing was…

“B-Blade… N-no, s-s-stop…”

“It’s okay, it’s okay.”

“N-no, it’s not okay…! Wh-why is this happening?! It feels… It feels so good!”

“Yeah, it sure does,” Blade said nonchalantly.

Earnest panted, gasping for air, and shook her head as tears welled up in the corners of her eyes.

No. That’s not it. That’s not what I mean! It’s not that kind of “good” at all!

“Not that! That’s not what I— Aaagh! N-no! No, you can’t!”

“No, no, no, it’s fine. It might feel kinda unusual, but trust me, all right? I know a thing or two about this. Not just human anatomy, but a person’s inner workings, too. I stole— I mean, I learned it all from my master, so…”

The super-being never stopped smiling at her. When he said “a thing or two,” he meant by super-being standards, no doubt.

Earnest was no longer capable of thinking straight. She was convulsing, arching her back and settling back down at a steady rhythm.

Nn, nhhh…

“Right, right. You know, I feel really good when you give me a massage, too. So for today, let’s switch places, and I’ll help you feel good, too. Directly massaging your spirit like this lets me do more than loosen your muscles and improve your blood flow. I can help correct your spirit flow, too. Make it work the way it’s supposed to.”

“Ooh. Hnngh. Urrrgh.”

He was “correcting” her spirit the way only a super-being could. And the most frightening thing was that the price wasn’t pain. It was pleasure.

What’s going to happen to me…?

“Okay, that’s it. Good job. You can take a break now.”

Blade moved away from Earnest, who was lying on the rock like a corpse, and observed the crowd around him. They were all dazed, their faces blank.

“Um, so who’s next?”

“I…I’m fine. Just fine. Nothing’s wrong with me at all. I’ll just go smell the flowers and play with my doll…”

“Is that a no, Lunaria? Okay, how about you, Yessica?”

“Huh? Oh, well, I’m a little interested, but…I dunno if I want to take it that far…”

“No, no, no, it’s fine! It’s perfectly all right.”

“Huh? Ah! Hey—”

And so, Yessica became the next victim. She made a commotion for a while, all “ah, ah, ahgggh” and so on, but soon grew quiet and limp. It was time for Blade to move on…

“You next, Clay?”

“Huh?”

“It’d be a lot more fun than just watching.”

“N-no! Wait! Open your eyes! I’m a guy!”

“…So what?”

“So what?!”

Clay was victim number three. And once he was limp on the ground…

“No! I’m fine!”

…Blade turned to another male student, who tried with all his might to refuse.

“But you were watching, weren’t you? Aren’t you interested? It’s fine. Don’t worry about it. We’re all friends here. I’ll do all of you, okay?”

“S-stay back! B-battle formation! Anti-super-being formation! N-3!”

Everyone took up position to fight the super-being. But, of course, resistance was futile.

“I’m gonna take you all in order, okay?”

And so everyone (except Iona) wound up receiving a Blade-style massage.

○Scene I: Iona’s Request

“Master. Master, Master. I want to give you my hypothesis.”

“I’m good.”

Blade and his classmates were engaged in the usual afternoon training at the usual Proving Ground when Iona, who had been sitting on the fence watching the proceedings, suddenly jumped down and approached Blade.

“I believe the recent intense discrimination against me is due to the fact that I am not an organic living being.”

Earnest, Blade’s current sparring partner, waited until she had landed a powerful, spirit-laden strike before speaking up.

“She’s right, Blade. You treat Iona horribly. Are you even aware? I’m guessing no.”

“That’s not true. I treat Iona completely normally. I’ve always treated her this way. In fact, I’ve even stopped cutting her up into pieces. That’s proof of how much I respect her these days.”

Blade fought back with equal force, but Earnest’s sword wound up slicing halfway through his. It took incredible skill to block Earnest’s Asmodeus with a plain old magic sword, and even worse, Earnest had recently realized that even if Asmodeus was partially broken, it still worked just the same, so she was hitting as hard as always.

“As my first piece of evidence,” began Iona, “I submit the fact that during the recent tongue-kissing incident, I was the only one who did not receive your Blade-style greeting.”

“I don’t need your first piece of evidence. Or the second or third. I don’t want your testimony. I’m not even listening.”

“Hey, he didn’t do it to me, either,” Earnest said.

Iona was the type who never listened to anyone—and right now, of course, she was looking straight at Blade and no one else. There was no way Earnest was getting a reply.

The “tongue-kissing incident,” as Iona described it, had occurred strictly because Blade was misinformed. He’d mistaken a good morning kiss as a standard greeting, and now that he knew the truth, he had no intention of repeating his mistake (or rather, tragedy) again.

“My second piece of evidence is—”

“I’m not listening. Go away.”

“That’s so mean of you, Blade,” said Earnest. “At least hear her out.”

“During your more recent massage rampage, I was the only one who did not receive one of your orgasm massages.”

“O-org…”

Huh? Is Earnest blushing? Why? And what’s an orgasm?

“I assume this is because my biological components are only designed for camouflage purposes and lack the spirit necessary for me to exist as a living organism.”

“Well, yeah,” Blade said. “What good would it do to give you a massage?”

Iona had the body of a well-proportioned young woman. The way she put it, her dimensions represented a man’s idea of a perfectly attractive woman. It was thus easy to forget that her whole look was simply a disguise.

The truth was, she wasn’t even human. Her body was made of skin, fat, and musculature, but those muscles were just for show; it was her metal skeleton that actually moved her body. That was why she just sat with Cú and watched everyone train instead of joining in. Without any muscles, there was no way to further “build” her body. Massages were similarly meaningless for her—she had no muscles to loosen up, and with no spirit flowing in her body, Blade-Style Massage Arts, Second Form wasn’t able to alter it to improve her physical condition.

Furthermore, the reason Blade refused to show Iona any kindness was because, as a Guardian, her mental structure was fundamentally different from a human’s. Unlike humans, they saw interacting with superior beings as the foundation of their happiness. Their primary role—their whole reason for existing—was to prevent hostile entities from invading critical locations or to learn the meaning of strength by being destroyed.

And so, Blade constantly blew Iona away, unilaterally trampling her, to ensure that she considered him her superior. The best way to make Iona happy was for Blade to constantly make her think there’s no way I could ever beat him! Dragons were similar, but trampling a dragon right after they hatched would make them imprint on you for life—in Iona’s case, the trampling had to go on forever.

It was so annoying. If Blade were to describe Iona the Guardian in a simple, concise, and easy-to-understand way, he’d call her a welcome mat, designed to be stepped on all day, every day.

And so, Blade was using her in the most appropriate way possible…wasn’t he?

“Look, what are you even complaining about?” he asked.

“The ‘young-maiden circuit’ that has sprouted within my positron brain is demanding special treatment from my master,” said Iona.

“Sounds like a bug. Fix it.”

“Hee-hee-hee-hee-hee… I will not. Every young maiden has her secrets.”

“Hey, Earnest, can you say something to her? This piece of junk is calling herself a ‘maiden’ now… Hello?”

“Th-that isn’t true at all. I did not have an o-o-org… Oh, I can’t say it around other people… Not a young woman like me… It’s just impossible. How could I be so brazen…?”

Earnest seemed to be having problems of her own.

“So, in conclusion,” said Iona. “I have a request for you, Master.”

“No. I’m not gonna kiss you. I’m not gonna rearrange your bones, and I’m definitely not gonna give you an ‘orgasm massage,’ whatever that is.”

“I already anticipated such an answer.”

“Oh, really? So what do you want?”

“I want you to teach me a dragon-destroying technique. In particular, I wish to learn how to use Dragon Smasher.”

“Huh?” Blade’s eyes widened.

That was unexpected. He had never heard of a machine handling spirit, much less for a skill like that. Yes, for Heroes, it was on the lower end of fighting-force moves, one of the most basic techniques that almost anyone could learn…but a dragon-destroying skill? She wanted to learn that?

“No.”

That was his conclusion. Rather than a refusal, he simply thought it would be impossible for her. But his response was the same either way.

“I already anticipated such an answer,” she said again, smiling until her cheeks dimpled. “Therefore, I figured I’d ask Clay to teach me. Would that be all right with you?”

“Huh? Clay?” Blade looked toward the other boy, who was training nearby.

“Huh? Me?” Clay stopped sparring with Yessica and the others and looked over, pointing at his own surprised face.

“It is now common knowledge that Clay has mastered Dragon Smasher.”

That was true. Clay was throwing the move around all the time now. Everyone was like that whenever they got a new toy—they wanted to show it off at every possible occasion. He still hadn’t practiced enough, however, so he couldn’t access the skill’s full potential. He was just shooting it willy-nilly, claiming he’d learned directly from the Hero.

“Can you teach me, Clay?”

Iona went up to him, taking his arm and pressing her bouncy, elastic breasts against him. They were very good imitations, virtually indistinguishable from a human woman’s. Artificial breasts that advanced were basically the real deal. It wasn’t like there were “worthy” and “unworthy” breasts, after all. At least, that was probably the logic moving Clay at the moment, since around 98 percent of his brain had been infected by thoughts of boobs.

“I’d rather learn it from you than from Blade.”

“Oh, y-yeah… Of course… Sure…”

Clay couldn’t have looked smugger if he’d tried. All the girls stared at him blankly. And Blade, for reasons he couldn’t articulate, was unbelievably peeved.

○Scene II: Clay and Iona

“Ah. Oh. Um. Tea? Have some tea, maybe? Uh… I have snacks, too.”

Clay welcomed Iona into his room. Blade often came over and asked for something to eat, so Clay made sure to always keep snacks on hand. It was rare for him to have a girl in his room, though. This was the very first time, so he was a bit nervous.

“The intake of water and organic matter is not required for the maintenance of my body. No need to worry.”

Iona kneeled directly on the bare wooden floor. Clay, being a considerate sort of guy, wanted to offer her a cushion, but Iona didn’t even seem to need it. She rested on the hard floor without the slightest look of discomfort.

“…Oh,” Clay replied.

Come to think of it, where did Kassim go? He looked at me with a big smirk when Iona arrived and said he would step out and wouldn’t be back for two hours. Why two hours?

“…So. Um…you wanted me to teach you Dragon Smasher, right…? Maybe we’d be better off doing that at the Proving Ground?”

Dragon Smasher, the first of the dragon-destroying skills, wasn’t as powerful as Dragon Eater, the second. Invoking it indoors, however, was certain to destroy Clay’s dorm room. It might even open a hole in the wall. Dragon Eater, on the other hand, might blow the whole dorm building away. You’d be lucky if any part of the structure was left standing.

“No. This place is perfect. It will allow us to hide from prying eyes. And, Clay…what I am about to ask you for is a very private favor.”

“Huh? Private? …Why?”

“I want you to pour what you have into me.”

“What? Huh? Whaaat?!”

Clay was shocked but proved helpless to resist as Iona grabbed him and pushed him down on the floor.

“Honored Father? What are you doing?” asked Cú.

“Shhh. Quiet.”

Blade was in the dormitory’s hallway, ear pressed against Clay’s door as he listened intently to the sounds coming from inside. He couldn’t understand any of it, though. Even with his Hero Ears, he wasn’t able to listen in.

Once, in the past, Blade had fought someone whose hearing was so good they could create a picture of their surroundings using soundwaves alone, even sharper than a visual image. But that was like a physical trait that person was born with, like a bat’s echolocation. A normal person, even an ex-Hero, couldn’t just learn a skill like that.

“What are Clay and Iona doing, honored Father?”

“I don’t know… Apparently, Clay is ‘pouring’ something into Iona.”

“What’s he pouring? And where?”

“Good question. Oh… I hear something again. ‘That was amazing, Clay. Give me a lot more of that.’”

“What’s amazing? More of what?”

“I have no idea.”

Blade and Cú both raised an eyebrow. What could Iona and Clay possibly be doing in there? It was a mystery.

○Scene III: Dragon Smasher Revealed

“Draaagon…Smaaaasher!”

With a loud whoosh, the ground shook as the target—a suit of magic armor tied to a stake—was shattered into pieces.

“Dragon Smasher! Dragon Smasher! Dragon Smasher!”

Then with a series of finger snaps, she struck again. The spiraling energy flew from her, no preliminary movement giving away her next move as she blew up all the armor sets arranged in a circle around her, one after the other.

“Wow, she’s building up her spirit and everything.” Blade politely clapped his hands. “Unlike Clay, who rushes it and winds up misfiring, you’re really bringing out the technique’s true power.”

“My master praised me.” Iona stuck her tongue out in a contrived “silly me” look.

“M-misfiring…? That’s not what’s happening. I’m purposely adding in an explosion…”

Clay was talking again. But you were only supposed to add on to a technique after mastering the basics, so Blade couldn’t take him seriously.

“But how did you do it? You’re a Guardian. You shouldn’t be able to tap into spirit or fighting force like that.”

“I define my own limits,” Iona said. “And with all due respect, I believe I have just disproved the notion that I cannot generate fighting force. Please update your knowledge base.”

“All right. Sorry. I was wrong.” Blade had to be honest.

At that, Iona’s face began to gleam. The effect was almost blinding. It went beyond mere joy or delight—it was sheer rapture. And that meant it looked pretty silly to everyone else.

“Hey, I think she’s broken. Can someone fix her?”

Blade turned toward to the others. They all looked just as surprised, saying things like “Blade praised her…,” “she was praised by a super-being…,” and “the super-being actually admitted he was wrong…”

How rude. Even Blade made mistakes. If he messed up, he admitted he was wrong and fixed his mistake. What kind of person did they think he was?”

“Hey, how ’bout you show me some more?” Blade motioned at the student in charge of equipment. “…Yo! Can we get, like, a dozen more targets put in place?”

“I’m sorry,” Iona said, “but I am out of ammunition.”

“Th-that’s fine! Here, I can teach you how to use Dragon Eater next!”

“That is a very alluring offer, but I must decline. I have a promise to keep. Now, Clay, let us go.” She grabbed Clay’s arm and walked away.

“Hey! I said I’d teach you!” shouted Blade.

But Iona didn’t look back. She just wiggled her hips as she disappeared from the Proving Ground.

Pffft. Snicker, snicker, snicker…

Hearing laughter behind him, Blade turned around, a fierce look in his eyes. He couldn’t determine who was snickering at him. So instead, he yelled at the entire crowd.

“Right! Who wants to learn Dragon Eater? I’ll teach anyone who wants to learn!”

Everyone’s faces turned pale with horror. After a few moments of pushing and shoving, Earnest was finally tossed to the front of the audience.

“Sure! I’ll learn it! I’m not s-scared at all! I’m perfectly all right! So c’mon! Let’s do it!”

“Great! You better be ready, ’cause I’m not gonna hold back!”

Blade suddenly became the most motivated teacher in the world. He might be confused and irritated, but he was venting all that emotion straight into Earnest’s mind!

○Scene IV: The Invasion

“Honored Father, I’m booored.”

“Shhh. Quiet.”

“Blade, um, this is really too hard to watch…”

“Shhh. Quiet.”

Blade shushed Cú then Earnest in rapid succession. What was hard to watch? Blade didn’t know, but he wished Earnest would stop saying stupid things to him.

“If you are happy with this, Blade, then so am I.”

“Get back, Sophie. You can’t handle this. Or do you think he looks happy right now? Which part of this pathetic creature clinging to a door, listening intently, looks ‘happy’ to you?”

Blade was getting pretty severely dissed, but he was too busy to respond. He was hanging on every word, every syllable of the conversation taking place beyond the door, stretching his Hero Ears to their limits.

“‘Ahh, yes. Good. Clay. More. Pour more into this part of me, please. More, more.’ Hey, what’s that mean, guys?”

“I think it means exactly what it sounds like. Can someone get Maria over here? Personally, I think this behavior merits some discipline for both of them.” Earnest sounded furious.

“‘No, Iona, I…I can’t make any more for you. I just can’t.’ Hey, what’s that mean, guys?”

“That’s disgusting, Clay!” Claire was just as angry.

“Well, why don’t we give them a little more time before storming in? There’s a kind of clarity that comes over you after the act that’s, like, really important, you know? If we take that away from them, they might not feel fulfilled.” Yessica, meanwhile, was going on about something else entirely.

“Okay, okay, okay, move aside, everyone. Please move aside.”

Maria had arrived, complete with her armband reading DISCIPLINARY COMMITTEE.

“This is the Disciplinary Committee! Hands up! …Um, I mean, is this where the lewd behavior in the dormitory is taking place?”

Maria was incredibly motivated. She was determined to crack down on whatever was going on.

“Wait a moment, dear. I’m rather interested in what’s going on here,” said the Overlord.

“Ah… Stop! Deemo, don’t!”

Maria and the Overlord were talking to each other through the same mouth. Maria’s hands began to betray her as they untied her braids. With a flutter of black hair, the Overlord’s mark appeared on her forehead, and a magic beast took Maria’s place.

“Heh-heh-heh… What we’ll do is, we’ll barge in right at the best part.” The Overlord pressed her ear against the door, right next to Blade.

“‘Ah, more, more, plenty of it… So great and hot… Please put more of that in here for me…’ Hey, what’s that mean, guys?”

“Heh-heh-heh… Don’t be so impatient, Blade. Give them some more time.”

“‘Ahh, it’s coming…it’s coming… Very good, Clay, excellent.’ Hey, what’s that mean, guys?”

Blade had been giving live commentary to the crowd, but no one was answering his questions. The girls were blushing, half of them covering their faces with their hands and peeking through their fingers, while the boys were practically snorting with excitement.

“Hey, what’s that mean, guys?”

“Okay, Blade, now! Let’s go find out!”

The Overlord all but grabbed him by the neck and flung the door open as they marched in.

Two figures were entangled in the darkened room. Clay was on the floor, lying on his back, and Iona was straddling him. The spheres on her arms glowed faintly in the darkness. She took Clay’s hand and pressed it against them.

“Whoa! Hey, Iona, what’s going on?” said Blade, doing his best to assess the situation. “You shouldn’t force him, you know!”

“Oh? Are you mating?” asked the Overlord. “Is this even correct form?” It sounded like she’d been expecting something even stranger.

“H-help me…”

Clay, meanwhile, was calling for assistance. In fact, he looked a bit like a dried-up mummy. When living beings tapped into too much of their spirit, they ran the chance of winding up like this. It was a fairly common sight in the Hero business.

“Can’t you hear him, Iona?” asked Blade. “He’s begging for help.”

“Clay agreed to cooperate with me. This is a consensual extraction.”

“Help me… I’m…dying…”

“You see, Iona? He said he’s dying.”

“Clay. Please hold out for a little longer. You should have enough for several more rounds.”

“That’s enough!”

Blade brought his fist down on Iona’s skull. The force was enough to crack her metal skeleton, proof he was serious.

“That hurt, Master.”

“Explain why you turned Clay into a withered corpse. You’d better give me a convincing reason, or else I’ll tear you apart and throw your wreckage at Mother’s feet, all right?”

“I am honored that you care so much about my fate. I followed the guidance of my young-maiden circuit and attempted a different behavior pattern than usual. It proved to be the right decision.”

“This is your last warning. Answer me.”

“Wow, Blade’s super jealous!” yelled Earnest.

“Am not!”

“Wow! Iona! How did you even do that? Tell me, tell me, tell me! I’ve got to know!”

“Listen to me!”

Earnest was being far too noisy. Did she really need to jump around like that? Blade was the one questioning Iona right now.

“I underwent certain modifications which enabled me to manipulate spirit.”

“Spirit? Modifications? I don’t understand.”

“Heh-heh-heh! Then let me, Eliza Maxwell, explain the facts to you mortals,” said Eliza, appearing from behind the crowd. “As a machine, Iona cannot handle spirit or fighting force. She may contain some biological components, but she lacks the critical mass required to generate the chakra organs necessary to circulate and amplify spirit. Furthermore, the complexity of her own tissues has yet to reach the point where fractal structures can form independently.”

“Um…can you explain that in a way normal humans can understand.”

“Well, there’s this little invention I came up with a while back… You know the cartridges that store spirit and magical force, right? It’s standard equipment for you guys by now. Well, I built an upgraded version—a set of highly efficient, high-capacity energy absorption crystals—and implanted them into Iona.”

“Yes, and it is working excellently,” said Iona. “You are a genius, Eliza.”

“That goes without saying by now, don’t you think? But…hee-hee! All right. I’ll let you say it again.”

“You are a genius. A genius. A genius. I can control my spirit now thanks to you. I am very grateful. Dragon Smasher!”

With a thud, energy coursed out of Iona and blew a hole in the wall.

“Look, Master. I am a living being now. I am human.” The energy absorption crystals in her eyes and palms glowed green in the darkness.

Really? She thinks that’s human? Is she for real…?

“No you’re not. You’re a life-sucking monster. And actually…there were some of you in the Overlord’s army, too, sucking humans dry… What were they called? Oh, right. The Succubus Force.”

Once upon a time, back when he was a Hero, Blade fell into a trap and got surrounded by dozens of succubi at once. He managed to escape after “filling them up” to maximum, but if it were hundreds or thousands of them instead of just dozens, even a Hero like him would’ve been in danger.

“Succubi are magic beasts, and magic beasts are not that different from people,” argued Iona. “In fact, Ovie’s a Nightwalker, but she is treated as human by all of you.”

“I’m pretty sure she’s only half.” Blade wrapped his arm around the Overlord’s neck. She chuckled and rubbed her cheek against his.

“What are you talking about, Master? Right now, I am much more human than a super-being like you.”

“Oh… Yeah. Yeah, you’re right.” Earnest nodded. Everyone else seemed to agree.

That was sure harsh.

“Okay, okay, okay. So what we thought was going on in here was something else entirely and just a misunderstanding!” said Earnest. “It’s time to disperse, okay, everyone? And Iona, stop going overboard, all right? We can’t have you producing mummies like this. Learn to rein it in a little. And if there are any more volunteers among the boys, you can go talk to Iona later. But no cutting in line, all right? Good. Dismissed!” The Empress clapped her hands and sent everyone off.

“Master. Master, Master. Master. Now I can fire Dragon Smasher dozens more times. Look at me, look at me. Let’s go to the Proving Ground so I can show you. Fire, fire, fire. When else can I fire them but now, I ask you?” Iona threw the mummified Clay aside and ran up to Blade.

“I already saw that today.”

Blade began walking down the hallway, already fed up with Iona as she clung to his feet like a puppy. He definitely wasn’t heading to the Proving Ground…

Still, something didn’t sit right with him about all this. Especially the part where Earnest got all smug and claimed he was jealous. That had made no sense. How could he be jealous over Iona? It was stupid, stupid, stupid. He didn’t even know what “jealous” meant.

○Scene V: Dragon Smasher of Sorrow

“Dragon…Smasher.”

Clay, still not fully conscious and looking like a wrinkly old man, shouted the name of the technique with the kind of enthusiasm you’d expect from someone with one foot in the grave.

But then the magic armor he’d targeted exploded into a million pieces.

“Nice one, Clay!”

Blade had to hand it to him. That was perfect. He had mastered the move and delivered a Dragon Smasher at full power. Before, he’d always rushed it, limiting the move’s power to a fraction of its true potential. But now it was perfect. In fact, it was beyond perfect. It was complete. There weren’t a lot of people who could fire it off with such perfection, even in the Hero business.

“Dragon Smasher, Dragon Smasher, Dragon Smasher.”

And he could even use it rapid-fire without any preliminary setup.

“Dragon Smasher, Dragon Smasher, Dragon Smasher.”

His body might have been squeezed dry by Iona, left completely dehydrated with only a few drops of energy left, but he still boasted some very impressive rapid-fire skills. This was beyond the realm of mastery or expertise. Clay had achieved total clarity, the sort Yessica had spoke of outside his door. What that meant, Blade couldn’t say, but it was definitely amazing. True clarity was incredible.

“Dragon Smasher of Sorrow…”

And he’d even added a suffix to his version of the move. Perhaps Clay had come up with a whole new technique. With the amount of “clarity” he now had in his life, he seemed more than capable of it.

○Scene I: Earnest’s Resolve

“Hey there, Red Avenger!”

“Will you stop that?”

“Hey, hey, Red Avenger! ♪”

“I said, stop it!”

“Yo, Red Avenger!”

“I’m gonna cut you!”

Students were arriving in class and greeting the Empress as usual, and Earnest was frowning at them, as usual.

Blade, catching sight of her, raised his hand. “Hey, Earnest, good mor—”

Zwip!

“Ahh! Why are you slashing at me?!”

“Shut up! I said I’d cut you! I warned you!”

“I didn’t do it! I didn’t do it! I didn’t, at least!”

“Shut up, super-being! I can’t cut you down anyway! Why do you care? Can’t you let me slice you just a little bit?!”

“You’re losing your grip on reality!”

“Shut up! You’re such an idiot! Go ahead, everyone! Make fun of me behind my back! You’re right, I’m the Red Avenger!”

Earnest chased after Blade, swinging her sword the whole way. She’d made great strides recently, and her blade skills were so sharp that only an ex-Hero could have survived her attacks. The whole school was now in lethal danger.

Blade and Lunaria exchanged glances. They knew what to do here, and at just the right moment, they tripped Earnest up, making her fall flat on her face. She stayed on the ground, sobbing uncontrollably.

“Ngh…hic…ennhh… Weeeh…!”

“What is she crying for?” asked Blade.

“I don’t know,” said Lunaria. “She was carrying on about the ‘Red Avenger’ or something.”

“Does anyone know who that is?” Blade asked the class.

The other students greeted the question with uncomfortable expressions.

“Okay. Yessica?” Blade saw Yessica raise her finger slightly and pointed at her.

“Um, I think…she was probably embarrassed.”

“Embarrassed? About what?”

“About being called the Red Avenger, I mean. During training yesterday, Anna went into Scion of Flame mode again, right?”

“Yeah. She was sparring with Lunaria, and then she got really angry and caught on fire. Literally.”

“Right, and after she goes into Scion mode, she winds up naked, yeah?”

“Uh-huh.”

“And all she’s got on is that red cloak, right?”

“Come to think of it, who keeps giving her that thing just in the nick of time?”

“Red suits milady.”

“Oh, it was you, Leonard?” asked Blade. He’d had no idea.

Whenever Earnest transformed into the Scion of Flame, she burned everything up, including her physical body. The only thing that remained was Asmodeus, her sword. That meant someone had to keep giving her that red cloak. Apparently, it’d been Leonard the whole time.

“Right, so that’s why she’s called the Red Avenger,” Yessica concluded.

Come to think of it, Earnest used to be called the Nude Avenger. Somewhere along the line, that had become the Red Avenger.

“But they only call you the Red Avenger as a term of endearment, you know?”

“No! I don’t want that! I hate it! Don’t you get it?!” Earnest banged her fists on the floor. Cracks began to form.

She’s gonna destroy the building…

“But you are the Red Avenger, aren’t you?” insisted Yessica.

“No, I’m not!”

“But you are, right?”

“Yes, but…!”

“See? You are.”

“…I know!”

“Do you wanna go back to being the Nude Avenger instead?”

“Of course not! Red Avenger’s a lot better than that!”

“Then, what’s the problem?”

This was a little beyond Blade. What could Earnest possibly be so angry about? Of course, she was always angry about something—that was just part of her character. Still…

“I don’t get it… Do you guys understand?” Blade asked, turning to the other students. But just as he was about to say “see, Earnest, they don’t know, either,” he saw everyone turn away, clearly uncomfortable.

“I’m sorry, Anna… I thought you liked it.”

This apology from her best friend, Yessica, seemed to trigger something in Earnest.

“That’s it! Enough! I’ll figure this out by myself! And I’ll make sure nobody calls me that incredibly dishonorable nickname again! The Red Avenger will never be heard from again!”

She stood up and indignantly stomped away, her footsteps heavy enough to leave clear marks on the concrete floor. Blade folded his arms behind his head as he watched her go.

Earnest is weird. So weird. So, so, so weird.

○Scene II: Training Under Lunaria

“I absolutely, positively, never wanted to do this, Lunaria… But I just don’t see any other way, so I’m turning to you.”

Lunaria was having afternoon tea up on the terrace when Earnest came stomping over to her.

“Ah, Earnest, good afternoon. How can I help you?”

“How can you help me…? I came to be your pupil. You should be honored.”

“What are you hoping to learn?”

“I swear, why are you constantly so mean to me?! I came all the way over here to ask for your help! Even though I really, really didn’t want to! But here I am, bowing my head to you anyway!”

“You’re not,” Lunaria said.

“What?”

“You’re not bowing, are you?”

“Ugh…”

Earnest, now at a total loss for words, reluctantly bowed ever so slightly forward.

“Well, that’s not nearly enough, is it? If you kept going until your forehead was touching the ground, perhaps I would consider your request.”

“Ugh…” Unsure what to say, Earnest began to tear up. “Why are you like this to me? You’ve always been this way!”

“And why have you always been so arrogant? Really, is that how you ask someone for a favor? …Ah, but now I see. You’ve never been taught anything by anyone before, have you? No, you’ve been all high-and-mighty, ruling over everyone as the Empress and so on.”

“You’re the Empress of the northern academy, aren’t you?!”

“Hmm. Well, yes. I suppose I am. But I’m certainly not the kind of second-rate Empress they have around here.”

“That’s why I’m asking you to teach me! I’m bowing now, aren’t I?! Why don’t you just do it?!”

Lunaria pushed her tea aside. “Again, what exactly do you want me to teach you?”

“You’re so mean! Mean, mean, mean!”

“Earnest, you must understand that you haven’t specified what you want to learn from me yet.”

“…Huh?” Earnest blinked. “What? I told you.”

“You did not.”

“Huh? Huh? Huh?”

“I heard you say that you wanted to learn from me…but what exactly is the subject you wish to learn about?”

“What? Oh. Um. Well…”

“You don’t have to be afraid. I’m not some kind of monster, you know.”

“Well, um… It… It’s about transformation.”

“Transformation? Well, you do that all the time already, don’t you? Your grand transformation into the Red Avenger—”

“Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Don’t say it! I’m done with that! I’m leaving that name behind forever!”

“…I do hope you will get to the point soon. My tea is getting cold.”

“They don’t call you the Blue Avenger, do they?”

“Not at all. I would never be called such a dishonorable nickname. If anyone dared try, I think they would cease to exist immediately.”

“Right, because when you come out of Scion mode, you’re already wearing that blue outfit, aren’t you? That’s not fair! So teach me!”

“Oh, you mean that?”

“Yes! That! Where do you get that outfit from? You big cheat! Tell me!”

“My, my. A ‘cheat,’ you say? Hmm. I am nothing if not a cunning young lady, true. But goodness, such horrid accusations…”

“I’m sorry! Allow me to correct myself. You are a kind, beautiful girl who is both my dear friend and worthy rival. So…will you teach me?”

“Oh my… Flattery won’t get you anywhere with me, you know.”

“Yes it will! It’ll get me the secret behind that blue outfit of yours!”

“Well… All right. I could tell you… Perhaps during afternoon training, then?”

“Yes! Yes! Yes, yes! …Ahh, there really is nothing better than having a good friend! I love you, Lunaria! I love you so much!”

“A-again, all this talk…!” Lunaria blushed. “Sh-shut up already! Ugh! What are you on about?! I… I mean, I suppose that I, too…might feel just a tiny bit s-s-similarly about—”

“See? So c’mon, Luna! Let’s go! I’ll be waiting for you!”

Earnest was already gone.

…How cruel, thought Lunaria, as she lifted her head and strode off after Earnest.

○Scene III: The Ice Dress and the Flame Dress

“All right. First, let’s transform.”

Earnest and Lunaria were in the Proving Ground, the two Empresses of the academy on their feet and facing each other. Their class’s actual instructor was silently kneeling on the ground, unable even to announce the day’s training schedule.

“Huh? Ah! Wait a minute!”

Earnest put a hand on her clothing. She took off her sword belt and jacket, then hurriedly removed one boot and then the next, nearly falling over as she did.

“I—I mean…when I transformed yesterday, that was totally unexpected! So I burned my whole outfit, and now I’m out of backups…”

“Ah, yes, nobles with no money… Whatever shall we do with you?”

Lunaria rubbed the space between her eyebrows. The contempt in that gesture hit her partner like a ton of bricks.

Earnest threw her boots to one side and got ready to ignite herself…then thought better of it. She removed her bolero, unbuttoned her overblouse, then reached for her pleated skirt…

“Boys! Don’t look! I’ll kill you all!”

“Stripping in public now? Of all the ridiculous things for a barbarian noble to do…”

Lunaria wasn’t just telegraphing contempt now. She felt actual pity for Earnest.

Enduring the humiliation, Earnest neatly folded her clothes. She still had some extra panties and tights, so she had no problem burning those up as she became the Scion of Flame.

“All right. I’ve transformed.”

“Honestly. How unsightly…”

But Earnest no longer cared what Lunaria said. After burning everything away, she was no longer mortal.

“Come on. You transform, too.”

“Ice…Transform!”

With that cool little intro, Lunaria began her transformation.

That’s not fair. Why does she have a catchphrase? We’re both doing the same thing, but now she seems ten times cooler than me!

“All right. I am transformed.”

“No fair! No fair… Next time, I’m gonna say something like ‘Fire…Transform!’ too, all right?!”

“Um… All right. Go right ahead, if you wish…”

Lunaria looked genuinely confused. That was exactly why Earnest hated geniuses.

Now the Scion of Flame and the Scion of Ice stood facing each other, a set distance apart. There was only six or so feet between them, but one was starting to melt, and the other was beginning to have her fires extinguished. If they got any closer, they probably would’ve annihilated each other.

Come to think of it, I have the Magic Sword of Flame and she has the Magic Sword of Ice…but there are similar wind- and earth-oriented blades elsewhere in the kingdom. I wonder if their wielders can become scions, too? It’s been a long time since I saw either of them…

“All right. Ready to go back to normal?”

“Y-yes!”

Earnest leaned forward, watching closely. She took a few steps toward her partner, almost putting out the flames on her head.

The Scion of Ice’s body was changing. There was a notable whooshing sound as the frozen, shattered fragments of ice gathered back together, regained their shape, and reformed into organs, bones, eyeballs, and skin. This familiar yet different restoration process disgusted Earnest, but she still watched every moment of it.

Soon, the layer of fat on Lunaria’s body was covered with skin, and…

Come on! Why do her breasts have to be that big, huh?

Earnest let her mind wander as she stared. The crucial part was coming up next.

“This is how I create my clothing.”

Crystals of ice covered Lunaria’s skin and formed a dress. As Earnest watched, a magnificent ice-themed costume came together. Lunaria’s nude body was only exposed to the male students’ gazes for a second or two—but that was fine, because these less-than-gentlemanly boys were in the process of being brutally murdered by Claire, Yessica, and Sophie.

“Oh! Aha! I see, I see!”

Now Earnest understood. And what Lunaria had done with ice, she could do with fire.

Easy peasy!

She wasted no time trying it out herself. First, she released her flame form, then she used the fire to cover her reconstituted body. Her aim was to create a dress of flame of her very own. But midway through the process…

“Ow! Ow! Hot, hot, hot, hot, hot!”

The fire was hot. Really hot. The flame dress on her body was broiling her newly reconstructed flesh. She rolled around on the ground like a sausage cooking on a grill, trying to put out the fire. It didn’t work. But just when the fire was about to claim her life, an exasperated Lunaria blew a gust of cold air at her.

Now she was close to freezing to death instead.

“I-I’m dying… I’m dying… C-Claire…”

“Why don’t you just go back into flame mode again?” said Lunaria.

She made it sound so easy. And it was, really. The moment Earnest transformed and then untransformed again, her body would be fully restored without the need for further healing. The thing was, to generate the flames required, she would need to drum up the requisite fighting force, and it was hard to concentrate when you were in pain from head to toe. Plus, half her body was burned to a crisp and the other half was frozen solid, leaving her with a dire lack of physical strength…

“Anna! I’ll heal you right now!”

Claire rushed over and began to restore her friend, only to have Lunaria stop her with a hand.

“Quit coddling her, Claire. If she can’t manage this on her own, let her rot on the ground and die. All this monster has is her stubbornness. If you took that away from her and threw it fifteen feet into the distance, what would be left? A half-burnt caterpillar, perhaps?”

Easy for her to say, thought the half-dead Earnest as she clung to life, panting.

“Earnest Flaming. If you believe yourself to be my rival, then stand up and fight. That is all I have to say to you.”

“Don’t…you…dare…mess…with…me!” Earnest converted her flare of anger into fighting force and instantly burst into flames again.

“Now, that’s what I expect from my destined rival.”

“Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! …None of that crap even matters right now!”

“Oh, but it matters a great deal. It’s so important. It is your duty, after all, to crawl around at this genius’s feet like the turgid, slimy snail you are, irritating me forever. That is the Earnest Flaming I want to see.”

Lunaria gave a lovely smile, but Earnest had other things on her mind.

“But you haven’t solved my problem at all! Your method for creating clothes is completely useless to me, moron!”

○Scene IV: Training Under Deemo

Clearly, Lunaria was useless. So Earnest was back to stomping around.

“Deemo! Are you there? Deemo! Where are you?!”

She threw open the door to the girls’ shower room and shouted at everyone inside. The girls just shook their heads—the ones who weren’t screaming in terror, that is—so Earnest kicked the door aside (it was barely hanging on by now anyway) and moved along.

“Deemo! Is this where you are?!”

Earnest burst into the men’s shower room, shouting at everyone inside. The boys just shook their heads—the ones who weren’t screaming in terror, that is—so Earnest kicked the door aside (it was barely hanging on by now anyway) and moved along.

“Deemo! Where are you?!”

Her roar shook the building. A spherical explosion of energy spread out around her at the speed of sound. And like an echo, an energy response came right back to her.

“Over there?!”

Earnest headed toward Deemo. She had just developed a brand-new active sonar technique, and she didn’t even realize it.

Deemo greeted Earnest as she lifted weights in the training room.

“Why are you here?” asked Earnest. “I thought training didn’t make magic beasts any stronger.”

“Yes, I thought so, too. But since I’m only half-beast, I figured I would give it a try…and it seems to be working. Quite well, in fact.”

With a heavy clang, she put her barbell back on the rack. According to the engraved numbers, it weighed in the high triple digits.

“Wow, you’re actually kind of a lightweight, aren’t you?” remarked Earnest.

Amplifying one’s muscles with spirit was a basic skill, one that anyone in the senior class could tap into. The amount of amplification, however, varied depending on one’s individual strengths and weaknesses. In Earnest’s case, if she removed the limiter she’d unconsciously placed on herself to protect her muscles and joints, she could easily bench press a literal ton.

Meanwhile, the self-proclaimed Overlord maxed out at just the high hundreds. Earnest was honestly surprised. Was Deemo this much of a wuss?

“I share my body with Maria, remember? Don’t you think I deserve praise for lifting this much as a brainiac-bookworm student council president? At first, you know, I maxed out at four-hundred-fifty pounds.”

“Whoa. Your average townsperson could lift that.”

“Really?”

“Um… I think so. They can, right? You don’t need spirit for numbers like that, surely…”

In Earnest’s case, she had been naturally emitting spirit since she was a young child, so she didn’t have any idea what the normal standard was.

“So…what did you need?” asked the Overlord.

“Oh! I wanted to ask you something. That moronic bastard-genius was completely useless to me.”

“Okay, so what is it?”

“Aw, are you gonna be mean to me, too, Deemo? C’mon, pleeease? ♡”

“I don’t know what you want unless you tell me.”

“Huh? Didn’t I already say it?”

“If memory serves, you didn’t.”

“What? No way!”

“Look, if you don’t need anything, I’ve got training to do.”

“No, no, no! I’m kidding! I’ll tell you, I’ll tell you! Wait, wait, wait!”

“I’m waiting.”

“Ummm… I’m sorry. It might be a little embarrassing for me.”

“Are you the most annoying person in the world or just the most annoying one of your species?” Deemo reached back for the barbell.

“No! I need you to teach me how to Materialize stuff!”

“Materialize?”

“Yeah! The thing you use to bust out clothes! Like what you’re wearing now!” Earnest thrust a finger toward Deemo’s body. “That’s not physical fabric, right? It’s more like…solidified spirit, yeah?”

“It’s not spirit. It’s miasma…though I guess it’s kind of like spirit. It’s what you humans call ‘vitality,’ I think. It’s the source of life for magic beasts.”

“Okay, I don’t really get all that. But if I can learn how to use it, I’ll be able to make clothing for myself anywhere, anytime, right? Then I won’t have to be the Red Avenger anymore!”

“This power isn’t meant for use as clothing.”

“That’s what you’re using it for, isn’t it?”

“The original use for Materialize is…”

With a whoosh, a black blade extended out from Deemo’s hand toward Earnest’s throat. The Materialize-crafted weapon began to sizzle and melt, burned by Earnest’s flames.

“…as a weapon, like this.”

“I bet it’d be useful for defense, too.”

“Magic beasts never defend. Anyone who cares about boosting their defenses isn’t a magic beast.”

“Being a magic beast sounds really annoying. Anyway, I want you to teach me how to do that.”

“The technique can only be used by magic beasts and, even then, only by high-ranking ones… Of course, I’m sure that won’t stop you.”

“We don’t know if I can do it unless we try, right? I’m the one who gets to decide whether I learn it or not it. I’m Earnest Flaming—the girl who never gives up.”

Deemo greeted this declaration with a sigh.

“All right. Let’s try to create some miasma first.”

Under Deemo’s guidance, Earnest worked on miasma creation and materialization for the next half hour or so. Ever so gradually, she began to produce results.

“Good. That’s right. The miasma’s getting thicker now. Keep going. You need to make it denser!”

“Nngh… Nngh… Evil things… Evil things… Evil thiiiiiings!”

Earnest bore down, thinking as hard as she could about things she didn’t like. Miasma, after all, was formed by the accumulation of negative energy—desire, rage, jealousy, rivalry, pride, gluttony, lust, laziness, and so on. And in Earnest’s case, the images that evoked the most negative emotions were…

Lunaria spewing out her usual venom.

Lunaria eating all the snacks Earnest had been saving up.

Lunaria hugging Blade tightly.

Lunaria…

Lunaria…

Lunaria…

“That contemptable wench…”

“Good, good. It’s building up. You almost have it materialized.”

Lunaria standing up, Earnest prone before her. Lunaria looking down at her with those eyes…

“Aaargh!”

“Yes! Now! Now, visualize the outfit you want to materialize!”

“Huh? The outfit? Um? Ummm…?!”

If Earnest wanted Blade’s eyes off Lunaria and on her instead, she would have to make a pretty sexy outfit… Whoa! No, no, no! Cancel, cancel!

The miasma had now reached a concentration sufficient to trigger rapid materialization. And at that exact moment, Earnest’s mind was filled with an image of something rather provocative. A lot like the outfit Deemo was wearing, in fact.

The costume solidified itself around her.

“Ooh… Ooh… I’ve got underboob and middleboob… Oooooh…”

A black, leatherlike membrane covered her body…but areas like the upper chest, the sides, and the back were all wide open, exposing the skin beneath. Her chest was very exposed, especially in the lower and valley areas, and it was rather…erotic.

“Wow. I can’t believe you actually did it,” said the Overlord.

“What’s that supposed to mean? You’re acting like you didn’t believe in me. Just who do you think I am? But, um, don’t you think this is a little too extreme?”

“No. By succubus standards, that’s fairly tame.”

“Since when am I a succubus?! …Hey, how do I change the design?”

“Well, it’s pretty hard once you’ve manifested it. You’ll run into memory capacity issues before too long. I don’t recommend it.”

“What? So…I’m just stuck like this forever?”

“If you don’t like it, you can go running around naked in that cloak like before.”

“No, no! This is fine! Wow, what a cute design! I, um… I love it? I love it! Thank you so much! Now no one will call me the Red Avenger anymore! Because I won’t let them!”

Earnest took Deemo’s hand and pumped it up and down.

“Thank you, Deemo! You’re the best teacher I ever had!”

“‘T-teacher’…?” The usually cool Deemo was taken aback by that word.

“Here, I’m gonna go show everybody right now!”

Earnest ran off, leaving Deemo alone in the training room.

“Hmm… A teacher, huh? I like the sound of that.”

The Overlord balled up a hand and stroked her hair over and over, like a cat washing its face.

○Scene V: The Big Reveal

“Okay, here I go! Watch closely, now.”

Earnest was already unconsciously covering her chest as she addressed the group. To properly demonstrate her Materialize skills, she naturally had to get naked, so this little reveal event was taking place in the thermae. Going around the Proving Ground or a school building in her birthday suit would be kind of weird, but it was only natural to be nude in the bath…right?

Starting from her naked form, Earnest slowly began to produce the necessary miasma from her body. The cause of her negative emotions was right there in front of her, after all. Lunaria was watching, so Earnest didn’t even need to imagine her. In fact, Lunaria was standing with her arms crossed, looking at Earnest with a “go ahead and do it if you can, you stupid ape” expression on her face. (At least, that was how Earnest saw it.) It couldn’t have been a more encouraging setup. Producing vast clouds of miasma under these conditions would be like taking candy from a baby. Almost too easy.

Once she had enough density, Earnest compressed the miasma she had generated and set it in place. Once again, she reached the point she had with Deemo earlier. She created matter from nothing, materializing a suit to cover her naked body—in other words, she’d made clothing.

“Well? What do you think?!” she said.

She stood up straight, exposing her entire body to everyone’s gaze like a fashion model. Sure, the outfit was a little sexy, but she’d made clothes! So there!

“Hey, uh…” Blade was the first to speak.

“Yeah, I know,” added Yessica as she looked at the others in turn.

“Yeah… That sure is clothing…” Clay picked up the baton in this relay race of furtive glances. Then he quickly passed it on to Kassim.

“Well, um, I don’t think it’s that weird.”

“Don’t be mean, Kassim,” said Claire, reprimanding him.

Huh? ‘Mean’? What are they all talking about? I worked so hard to pick up this new Materialize skill, and now I’m showing it off to everyone…and this is what I get?

Instead of looking surprised, or impressed, or praising her, her classmates were just giving her awkward looks. Claire even used the word “mean” when scolding Kassim.

Huh? What’s going on…?

Now Earnest wasn’t sure what to think.

“Still, though…it’s quite a sight,” said Blade.

Ahh! Finally, someone praised me! And it was Blade, too!

Praise me more! Praise me, praise me!♡

“I mean,” he continued, “I’ve never seen a human master Materialize before.”

Huh? A super-being like him, and it’s his first time? Now that’s praise, right?

“What?” Yessica’s voice rang out. “Not even you, Blade? That’s crazy!”

“Yeah,” added Clay seriously, “I hate to say it, but she’s becoming more and more monstrous by the day…”

That seems kind of mean, actually.

“Come on, everyone,” Kassim said to the group. “Whether she’s a scion or a magic beast, she’s still our Empress, isn’t she? We’re all friends here, right? So stop saying stuff like that.”

Was this Kassim’s way of protecting her? Was he taking her side here?

“My lady… Truly, truly marvelous. Even if you are stained by darkness, even if you lose your humanity…you will always be beautiful to me.”

Leonard was spouting his usual nonsense. These cheesy pickup lines were pretty much his standard operating procedure. Even worse, the actual content wasn’t very encouraging.

You really are a useless stud, aren’t you? At least push back a little…

“N-no, um… I mean, this technique…wasn’t that hard to pick up. I bet all of you could learn it with enough practice. Why don’t you try?”

“Forget it,” Blade said. “It’s impossible for humans. Creating miasma requires a whole set of species-specific traits. That’s why I said I’ve never seen anything like it before.”

The super-being had now weighed in, and “impossible” was his final judgment.

“Well…um…congrats on becoming an upper-level magical being, Anna.”

“Congratulations!”

“Congrats!”

“Yeah, good one!”

“Whoo-hoo!” shouted Cú. “You’re one of us now!”

Cú was the only one who sounded remotely enthusiastic. The others’ cheers died down almost immediately.

“Here, Blade, I’ll wash your back for you.”

“Oh! Thanks, Clay.”

“I need to wash my hair, actually. Anyone bring any shampoo with them?”

“I can lend you mine, Yessica. Do you mind citrus aroma?”

“I got some soap here. Can’t you just use that?”

“Are you really that stupid, Blade? I mean, really?”

No one was looking at Earnest anymore. They were too busy washing up, lathering their hair, scrubbing each other’s backs, and so forth. Earnest, meanwhile, was just standing there, all alone, her feelings ignored.

The way everyone was politely ignoring her only made it all hurt worse. It was clear that no one would call her the Red Avenger again, but now she wasn’t so sure that was a good thing. Perhaps she’d done away with something she really shouldn’t have.

○Scene I: Girl Talk

It was a typical evening in Earnest’s room. All the girls were gathered in a circle on the floor, chatting and snacking. Each of them had their favorite cushion behind their back or under their butt, which they hugged tightly whenever they said something like “ahhh!” or “no waaay!”

“Besides…you know him,” muttered Earnest in between mouthfuls of snacks. She was sitting with one knee up, putting her panties on full display beneath her negligee. It wasn’t a very proper position for a woman, but this was a girls’ gathering. She was being joined tonight by Yessica, Claire, Sophie, Iona, Deemo, and Lunaria—all close friends, lifelong rivals, or both. There was no reason to be shy around this group.

There were no guys here tonight, either. It would’ve been weird if a boy tried to sneak into a girls’ party, though Blade would occasionally join in like it was the most natural thing in the world. He didn’t even really listen to them; he was only there to scarf up the snacks. He was such a child.

“Why is he such a child anyway?” Earnest asked indignantly before stuffing another handful of food into her mouth.

“Aww, but that’s what makes Blade so interesting, isn’t it?” said Claire. “Don’t you agree, Yessica?”

“Huh? You’re asking me? Well… I guess it is cute, in a way… Okay, Deemo next.”

“Mmm. I can’t speak for Maria, but my spirit has only been fully manifested for five years, so I think I’d be a perfect match for his five-year-old mind. Now you, Sophie.”

“If Blade is happy, then I am happy, too. Iona.”

“I think I have just realized something. In terms of both mental age and actual age, my master is younger than me.”

“How old are you?” asked Earnest.

“Hee-hee-hee… Never ask a Guardian or a Berserker their age. Do you want me to round to the nearest thousand or the nearest million?”

“Never mind.”

“Hee-hee-hee! But thinking about how he is younger than me makes my love for him flow even more torrentially. No, I cannot help but interrupt these feelings, place them in a call stack, and remove the AES decryption from them.”

“Whatever that means. What about you, Luna?”

“Um… Actually, how old is Blade now?”

“We celebrated his seventeenth birthday a little while back. Mentally, though, five seems rather generous.”

“Oh, he’s younger than me? Hmm. So we’re his big sisters here at school?”

“That’s right. We’re all his big sisters!” Earnest giggled. “But even if his childishness is what people like about him, doesn’t that mean he’s out of the running? If his mental age is five now, how many more years will it take for him to become interested in girls? Ten?”

“No way. Boys are already proper men from around age twelve.” Yessica waved her hands to make her point, revealing a hint of her vaunted “wealth of experience.”

“Huh? Really? So seven more years… Ugh. We’ll be twenty-five by then. What should we do about this?”

To the eighteen-year-old Earnest, turning twenty-five was unthinkable, something that only happened to other people. It meant her current self would die well before Blade would so much as look at her.

Earnest let out a deep sigh. “Haaah… I wish we could do it, though.”

Claire spat out her tea. Yessica jumped, her eyes emitting a catlike sparkle.

“What? What do you want to do, huh? C’mon, tell us!”

“Huh? I mean go on a date, of course… Hey! What did you think I was saying?!”

“Oh, that?” Yessica immediately lost interest.

Claire, meanwhile, was still struggling after some tea went down the wrong pipe. Her toes were twitching, even. Death was almost upon her, until Deemo finally held her upside down and Iona bravely stepped in to give CPR.

“What a girly girl you are,” Yessica told Earnest as they watched.

“Hey! Don’t say that! It’s not like I really wanna go on a d-date with him!”

“But that’s perfectly normal for a girly girl.”

“Again, stop! You keep calling me a girly girl all the time, Yessica, but you never even tell me what you mean. I’ve been a fighter and martial artist for eighteen years, you know. Right, Luna?”

“Huh? Why drag me into this? But…yes, I’ve been a genius for eighteen years myself. But lately, I’ve come to realize that I am a woman first, a genius second. It certainly gives one pause, yes… I never truly thought about it before, but perhaps I should have studied matters like how men and women ask each other out. That said, I am a genius. One look, and I’ll immediately have it down.”

“You said ‘genius’ three times just now. That’s exactly why I hate geniuses.”

Earnest chugged her herbal tea. It was the kind meant to calm your nerves and help you get a good night’s sleep.

“But, say,” she continued casually, “what’re dates like anyway? Have any of you ever been on one?”

Everyone froze. They stared at Earnest, their gazes dead serious.

“Huh? What? No one?”

Nobody raised their hand.

“You have, haven’t you, Sophie?”

“I can hardly call that a normal date,” Sophie said with a shake of her head. Blade had asked her out, jumping to the conclusion that the life of a normal teen was all about dating. But he’d set it up like a boot camp, complete with a schedule planned down to the last minute. There was no way you could call that a “date” in the usual sense.

“Huh? No? You don’t have any experience, either?”

Earnest was addressing Lunaria now. This girl, this genius… She was the “Empress” at her previous school. She’d been surrounded by boys, the horrid witch.

“If you mean asking male students for help carrying my shopping bags, then yes, I do have experience…but that’s not what we’re talking about here, is it?”

“Of course not.”

Iona, Deemo, and Maria didn’t even need to be asked. That just left Claire. Earnest turned her gaze toward her other best friend.

“Um… I’ve been thinking I’d like to try dating, too, yeah.” Claire brought both index fingers in front of her chest, tapping them together as she spoke. “You know, go shopping, eat somewhere, and then, and thennnn…”

“No way,” said Yessica.

“Yeah, she’s right.” Earnest nodded. “No way.”

After the time they’d had a race to see who could help Blade get the most rest and Claire had decided to take him on a girls’ shopping trip followed by a girls’ meal out, she was now branded “Least Likely to Ever Get a Date Again” by all her peers. On the totem pole of dating skills, Claire was kissing the ground.

“Hah… So, like, it’s really true? The only one of us who’s ever been on an actual date is Yessica?”

“Huh? Me?”

“I mean, you have, right? Of course you have.”

“Ummm, yeah…”

Yessica gave Earnest a vague nod. Everybody saw her as the voice of experience, something Yessica herself had never confirmed nor denied.

“Ahhh…” Earnest looked up at the ceiling. “I wonder what it feels like to go on a date.”

She’d meant that question for Yessica, but her target was looking up at a different corner of the ceiling, making little fwoo sounds like she was silently whistling.

“Like, what’s a normal date like?”

Fwoo.

“I really want to know. I do. Doesn’t anyone here know?”

Fwoo.

“Give us some guidance, Yessica!” With a clap of her hands, Earnest set off the chorus.

“Right! Show us how you do it!”

“Huh? How I do it…?!”

“Please! Please! Please!” Earnest kept begging her, clapping with every beat. Everyone else followed suit and bowed to Yessica, as if worshiping some divine idol. “Please, Yessica!”

“Hmm… As the Overlord, I will advise you that I rarely ask other people for advice…and when I do, I expect to be rewarded.”

“I would like to know as well. I am prepared to use my high-spec functionality to learn all the necessary steps, and I hope I will be given the opportunity to do so.”

“Yes, and I, too, would perhaps be interested to see how commoners go about their dates.”

“C’mon, Sophie! You too!”

“I would like…to see an example, yes. I messed up my chance, so…”

Earnest, Claire, Lunaria, Deemo, Iona, and even Sophie were now treating Yessica like a living god…and she had no choice but to nod back.

○Scene II: The Big Ask

It was morning, and everyone was gathered in the classroom.

“Yessica! Yessica! Look! Blade’s here! He’s over there! I see him!”

“Anna, calm down.”

A girl couldn’t go on a date unless she asked a boy out. The group had walked in here earlier that morning, armed with a promise that their newly anointed teacher would show them what to do, and now they had finally encountered Blade.

“All right. Watch carefully, okay?” said Yessica.

“Yes! Yes, yes!”

Everyone nodded. Yessica, taking the cue, walked over to Blade.

“Hiii, Blaaade… ♡” She waved her fingers around in a morning greeting.

“Oh, morning, Yessica.”

“Hey, wanna go on a date?”

“Oh, you bet.”

“Huh?! Whoa! Wait!” Earnest jumped in. “That… That was so fast! What happened just now?! Why did he give such a quick response?! Why did the whole thing end so suddenly?!”

“What’s up with her?” Blade asked, pointing at Earnest.

“I told you, Earnest, there’s no need to get all worked up,” said Lunaria. “It’s just a date, okay?”

“Ugh! You sound like someone from another world! ‘My, I’ve been on so many dates I can’t even recall the number!’ What was that about?!”

“I didn’t say that.”

“Hello? What’s going on here?” Blade was still pointing at Earnest.

“Oh, she’s been acting a little weird since last night. Don’t worry about it. What you should be looking at, Blade, is your dating partner.” Yessica held Blade’s face between her hands, turning him toward her. “This date, you see, doesn’t end until you’re back home. And it began the moment you said yes to my invitation.”

“Oh, it did?”

“Yes, it did.”

Yessica sat down on Blade’s lap, settling in like it was a perfectly natural spot for her.

“H-his lap! She’s sitting on it! Wow! What advanced techniques!” Earnest spoke aloud despite herself, trembling with excitement as she pointed at them.

Man, Blade thought, she sure is noisy. Just like always.

“So when are we going?” Yessica whispered into his ear. “And when?”

“Whoa! Your face! It’s so close to his! Wow! So close!”

…Shut up, thought Blade.

“Hmm… Well, how about tomorrow?” suggested Blade.

“Okay. Tomorrow.”

“So tomorrow we’ll meet at the tower at noon sharp, and then we’ll commence operation at twelve-oh-five hours—”

Before he could fall into that rut again, Yessica tapped at his lips with her fingertips.

“No. Not like that.”

“Whoa! His lips! You’re touching them! You’re touching his lips!”

Seriously, shut up.

“Huh? No good? But that’s the only way I know how—”

Yessica’s fingers crossed his lips again. “In that case, let your big sis teach you how, hmmm? ♡”

“‘Your big sis’?! You called yourself his big sister?! Wow! ‘Your big sis’! Did you hear that, everyone?”

I mean it. Shut up.

“O-okay…”

Blade could only nod back at Yessica’s smile, much too close to his own lips for comfort.

○Scene III: At the Meeting Spot

It was Sunday, a few minutes before noon, and Blade was spacing out beneath the clock tower. The city was bustling, the perfect time for a date.

The appointed hour was drawing near, but Yessica still hadn’t arrived. Soon, though, there was a ticking sound from the clock above, followed by a series of booming rings. It was noon, yet there was still no sign of Yessica.

Normally, Blade would be panicking, thinking, She’s late, and now our plans at twelve-oh-five might be ruined! But Yessica had told him “not like that,” so he’d refrained from making any plans. The schedule in his mind was a blank sheet of paper—and with nothing to worry about, he felt perfectly at peace waiting for Yessica.

Hmm. This is actually pretty nice.

“Hiii, Blaaade! ♡” It took around ten more minutes for Yessica to show up. “Have you been waiting long?”

“What do you think? You’re ten minutes and thirty-seven seconds late.”

He was only giving her the facts. It was rewarded with her pressing a finger against his lips.

“In situations like this, you’re supposed to say something like ‘no, it’s fine; I just got here, too,’ all right?”

“I am?”

“Yes, you are. If you’re a good man.”

“Oh.”

Blade was impressed. He filed this factoid away in the back of his head. An ex-Hero like him was a sponge for knowledge. Clearly, the tactic being played was to give false information to the other party for…some reason.

“No, it’s fine. I just got here myself.” He thought for a bit, then decided to give a fabricated reason for his lateness. “I was so excited about our date, I couldn’t sleep at all last night.”

That was false intelligence. He had actually slept like a rock, just like he usually did.

“Hmm… Okay, you passed,” Yessica said, eyes wide.

She’d given him a passing grade. That made him happy. If he had a stamp card hanging from his neck and Yessica had stamped a big checkmark on it, he would’ve felt even more gratified.

“By the way, Yessica…”

“Yes?”

“You didn’t, um…how do you put it…dress up or anything?”

Blade looked her up and down, but he couldn’t find anything different from usual. He checked all the usual trip-up points, looking for a different belt buckle or a different knee-high sock on one leg, but everything was just the same as always. The color and pattern of her toenail polish had changed, but Yessica did that on a daily basis, so it didn’t really count as “dressing up.” Or…did those changing colors and patterns have some kind of cryptic meaning, and picking up on it would make him seem “fashionable” or whatever? If that was the case, it was too tough a nut to crack, even for an ex-Hero. Code breaking was more the work of intelligence agents, anyway.

“Dress up? No, nothing like that. Did you want me to?”

“No. I mean, I’d love to have seen it, but…”

Once again, Blade said something contrary to the facts, following the example he was given for “correct responses while on a date.” Girls, he knew, dressed up for dates. That was just something he had learned, though; he didn’t exactly know what it meant to “dress up.” He’d assumed Yessica would provide a good example to learn from today.

“You didn’t dress up, either, did you, Blade?”

“Huh? Guys do that, too?”

“Of course they do. If I was the only one who dressed up, you’d stick out like a sore thumb. What would we have done then, huh?”

“Ooh. I sure don’t want that.”

“Right? And a good woman makes sure she doesn’t embarrass her man.”

“I see.” Blade understood now. Yessica was just being considerate.

“Thank you,” he said with a smile.

Yessica looked away for a moment. “S-sure!”

She hurriedly nodded back, as if she had lost her composure for a moment…and that was how Blade and Yessica’s date began.

○Scene IV: The Tailers

A group watched the two of them from behind as they kicked off their date.

“Ugh, Yessica… They’re just walking side by side now? …Oh! They’re holding hands! She took his arm! She took it!”

“Wh-wh-wh-what is she doing? Wait a minute! Isn’t she being a little too clingy? She’s supposed to just be showing us an example! Stop it! Stop! …What the?!”

“Normally, it’d be Yessica snidely rebuffing you right now. I kind of miss her presence.”

“With my high-spec capabilities, it would be no problem for me to play the role of the joke teller. To do that correctly, however, I would need an ancient weapon known as a ‘punch line.’”

Some of the more interested girls had joined together to engage in what was essentially public stalking. They had secretly followed Sophie during her own date long ago, but the purpose of this one was for Yessica to provide an example to them on how to act. As a result, this “stalking” was agreed upon in advance and factored into all their behavior today. The girls were openly following Yessica, and if they were half hiding behind a streetlight right now, well, they were just having a little fun.

“Here are your rations.”

“Huh? What are these for, Sophie?” Earnest looked at the fried treat being handed to her.

“…Isn’t it standard procedure to be given a snack and some milk when you’re tailing someone?”

“…Huh? Oh, right. We ate something like this last time, didn’t we? …Wait, you saw us?”

Sophie silently nodded as Earnest took the offering.

“Mmm. I really do like this, though. This fried thing with the sweet black stuff in it. You should try this, too, Claire. It’ll help you chill out.”

“Ah! Ahh! Yessica’s practically glued to him! They’re going cheek to cheek! Look, Anna! Her cheek! His cheek! Cheek to cheek! Yessica must love Blade so much— Mmmph!”

Earnest stuffed the snack filled with sweet bean paste into Claire’s mouth, silencing her.

Wait. What? She said something at the end about Blade and Yessica, right? What was it?

No. It can’t be true. If it were, I never would’ve asked Yessica for this demonstration in the first place. Seriously, Claire, what’re you talking about? Like that’s something to celebrate? What if this keeps going or gets even worse? Huh? That’ll be a problem. A big problem.

Mmm… At least this snack’s good, though. Why does everything sweet have to be bad for you? It’s so soothing…

“Whoa! Yessica! She said you shouldn’t go shopping with a guy, but they just went right into that store!”

“Oh, they sure did.”

Earnest came to her senses when Claire pulled on her sleeve. Yessica and Blade were about to enter a clothing store.

○Scene V: Shopping

“You know…I’ve never picked my own clothes before.”

That was Blade’s first remark as he stood in front of the rows of racks.

“Fashion isn’t really that tough. You’re expressing yourself, you know? You should just wear whatever clothes you like, in any way you like. That’s all, really.”

Yessica’s cheerful tone made it sound so simple. Ever since his days as a Hero, Blade’s clothing and armor had been provided to him, preventing him from ever choosing his own. He didn’t even know how to choose or what kind of clothes he liked, for that matter. He knew selecting based on how much defense his clothing offered wasn’t the right move here, but otherwise, he was lost.

“Do you think I like this outfit?” He was pointing at the school uniform he was wearing.

“Well, if you don’t know, I can teach you a good way to figure it out.”

“Teach me, yeah.”

“If something makes your heart race, choose that.”

“My heart race? That’s a pretty high standard…”

“Okay, then how about whatever makes your heart skip a beat?”

“Skip a beat? I don’t think I really get that, either.”

Hmm… Wait a minute.

“I think I like this uniform,” he said, pulling at the one he had on.

“All right. What do you like about it?”

“The way it seems so normal!”

Uniforms were good. In fact, they were amazing. Having a uniform meant everyone wore the same thing. Whoever thought up uniforms was just incredible. Blade had so much respect for them.

Back in his Hero era, he was always wearing this one-of-a-kind armor, things that existed nowhere else in the world. It’d always break pretty quickly on him, though, unable to withstand the rigors of intense battle. Then he’d just switch to some other one-of-a-kind item. One after another. Endlessly.

“Hmm, okay. Then how about this?” Yessica hummed to herself as she held a shirt up to Blade’s chest.

“What’s this?”

“Just a regular shirt. The normal medium size, right off the rack. See?” She pointed behind her. There, on the rack, were several shirts with the same pattern, all lined up in a row.

“Wow. Awesome! It’s so ordinary!”

“So, here, I can pick out a normal shirt and normal pants for you, okay? You know, I’ll just choose stuff that matches.”

“Okay! Sure!”

Blade gave Yessica several enthusiastic nods. Somehow, being with Yessica made him feel totally natural. At ease, even.

Earnest and the others continued to tail Blade and Yessica.

“Yessica told us that we shouldn’t go shopping. I’m sure of it. But here she is! Shopping!”

Claire didn’t know what to do with herself. Previously, she had been branded a “crap dater” for taking Blade shopping.

“Yeah, but it’s not like she’s shopping for herself, is she?”

Earnest peeked inside the store to check. During Claire’s date, she had been excitedly running around, buying clothes and cute things for herself and making Blade carry it all for her. Right now, Yessica was just buying clothes for Blade.

“Oh. So if you help the guy shop for stuff, that’s allowed? Shopping as entertainment? …I’ll keep that in mind.”

“Huh? What’s the difference, though?” Claire didn’t seem to understand.

Earnest had no choice but to spell it out for her.

“Look, stay back, okay? This would be impossible for you.”

“Wow, harsh…”

“Oh… They’re both coming out.”

Earnest and the others quickly hid. The two of them had agreed to be tailed, so there was no need to hide, but… Well, it was just so awkward whenever their eyes met.

The couple left the store and headed toward the opposite end of the block, avoiding the streetlight their tailers were all stacked up behind. The group moved from one light to the next, continuing their surveillance as they maintained a constant distance from their targets. A child approached them, looking amused, but they shooed him away. A stray dog came up to pee on them, but they shooed it away, too.

“Blade looks so happy,” said Sophie.

“He’s interested in clothing?” said Earnest. “I’ve never seen him in anything but his school uniform.”

“Hmm. So a good woman knows how to make her man smile,” muttered Lunaria. “That’s pretty tough. I’m learning a lot today.”

“Well, I can make him smile, too,” protested Earnest. “I always do. Whenever I give him a massage, he’s always got this big, goofy smile on his face. Did you know that? Hey, did you? You didn’t, did you?”

“Oh, they joined arms again.”

“What?” Earnest turned around at Lunaria’s observation and glared at the couple.

“Whoa, don’t do that, Anna. We’re just here to watch over them, remember?” Claire did her best to calm Earnest down.

“Oh, they’re going into another clothing store. Women’s this time.”

“Huh? Isn’t that exactly what I did? Seriously, why is it okay for Yessica but not for me?”

“You stop glaring at them, too, Claire!” said Earnest.

“You’re the one making us.”

“Shhh! You’re both distracting me!”

“Hey, does this look good on me?”

“Looks great!”

“Okay, you pass.”

“Heh-heh!”

Blade knew how this process worked: The girl would try on some clothes and, once she opened the curtains, he’d give his appraisal. Whenever she tried a new outfit on, he had to say “yes, it suits you,” no matter what. That was enough to earn him a passing grade each time. He was starting to feel a little pleased with himself.

“How about this one?”

The curtains closed and opened again, and Yessica struck another pose. This time, the outfit covered a lot less skin than the previous one. But Blade didn’t hesitate. He knew the rules, and he followed them once again.

“Looks great on you.”

“No, not quite. You should say ‘wow, that’s sexy,’ or ‘that’s really hot,’ or something.”

“Oh, I should?” Another new lesson learned!

“Hey… Blade?”

“Yeah?”

Yessica brushed her hair back, stood straight up, and changed her pose again. “Does this rile you up at all?”

“Rile me up how?”

“Hmm, maybe it’s still a little too soon for you.”

“Too soon how?”

Yessica whisked the curtains shut again. “You can peek if you want.”

“…Why would I do that?”

Blade raised a confused eyebrow. Why would he want to peek? For what purpose?

○Scene VI: Having a Drink

“Oh, look! This place sure brings back memories.” Yessica suddenly stopped as they were walking through town. “See? You came here before, didn’t you?”

“Yeah,” replied Blade as he looked. It was the Parlor, the little food place on the street. He recalled stopping here while on a date with Sophie. But if Yessica said it brought back “memories,” that would imply she had been there, too…

“Wanna have a drink?”

“No, I’m fine—”

Blade stopped himself, recalling what Yessica had told him about being considerate while on a date.

“Are you thirsty, Yessica?”

“A little.”

“Let’s get something to drink, then. That’s the obvious choice.”

Krrrk…

The metal streetlight was now dented in the shape of a curled finger.

“Whoa, Sophie. Calm down. Calm down, okay?”

“I am calm.”

“You dented it. You dented it. You just twisted up a streetlight. Just what the heck is your grip strength?”

Earnest wasn’t sure whether to laugh or sigh in despair. Now it was Sophie losing her temper. She had been watching quietly so far, but when the two of them ordered juice, it set something off in her.

Earnest knew this place. It was the Parlor where Sophie and Blade went on a date and drank juice offerings with embarrassing names like “Lovely Infinite” whatever.

“Hey, Sophie?”

“What?”

“If Blade’s happy, isn’t that good enough?”

“If Blade is happy, that is all I need.”

“Then why did you crumple up that streetlight?”

“If Blade is happy, that is all I need.”

It wasn’t really an answer, but Earnest understood her well enough. Sophie kept a generally indifferent attitude around Blade—almost frighteningly so, at times. But as Earnest now saw, she wasn’t so different from the rest of them. She began to feel a sense of kinship with the girl.

See, Sophie? You’re just barely holding it back, too.

The Lovely Infinite Tropical—a large glass of juice with two straws—was in front of Blade once more.

“Did you know this is meant for couples?”

“Yeah, I know.”

“Do you know what the term ‘couple’ means?”

“Sure. It’s a man and a woman in a group. Just like me and you, Yessica. We’re a couple now.”

Blade pointed first at his chest, then as Yessica’s.

“Aww… That’s so cute of you, Blade. Okay, um…so did you know this drink’s meant not just for couples, but for couples who’re in love?”

“Huh?” He hadn’t known that. “Well…I don’t really understand ‘love,’ so…”

“Ooh. Time for a little discussion about love, huh?”

“Well, love is…um, it’s the same thing as liking something a lot, isn’t it?”

“It’s close to that. In terms of being the kind of ‘like’ that isn’t ‘liking’ a friend, you pretty much have it right.”

Okay. He had it correct so far. “So basically, it’s like mating or something like that?”

His doctor often engaged in those kinds of activities. Courtship rituals. And if courting was asking someone to mate, then that meant love must be at least pretty close to mating.

“Well, um, no, that’s not quite what I meant. That’s being a little too blunt.”

“Oh, it’s different?”

“No, I mean… It’s close, but not quite.”

“Which is it?”

Blade looked around the street. There were a lot of couples. It was Sunday afternoon, and around a quarter of the people walking past them were male-female pairs—in other words, couples.

Blade pointed to one of the pairs. “What about them? Are they a couple in love?”

“Not yet.”

“Not yet?”

That sounded vague to him. “Yet”? What does “yet” mean, exactly?

“So what about that one?” he asked, pointing again.

“Yeah, they’re doing it.”

This time, the answer was clear. Wow. A couple who’s already mated! What a discovery!

“And that one?”

“Doing it. Like, dozens of times. I mean, they’re married, so it’s natural.”

“Dozens of times!”

That’s amazing! Wow! They’ve probably done a lifetime’s worth of mating!

“But why are you quizzing me about how many times random couples have done it? Is this a quiz, or am I a sex sommelier, or what?”

“Huh? Oh. It’s just fun, is all.”

“Hey, Blade…do you want to, like, mate with me, maybe?” Yessica propped her head up with an arm against the table, put her little finger in her mouth, and asked the question point-blank.

“…Hmmm?”

Blade folded his arms, thinking it over. It felt like a pretty tough question.

“Hey, what’re they talking about?”

Now it was Earnest on edge. Among them, only Sophie and Iona had the secret-agent skills and/or high-spec machinery to hear the couple’s conversation from this far away.

Both of them were doing just that right now, but they seemed surprisingly calm. Sophie was muttering a spell under her breath along the lines of “if Blade is happy, that is all I need…if Blade is happy, that is all I need…if Blade is happy, that is all I need,” over and over again, but otherwise, she seemed fine.

“Hey, so what’re they saying? Tell me! You have to tell me! I have a right to know, don’t I?”

“You’d better not listen.”

“Why not?!”

“You should stay back. You couldn’t handle it.”

“Ughhh!”

○Scene VII: The Grown-Up Date♡

Yessica and Blade had gone shopping, shared a “couples” drink, then had fun in a few other places. They played games for couples, ate fast food for couples, and had a street artist draw a couples sketch for them.

“All right, Blade, where to next? What do you wanna do?”

“Well, we’ve already had a lot of fun…”

Their dorm’s curfew was drawing near. Blade looked up toward the clock tower. It was usually visible from most locations across the city, but in this back alley, it was just out of sight.

“Did all that fun tire you out?” asked Yessica.

“Huh? No…”

Blade was about to say he wasn’t tired, but then he stopped himself. He knew by now that giving his partner false information was what made him “kind” and a “good guy” in this scenario. Yessica had beaten that much into him today.

“Well, a little, yeah.”

“Then let’s take a break and relax.”

She pulled his arm gently, before abruptly coming to a stop. Now she was looking at what appeared to be an ordinary building. Blade didn’t know what it was for, but there were signs on it reading things like LOVE HOTEL and REST STOP.

Was this where they were going to have fun next? What did Yessica say again? She wanted to have a break? Well, this was the spot, then, right? It said REST STOP right on the sign and everything. This had to be it.

“Huh? What’s up?” he asked.

Yessica turned toward him. At first, her face looked blank. Was she encouraging him, or was she completely oblivious? Blade wasn’t sure. He felt like she was telling him to decide for them.

Hmm. Hmm. Hmm.

He wasn’t actually tired at all. But he had already told Yessica that he was, and he couldn’t go back on it now. Would a good guy suggest they rest here? Or would it better to say “actually, never mind”? Which was the right answer? He wanted Yessica to smile and say “you pass” to him again. What choice would make him a “good man”? He was stumped. Blade thought about it.

Hmm. Hmm. Hmm…

The public tailing was still ongoing.

“Um, you know…like…this might be a misunderstanding on my part, but…” Earnest pointed her index finger at her chest. “Over there… They’re trying to figure out whether to go in or not, right? That place… It’s not really a store. It’s more like a hotel. It’s got all those fancy lights, but it feels kinda sketchy, too. Really weird. If my guess is correct, um…could that be…?”

“Earnest, I have to say that your guess is highly likely to be correct. Even without hearing your assumption, I understand perfectly what you are trying to say, because I am a high-spec machine.”

“Huh? Huh? Huh? Huhhh? I-I’m right? So it is that?!”

“What? Umm…? Wh-what is it?” asked Lunaria. “Hello? Hey, I’m here, too! Someone explain it so I can understand, too! Please!”

“If Blade is happy, that is all I need.”

“Whoa…?! Sophie! No! You can’t mean that! You’re really fine with this?”

“I’m not, but…it’s fine.”

“No it’s not!” insisted Earnest. Even if the whole world said yes, she would’ve shouted no—and that was the sort of determination that decided her next move.

Blade decided to stop stewing over it.

“Okay, I’ve decided. Listen, I—”

Just as he was about to give Yessica his eagerly-awaited answer…

“You will decide nothing!”

“Grrhh!”

Blade was hit with a drop kick to the side, sending him flying several yards away. He had sensed the kick coming about half a second before it hit him, giving him ample time to avoid it—but he decided to take it on purpose, given how angry the Empress seemed to be.

“Ow. Why’d you come in from the side like that?”

He got up slowly. He hadn’t been caught off guard by her attack, and even if he had been, he couldn’t call himself a Hero if he’d taken any damage from a kick like that. Not that he was a Hero anymore. He was just an incredibly, totally ordinary guy, hemming and hawing in front of the rest stop.

“Don’t just decide like that! You… You super-being freak! You need to act like a normal human for a change! You need to hesitate! Agonize over it! Go back and forth! Anything!”

“Why are you so angry?”

“I’m not angry! I just came over to stop you! …Yessica!” Earnest pointed at her next. “You said you were just gonna demonstrate how to go on a date with someone! Why are you making it into this huge, serious thing? Are you crazy?!”

“Well, you know, if this is an adult date … Just having fun, eating, then saying ‘later’ doesn’t really feel like enough. Like there’s some, um, unfinished business…”

“It’s finished! It’s over! All the way! So stop! Seriously, stop!”

“Oh? …Did I look that serious to you?”

“You sure as hell did!”

“Oh. Well…maybe you’re right,” Yessica said, shooting her a mischievous wink.

“Huh? Really…?” Earnest turned to face her, looking startled.

“…Hey, Blade. Did you think I was serious?”

Blade shrugged at this sudden question. He had no idea what she meant. Serious about what? What was she being serious (or not serious) about?

“…Anyway!” Earnest cleared her throat. “It’s time, people! Let’s go home!”

“Ow. Ow. Hey, that hurts! You’re gonna tear my ear off!” Blade rightfully protested this treatment from the Empress.

“If I do, I’ll have Claire fix it later! Okay? Let’s go! We’re going back! No breaks! No rest stops on the way!”

And so, Blade was dragged away, Earnest pulling him relentlessly. And as she dragged him along, she looked all around, including above.

“That applies to all of you, too! Let’s go!”

The only ones openly following the couple were Earnest, Claire, Sophie, Iona, and Lunaria. Now a few others, who had been following them much more stealthily, popped up from behind buildings and other cover, grouping together as they left.

Once she saw them all go, Earnest turned toward Yessica. “…Ah! And Yessica! Thanks a lot for today! Sorry to ask so much of you! I learned a whole lot!”

“You’re quite welcome.”

Yessica beamed, but there was something more than a little inscrutable to her smile.

○Scene I: Errand Boy, or Apprentice Wanted

It was a typical afternoon at the Proving Ground, with Blade and Earnest clashing swords.

“Your swordplay’s been improving lately.”

“Really? You know flattery won’t work on me.”

“I wasn’t trying to flatter you. I’m just stating a fact.”

“Hee-hee…! Glad to hear, then.”

Earnest smiled between swings. Up to now, her sword style could be described as bombastic at best, sloppy at worst. The indestructible nature of her magic sword made her too complacent, driving her to swing it around with sheer brute force. She had already broken Asmodeus once because of it, and after that incident, her fighting style had started to change.

“I just learned by how you use your sword.”

“All I’m doing,” Blade replied, “is holding back.”

He was trying to baby his sword; it was true. If he got serious with it, even a single blow would shatter it. Even now, when he applied the brakes all the way down to 18 percent, there weren’t a lot of swords that could withstand the unbridled force of an ex-Hero in this kingdom. The weapons issued at the academy were probably quite magically powerful by ordinary standards…but he still needed to give them careful handling and attention to ensure they didn’t break so easily. The blades from his Hero days were all legends, or even legends within legends, so he used to whirl them around with abandon, just like Earnest did in her “barbarian” era.

Now, though, Earnest was learning a lot from Blade’s energy-saving techniques. It might come in handy for her someday—for example, if she ever went to a more normal school and took classes using normal swords.

“Hey, lady! Teach me! Hey! Ahhh! Look over here!”

Earnest stopped in her tracks once she heard the shrill voices coming from a corner of the Proving Grounds. Blade thought he heard her click her tongue, but it was probably just his imagination.

“Lunaria sure is popular, huh?”

With the wall she had put up between herself and everyone else now torn down, Lunaria had lost a lot of her prickliness and softened up quite a lot. These days, she was proving rather popular with the junior class. A bunch of the girls were with her now, asking for some instruction.

“Why doesn’t anyone come to me?” muttered Earnest.

“Because if they did, you’d probably say something like ‘go do ten thousand practice swings first,’ wouldn’t you?”

“Well, just because you hang out with a genius doesn’t mean their talent is gonna rub off on you, is it? If an ordinary person wants to surpass a genius, they’d need at least a hundred thousand practice swings under their belt, right?”

“The number’s going up now, huh?” Blade laughed.

Earnest clearly wasn’t a fan of Lunaria’s popularity. She was…what was the word? Jealous. Blade himself didn’t really understand that concept, but still, he could tell that Earnest’s current behavior was what people generally referred to as jealousy.

She wanted to be someone else’s teacher, too. She wanted to be admired and have people fawn over her.

“Hmm… I wonder if there’s anyone out there, though? Someone who’s cute and younger than me, who won’t complain no matter how harsh my training is, and who also has enough guts to be worth teaching.”

And just as Earnest muttered this to herself…

“Hello, milady. Lovely weather we’re having.” Leonard, passing by, quickly crossed in front of them.

“Yes, yes, it’s a great day. Looks like your head is up in the clouds, too, Leonard.”

Earnest quickly shooed him away.

Sheesh. Poor guy.

Here he was. Someone with guts and the willingness to obediently follow even the harshest orders. He wasn’t a cute younger guy, though—more handsome and the same age as her—but still.

“Hey, don’t look away.” Blade thrust forward with his sword, cutting off a strand of Earnest’s hair.

“Hey! You cut it just now, didn’t you? You cut it!”

“Keep looking away like that, and I’ll shave your head.”

“Die!”

Earnest then got serious enough that Blade had to stop talking for a moment.

○Scene II: Encounter with the Beast

It was a rare day off—and with that, a rare visit to the city. As rigorous as the training was at Rosewood Academy, its students still deserved to enjoy some free time at least once a week, and Earnest was enjoying this weekly reward by walking alone through the city.

It would’ve been nice to go shopping with the girls or maybe have lunch at a restaurant somewhere. But wandering around alone, with no particular destination in mind, was really enjoyable. Truly, she thought there was no greater luxury in life than having the freedom to waste time. She had escaped from her usual packed training schedule, and now she was using just two hours that she’d allotted strictly for her own relaxation.

In the distance, she saw a crowd of people.

That looks interesting. Let’s go check it out.

Earnest headed over without thinking too much about it.

“Grorrrrrrrh…”

There was a huge, roaring beast.

“What’s that…?”

It was a monster about ten feet tall that looked like a cross between a person and a wolf—a very strange form to take. It was roaring at the heavens in a district on the outskirts of town mainly populated by blacksmith forges.

“Have you ever seen a magic beast, little lady?” a local craftsman asked her, his thick arms no doubt built up at the forge.

“Oh? You called me ‘little lady’?”

“…Ah, yeah, I bet you townsfolk have never seen one. They must be pretty rare, huh?”

“N-no, I’ve seen them,” Earnest hastily replied. How many magic beasts were enrolled in her school at the moment? There were at least a few. But the Overlord was half-demon, Cú rarely went around in her dragon form, and Ein and Zwei, despite their abnormal size, were basically just birds, really.

Now that she thought about it, Earnest realized that she had never seen a real, stereotypical, “genuine” magic beast. Until now, that is.

“This one is a…lycan, right?”

Earnest recalled what she had read in a book somewhere. These were magic beasts that took the basic form of a wolf but with humanoid limbs. Their height varied, but they usually clocked in at between ten and fifteen feet tall, and they could weigh anywhere from several hundred pounds all the way up to a ton. Despite their size, they were extremely nimble and fast, making them suited for high-speed combat.

Yep. There could be no mistake.

“Hmm! You know your stuff, little lady.”

Being called “little lady” by this beefy blacksmith made Earnest feel strangely self-conscious. For a moment, she considered introducing herself as the Empress, head student at Rosewood Academy, but in the end, she decided to stick with her passerby little-lady persona.

“What’s going on with that magic beast? Why’s he roaring like that? And what’s he doing in the middle of the city?”

“Oh, they come here all the time. They do business with the forges here.”

“All the time? Really?”

That was news to Earnest. She had never heard in school that magic beasts came into cities, even in the outskirts like this. She saw them as creatures(?) that normally inhabited the wilderness or the underground world known as the demon realm.

She added the question mark to “creatures” because it still wasn’t certain if magic beasts should be classified among regular creatures or not. The definition of a “creature” was something that was born, lived, reproduced, left offspring, and then died. Magic beasts were generated rather than born. They suddenly appeared in mature form from deep underground, wherever a certain concentration of the matter known as miasma had concentrated itself. Some of them did reproduce, like the egg-laying dragons and the Nightwalkers that bred with humans to leave hybrid offspring, but those were rare exceptions. In general, magic beasts simply appeared.

When newly spawned, these magic beasts might be large in size, but they possessed zero intelligence. All they did was fight and eat, and they were basically immortal. They had no lifespan the way people defined it; their ability to heal physical damage was so great that they were all but invincible. The only way they met their end was if they were eaten. But even then, scientists had debated for years over whether this was equivalent to “death” in normal creatures.

One theory suggested that eliminated magic beasts returned to miasma, got circulated around underground, and were reborn again later, inheriting the characteristics of whoever defeated them—in other words, those who were stronger than them. The idea that they took the form of their vanquishers in their next lives made sense, given that all magic beasts sought out strength above all else.

So defeated magic beasts got reborn in a new form. But the ones that won, and won, and kept on winning, eventually changed as well. Through all that fighting, winning, and eating, they began to gain intelligence. Those that became strong enough began to wonder how can I fight better so I win even more? That was about the time they learned language and began speaking. Humans acquired wisdom and language first and then learned how to fight, but magic beasts did it the other way around. They got strong first, then gained intelligence.

“That one, though,” the man said, looking at the lycan before them, “he’s still in the early stages, I’d say.”

“The early stages?”

“Yeah, it’s been nothin’ but ‘groooar, groooar’ the whole time, y’know?”

“Oh, you’re right.”

Grorrrrrrrh…

It roared again.

“If I had to guess, this one’s decided to find a bunch of humans and get a weapon or somethin’. He’s probably smart enough to see that as a way to get stronger.”

“Huh,” Earnest said vaguely as she stood there, watching the magic beast roar away. “Doesn’t look too intelligent to me.”

“Well, that’s because he’s still in the process of becoming intelligent. He can’t speak too well just yet.”

“W-w-w-we-weapon…”

The magic beast chose that moment to speak its first word to the onlookers.

“He can speak!”

“Yeah, but that’s the only word he’s said so far. ‘Weapon.’ And what’re we supposed to do about that, huh? We don’t even know what kind of weapon he wants.”

The magic beast began to stir, spreading its arms wide and moving them around. It was trying to convey some sort of idea. Several of the blacksmiths dealing with it copied the gesture, spreading their arms and moving them around in an attempt at interaction, but the connection still wasn’t quite being made.

“Wait, are you actually gonna give a weapon to a magic beast?”

“Well, we’re blacksmiths, after all. If someone’s willing to use the weapons we make ’round here, we ain’t about to say no to them, man or beast.”

“What, for free…?”

Earnest couldn’t imagine that magic beasts went around with money. If it was about to produce a coin purse from somewhere, it’d be a pretty comedic sight.

The weapons made in this blacksmith district were one of the major exports for the kingdom—superb magical gear, brimming with magical force. They supplied Rosewood Academy with their training gear as well. They couldn’t just be giving that stuff away, right?

“Ha-ha-ha! Oh, the guy can pay us once he’s able to, y’know?”

The blacksmith seemed to find her question humorous.

“If you can use our weapons well and get stronger and more intelligent as a result—well, you can pay us back once you’re successful enough in life to afford it, we say. And maybe we won’t see the money—maybe it’ll be our kids or our grandkids—but as long as they repay us in some way, what’s the issue?”

It was said that magic beasts that reached the level of “spirit beast” had intelligence superior to even that of mankind. Some of these spirit beasts were also known to protect the human race. During the last great war with the Overlord, a lot of them fought on the human side—magic beasts, spirit beasts, even divine beasts. Earnest now thought she kind of understood why they sided with them.

Now a group of craftsmen approached the lycan, bearing a rather large object in their hands. It was a club, it looked like—but a really big one. Upon receiving it, the magic beast raised it high above its head and roared. It was expressing its joy at receiving the item, no doubt…but maybe not? Something about its roar was harsh and dissonant.

“Oh, were we wrong?”

“‘Wrong’? What did you get wrong?”

“Well, I’d tell you if I knew, but I don’t. I guess the guy just didn’t want a club, is all.”

“Oh?”

Grorrrrrrrh…

That tremendous roar again. Earnest looked at it again. The magic beast was stamping its feet, making loud booming sounds as it did. It must have not liked the weapon it was given at all, judging by the roars and flailing about. The whole to-hell-with-this-crap atmosphere was palpable.

Grorrrrrrrh…

It threw the club away like a spoiled child, flinging its arms around wildly. The weapon flew through the air, destroying a house, and with every swing of this little brat’s arm, one or two more houses were blown apart.

Whoa, whoa, whoa!

The magic beast roared and ran down the street, crushing the houses on both sides.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!

Earnest stood there in a daze. The blacksmith had run away, but she wasn’t going anywhere. And now the magic beast was coming straight for her.

“Hey! Lady! Look out! You gotta run!”

Suddenly, Earnest came to her senses, remembering who she was. She took out Asmodeus, turning it ninety degrees just in case. Then she took her stance, using the flat side of her blade instead of the edge. Her target was the magic beast coming at her.

“If you’re a dog, then…sit! Sit!”

She struck it, just as Blade had done when he disciplined that dragon baby long ago. She beat it, smashed it knocked it down with all the force she had…and with one blow, she defeated it.

“Phew.”

Usually, this sort of thing was the job of the Capital Defense Force. The locals were lucky that Earnest happened to be around. The damage was limited to just a few houses, and fortunately, it looked like nobody had been caught inside. The residents must have evacuated in advance, fearing the worst-case scenario.

She swung Asmodeus back with a swift motion. The sword protested this, complaining about being used as a mere cudgel rather than a noble blade, but she snapped it back into its sheath.

As if on cue, cheers erupted from the crowd.

“Wow, little lady, that was amazing! So strong!”

“Huh?”

The blacksmith from earlier was praising her, too, along with everyone else.

It was strange seeing all these muscular men with thick arms and equally thick chest hair singing her praises like this, alternating between “little lady, little lady” and “amazing, amazing!”

Hmm. Yeah.

Then she recalled how when Blade knocked down the baby dragon with one blow before, he kept saying, “This is normal! Totally normal!” as everyone around him watched in abject shock. She thought she understood his side of things a little now.

I mean…this much is pretty normal, right…?

○Scene III: The Magic-Beast Apprentice

Later, the whole class was busy doing their usual training at the usual Proving Ground.

“Anna!”

Earnest, engaged with her afternoon practice session, was corralled by Yessica and the other latecomers.

“Anna! It’s here again, Anna!”

“It was sitting by the school gate! A wolf! A wolf! The triangle head and everything! In the most perfect pose! And the tail! Just the tail was going back and forth!”

Yessica was still calm, but Claire was panting for breath. Earnest had strictly ordered it to not go in through the school gate, and apparently, it was sticking to that command.

They had already given the magic beast a name. Given the red tone of his fur, he was now officially Redwolf. People were already calling him just Wolfy, though.

“Aren’t you being a little cold to your new boyfriend?”

“Who’s my boyfriend? I’m treating him far better than you ever treated your entourage of hot bodyguards.”

Earnest always resented how this wench had so many men fawning over her.

“But lycans can get imprinted like that, too, huh? I had no idea.”

“Oh, I know what it’s like! I don’t think he has an ‘honored Father’ thing going on like me, though. It’s more like ‘Master,’ you know?”

The two magic beasts(?) at school were freely giving their advice to no one in particular.

Back at the forge district, Earnest had given that magic beast a good knock on the head, ordered him to sit, and now she was his best friend in the world. Apparently, he recognized Earnest as the “stronger being,” and ever since then, he had been following her around, which was proving a bit of a problem. In fact, when she gave him a name, that alone seemed to evolve his intelligence a step further. Now he was capable of speaking in broken sentences. “You, strong. I, fight you,” sort of thing—and in this really low, rumbling voice. It made the female students squeal like mad.

“A name is a vital, indispensable factor in the formation of the ego. Before I was given the name Iona by Claire, there was about a twenty percent decibel difference in SN-ratio clarity before and afterward.”

“I’m not listening…”

“Hee-hee-hee! With my high-spec functionality, it’s quite simple for me to guess why you are so fidgety today, Earnest.”

“I’m not fidgety!”

“Hey, Anna, if you don’t let him out of his ‘sit’ soon, I think he’s gonna be there for the next five years.”

Magic beasts were different from normal creatures. They could go years without eating or drinking.

“Ugh, fine! All right! You want me to deal with him? I’ll deal with him! Someone bring him in here!”

“He’ll come if you call for him,” noted Yessica. “I told him to come in when he heard you whistle for him.”

Oh. Really? They already arranged all that? Earnest was feeling a bit entrapped as she put her fingers to her mouth…and then glanced at Blade. He had been acting incredibly pouty all day. It made him look pretty ugly. She glanced at him, wondering what was up.

“I bet Blade’s jealous.”

Yessica, noted expert on the subtleties of male-female relationships, whispered into her ear. It made her eyes widen, and then her face light up, and then…

“Okay! ♡ C’mere! C’mon!”

So she whistled with her fingers—a different whistle than what she used to call for Ein and Zwei.

It didn’t even take a second. With a loud bang, a pillar of dust rose up in front of Earnest, and when it settled…

“You, call. I, come.”

The red lycan was there.

“Ahh, damn it, you broke the ceiling…”

Blade was right. There was a new hole in the ceiling of the Second Proving Ground. He didn’t look too happy as he looked up at it, tapping his shoulder with his sword. Tap, tap, tap, tap, tap. He showed no sign of stopping.

Oh, wow. He’s so irritated! So, soooo irritated!

“So? Go whine to the king about that.”

“Don’t you mean His Majesty? That’s disrespectful.”

Ah-ha-ha-ha! Blade called me “disrespectful”!

She was rolling on the floor internally. It took everything she had to fight back the laughter as she retained her cool Empress exterior.

“Atten-shun!”

Everyone training in the Proving Ground stopped what they were doing and turned toward her.

“All right, everyone, we’ve got a real good practice partner for you today. He’s not quite as much of a super-being as the super-being we have…and not as much of a monster as General Dionne, either. He’s just a little bit stronger than us. A real good training partner. Okay?”

Based on their last engagement, Earnest would put him below herself and Lunaria, but above Sophie and Iona. Now that he had been named, though, he was a step more intelligent. If he played his cards right, he might’ve been a match for the Scions of Flame and Ice. For both the junior and senior classes, having an opponent only slightly better than them was a welcome new development.

“You okay with that, too, Redwolf?”

“I can, become, stronger?”

“You sure can. I guarantee it, in fact.”

“I, do it.”

The answer was simple as it was immediate.

Ugh! Come on! Stop being so cute!

Now Earnest understood a little bit why the girls were fussing over him. More than a little bit, even.

The sword at her waist trembled. She tapped at the hilt with one hand, as if patting its head. You’re cute, too, Asmodeus, she thought to herself—and it fell silent after that.

“All right, everyone! Time to kick off the next round of our extremely practical on-the-ground training!”

Ignoring the sulking Blade, everyone began practicing in what had now become a pretty convivial environment.

○Scene IV: Going Away

“Okay, Wolfy, let’s go!”

They were enjoying a game of volleyball now. Redwolf caught the ball hit by one of the girls with a claw, making a killer save. This, too, was training—or so he claimed—but really, he was just making up all kinds of excuses so they’d keep playing with him.

This incredibly serious-minded magic beast, hungry for strength and boasting the work ethic of a mountain monk, was turning even this into training. With claws sharp enough to cut through divine iron, he gently tossed the ball into the air without puncturing it. Given how they could vibrate at the molecular level, he should’ve been able to slice through most substances like butter, but…

…well, honestly, no one had any idea how he did that.

He was pretty much Wolfy to everyone now; only Earnest insisted on calling him Redwolf. Blade, meanwhile, called him “that damn fake-ass, hypocrite magic beast,” or “DFAHMB” for short.

Earnest took another look at Blade. He was still as pouty as ever, like he had just sucked on the tartest lemon in the universe. Ha-ha-ha! How else could she describe him? His face was so scrunched up. Hilarious.

“Hmph. Well, good for you, huh? You were looking for ‘someone who’s cute, younger than you, who wouldn’t complain no matter how harsh your training is, and who also had enough guts to be worth teaching,’ right? Well, perfect. Good for you. Phah!”

“What’s all that mean?”

“…Wha—?!”

Somehow, Blade was speechless… Wait. Did Earnest say all that at some point? He really didn’t remember.

“But, well, he’s leaving today anyway, huh? Aww, what a shame, huh? What a real, real shame! Such a shame, it’s almost a relief!”

This was probably Blade’s attempt at sarcasm. Even he had his cute side sometimes.

Today was the day Eliza would finally complete the custom-made weapon they had cooking for Redwolf. He had originally come to the city in search of a weapon, only to throw a fit because he felt that the large club they gave him just didn’t feel right. Earnest agreed—a speed-based fighter like him didn’t have much use for a blunt, heavy weapon like that.

So what kind of weapon would best suit his fighting style and bring out all his latent strength?

“Behold! Here comes the super-genius, Maxwell! Make way, mortals!”

Eliza arrived, cutting through the wind in her lab coat, accompanied by her erstwhile assistant, James. That assistant was carrying a metal case as large as a shipping container, making the most of his versatile bandages to support the weight. And when the case was opened…

“Are these…claws?”

There they saw a pair of clawed gauntlets, each three times the size of a normal hand.

“Allow me to explain. These claws are crafted from a mysterious type of metal known as ‘adamantite.’ I requested the assistance of a weapons workshop as I worked on these—I am just a mad scientist, you see, and weapon forging is out of my fields of expertise. Now, even in their original form, they are already more than powerful enough as weapons, but we also incorporated assorted forbidden techniques to enhance their magical force to the limit of what is currently possible. For example, through the careful alignment of electron orbital phases—”

“Ahh, that’s enough, thanks.”

This sounded like it was going to take a while, so Earnest waved her aside.

“Oh, shut up, you whiny Empress! You don’t ever interrupt a mad scientist bragging about specs! I’ll sneak into your dorm room and replace your brain with a positron model in the middle of the night!”

Eliza had been acting remarkably calm and normal lately, but clearly, she was back in her mad scientist wheelhouse again.

“My…weapon?” Redwolf tilted his head slightly.

“Yep. All yours.”

The giant magic beast reached out. These custom-made weapons were several times human size, but they both fit perfectly on his arms.

Awoooooo!

He raised both arms above his head and let out a battle cry. Several members of the junior class without a natural resistance to sound attacks fainted on the spot.

“I, can beat, you, now, when, I win, I win! And! I win, now!”

Redwolf turned his claws toward Earnest.

Oh? Win? Against who? Me? Your master?

“And if you beat me,” Earnest provokingly said with a smile, “what will you do then?”

“Eat, you!”

“Oooh, scary.”

It almost sounded like a marriage proposal.

She glanced over at Blade. He was unconsciously shaking one leg, but this was far more than a nervous tic. The ground beneath his feet was being pulverized to dust from all the intense vibration.

This magic beast had trained with human beings, and through that, he had mastered their assorted fighting techniques—strategy, tactics, feints and traps, the whole thing. He had also just obtained an incredible new weapon from Eliza. Combine all that, and the calculated improvement in his combat level was…

“I think Scion II would be enough for this?”

With a loud bang, Earnest transformed, going straight into Scion of Flame II.

Previously, Earnest would create a gigantic fireball around her body, bathing herself in its unthinkable heat to bring her temperature up to tens of thousands of degrees, letting her transform into Part Two. However, by more thoroughly refining the flame-attribute spirit within her body, she had figured out a way to trigger the same effect with much less fuss. Earnest, too, was evolving day by day.

And once she stood in front of Redwolf in that form…she could sense the clear confusion in his mind.

“Can…I, win? Me? Win? Eat? …Me, eaten?”

“What? Worried about losing before the fight even starts? You should turn in your magic-beast badge right now.”

Grooorh…!

His fighting force and beastly energy surged. This was what a magic beast should’ve been—a truly fearless, truly noble sort of creature.

“Now, now. What kind of naughty child is this, talking about defeating and eating Earnest while ignoring me the whole time?”

The Scion of Ice was next to Earnest. It was Lunaria, who had also transformed into her Scion II form instantly.

“What are you doing? Step back. Redwolf is my student.”

“Why don’t we make it a threesome? I’d like to see how strong he is…and besides, I want to have some fun, too.”

“You really love butting in and taking people’s toys from them, don’t you? Just the tackiest behavior…”

And so, faced with these two scions, the magic beast…was utterly panicking. If he were human, he would’ve been crying, or close to it. But magic beasts didn’t cry. They couldn’t. Lycans didn’t have tear ducts.

“Oh. Right. There were three of us here, weren’t there?”

“Huh? You still want to do this? Well, if you insist…”

Boom! Splash!

Flames and ice shot up into the air as the scions transformed even further.

“Now… Come on, won’t you? At least give us your full effort.”

The lycan might not be able to cry, but he sure looked like he was crying his eyes out as he waved his arms and charged at them.

○Scene V: Farewell, Redwolf

Long shadows stretched their way toward the setting sun before gradually disappearing. Everyone was standing at the school gate, waving good-bye.

Redwolf, who had been beaten to a pulp by the Scions of Flame and Ice, waved his claws as he walked away, a refreshing new sense of clarity in his mind. He had the weapons he wanted, and he considered that enough of a triumph.

“Well, there goes Wolfy.”

“Yeah. Though I guess I’m glad he’s just leaving the school instead of life in general.”

“There he goes. It was nice to see Earnest’s cute side while he was here.”

Claire, Yessica, and Lunaria each saw him as more human than not.

“Better luck next time!”

“And don’t come back!”

“Hmph. Don’t you dare darken my lady’s door again. Final warning.”

Clay, Kassim, and Leonard, meanwhile, were treating him as a loser mutt, Leonard in particular ready to declare war right now.

“Byeee!”

“You’d better come back. Try to eat me next time. I’ll eat you back.”

Cú and the Overlord saw him off as fellow magic beasts. “Eat,” in this case, had a meaning more akin to “let’s fight again” in human language.

“That magic beast was a very interesting creature. I would like to become his disciple and learn the secret of how he managed to disturb my master’s heart so deeply.”

Iona was her usual high-spec self.

“I’m not disturbed! I’m glad he’s gone! Hey, you piece of junk! What’re you even talking about, huh? What’s wrong with you?”

“C’mon, Blade. Stop carrying on. We’re saying good-bye here.” Earnest reached out with one hand and touched Blade on the cheek.

“Um, okay…”

That little motion was enough to shut him up. He stood side by side with Earnest, watching the back of the nosy magic beast as he gradually disappeared into the distance.

“You know…”

“What?” replied Earnest, startled.

“I-if you’re feeling that lonely…like, I can start practicing with you a little more from now on. So…like, stop feeling lonely.”

“…What?”

Earnest suddenly understood what Blade was saying.

Hee-hee-hee!

She smiled.

He’s worried about me. He cares about me. My apprentice Redwolf is gone, and now Blade’s worried about me.

Earnest moved about six inches to the side, leaving almost no space between them. She tilted her head a bit, halfway resting it on Blade’s shoulder.

“So were you jealous? Like, really, really jealous?”

“Wh-wha—? No, you dumbass! Of course not! Besides, I don’t even know what ‘jealous’ means! I’ve never even felt it before! I don’t get it at all! Moron! You’re such an idiot! Idiot! Idiot!”

“Hee-hee!”

Blade was completely flustered, his face bright red as he spat and cursed. Earnest responded with a dazzling smile. The sun set, marking the end of the day.

○Scene VI: A Predictable Postscript

“Hey, did you hear the story?”

“Yeah. Real scary, isn’t it?”

“Yeah, for real.”

It was morning in a school hallway, and the students were talking among themselves.

“Good morning,” Earnest said, cheerfully smiling at them all. She had been feeling exceedingly good lately; recent events had put her in a really good mood. But…

“Oh. Empress…um. Good m-morning.”

…the students who usually greeted her just as cheerfully were now quickly averting their eyes, walking off like they were fleeing from her.

Huh? What? What’s going on?

Earnest, left in the dust, helplessly blinked.

And why the stutter? That’s weird. What’s up with today?

Back in the classroom, she looked for Yessica. She was always the first to hear any rumors around school—she wanted to join the kingdom’s intelligence agency, after all.

“Hey, Yessica, can you tell me why everyone’s avoiding me right now?”

“Huh? …Oh! Earnest! M-morning! ♪ Oh, right, I gotta go to my next class!”

Earnest turned to block her best friend. “No running away. Tell me.”

Yessica looked to her classmates for help. She received nothing but cold stares in return, as if she were the designated human sacrifice for the day.

“Haaah…” She let out a big, reluctant sigh, then began to speak, resolved to her fate.

“…It’s just an unconfirmed rumor. I’m thinking about sending some scouts out to check on it later.”

“Okay.”

“Over on the Fifth Bridge down south…there’s apparently been a series of random attacks.”

“Well, someone needs to address that. What’s the CDF doing?”

“This attacker doesn’t strike regular citizens, though. Just the police, military, and other armed people.”

“Armed people?”

“And when he defeats them, he seizes their weapons.”

“Their weapons? Why?”

“We’re talking almost a hundred weapons by this point. The people who lost them are really pissed about it, let me tell you.”

“A hundred? Wait, wait, wait. Why did it get that bad before anyone talked about it?”

“Well, supposedly, the reason it didn’t come to light until now was because the CDF kept it a secret until they were stripped completely naked…”

“What? Wow. That’s beyond negligence. That’s treason!”

“Right, so the culprit, so to speak, is supposedly based around that bridge. He’s completely covered in hair, about ten feet tall…”

“Big guy, huh? Wow. No wonder he’s strong.”

“‘Strong’ is an understatement, I think…”

“All right. Let’s go on patrol tonight. Another girls’ mission. Let everyone know for me, okay? We’ll do it tonight.”

Earnest was the leader of this sort of female-only town watch that assembled as needed to protect the city. “Girls’ Mission,” they called themselves.

“W-well…I mean, if you’re going out, Anna, I think the problem’s gonna solve itself pretty quickly, uh… Ha-ha-ha-ha…!”

“Huh?” Earnest raised an eyebrow. “What’re you talking about?”

“It still hasn’t dawned on you yet?”

Her best friend, now dead serious, poked her hard in the chest—her way of telling Earnest to just shut up and listen to the voice in her heart. Then…

“…Oh.”

Now she knew. And she wished she didn’t.

“Ughhh…”

The identity of this serial weapon thief was fairly obvious to her now.

“Boy, oh boy,” remarked Yessica, “I bet he sure loved getting those weapons, didn’t he? Like, super delighted. I bet it’s made him into a hardcore weapon maniac, in fact… So! Here’s a question for you, Earnest. When a trainee falls to the dark side like this, what should his master do?”

“Tch…” Earnest clicked her tongue and turned her head away, muttering to herself. “You were supposed to just cleanly disappear forever after that. Damn moron…”

• Chapter 1: Are They on to Me?

This episode is about Blade worrying over how many people have figured out his secret identity and exploring his psychology as he grows increasingly concerned. I thought it’d be interesting to depict various human relationships by dividing the characters into those who suspect something, those who have no idea, and those who have only just found out.

• Chapter 2: Claire Mountain

In this story, Claire gets really big, proving that differences in size don’t necessarily determine fighting ability. Also, I just like giant beautiful women.

• Chapter 3: Lunaria’s Troubles

This story provides an additional exploration of Lunaria, the new heroine who debuted back in Volume 5. It’s difficult to delve into such details in longer stories, but when I have nine short ones, I can dedicate one entirely to a single theme and turn it into a standalone episode like this.

• Chapter 4: The Life of a Normal Person

I really like Evangelion: Campus Apocalypse! So here’s Campus for Heroes for you. You can also catch a glimpse of Blade’s awesomeness during his Hero days.

• Chapter 5: Blade the Masseur

This is the story of how Blade invented his own school of massage. I got this idea while thinking about how a “master” of one field can sometimes become an instant “master” in another field out of nowhere.

• Chapter 6: Clay the Wise

It’d be boring to devote a whole bunch of pages to some dry description of spirit and what it means in this world, so I used a short story to delve into it instead. I also wanted to explore all the abuse Iona endures. Though I guess it’s not really abuse, per se, but more her experiencing the joys of being trampled on like a welcome mat all the time.

Shin Araki

A character-oriented novelist making it work in the light-novel biz. Also publishes on Shousetsuka ni Narou. Member #0001 of the More Heart-Soaring Light Novels Society.

Illustrator: Haruyuki Morisawa

An illustrator born in Toyama Prefecture and now living in Tokyo. I drew the art for this volume while watching the Rio Olympics.